"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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I think I'm an AFC - Advice needed quickly. (Very Long)

Joeybphs

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Well, I've gone without my phone for a couple weeks, and having just started using it again I read some late texts from her. There are three:
[Don't mind the order or the times, my phone gets things messed up a lot."
May 9th, 11 pm
"And ok the dream im sure was a one time thing, it doesnt mean i like you like that. just friends. maybe something will happen in the future i have NO Idea."

I haven't said anything, but I get a text at 3:12 am, still May 9th

"I still feel like i need to kiss somebody right now haha stupid hormones."

11 pm, May 9, still haven't said anything

"We'll have known each other like 7 years by the end of HS. That's a long time for nothing to happen"

Blah. More hints, I take it?

And guy above me, thank you, that's exactly what I needed to hear.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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U

user43770

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Who gives a sh1t if she wants to kiss you or not? Kiss her and see what happens...

The kiss on the cheek turn is perfect for you. Try it or hate yourself forever; it's up to you.
 

Joeybphs

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Fantastic, I have a close friend homing in on her too. And he's much smoother and better looking than I am. Drama is gay.

Also, sorry for all the *****ing. I'll go for it tomorrow. Thanks.
 

S.Y.L

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Next time you see her, you are going to kiss this chick.

No excuses. You will feel awesome after.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Joeybphs

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I chickened out like a *****, the opportunity never really presented itself [suppose that's just an excuse, it's my fault for not creating the opportunity], some guy asked her out yesterday and she said yes. Time to move.
 

Joeybphs

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Haha, yeah, this is the first girl I was really into but didn't get attached to, you know? Made things a hell of a lot easier. I even congratulated her on her first boyfriend, heh.
 

blacksham

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Hey man, Im new to this forum, but your situation really reminds me of myself.

I have a "friend" with which I was in a fairly similar situation. The thing is though, that I think as others have suggested, she might be using you as just some practice. I personally would highly advise against that, because it can ruin a great friendship.

Sometimes, the platonic love of a friendship can lead to great relationships, but I have also seen it fail more often than not. It often leads to people believing that they would be great together, when in honesty, they are too similar for romantic intrest, but can have platonic friendship.

For me it was a girl I really liked last year. She and I got really close to dating but she ended up with another guy due to a lot of events. Anyways, she and I are now really close friends, she tells me stuff she barely tells anyone else. I still often have... thoughts... about her, in many different ways, and we (vicariously though a Mock Trial team) have this whole spanking tradition that we just see as being a joke, but I still find myself highly aroused at times from this contact.

I guess what Im trying to say is be careful. She might be a great match for you, but you might be risking more than you realize.

Hope it all works out for the best!
-Cheers


Edit: Sorry, I didn't read all of your posts, and missed the one about her already being asked out. Hope you find someone good for you.
 
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U

user43770

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blacksham said:
For me it was a girl I really liked last year. She and I got really close to dating but she ended up with another guy due to a lot of events. Anyways, she and I are now really close friends, she tells me stuff she barely tells anyone else. I still often have... thoughts... about her, in many different ways, and we (vicariously though a Mock Trial team) have this whole spanking tradition that we just see as being a joke, but I still find myself highly aroused at times from this contact.

I guess some of us are meant to be emotional tampons; do yourself a favor and stop giving her a shoulder to cry on. I know you think that you can weasel your way into her pants by acting like her best friend, but it probably won't happen. If she's telling your her inner-most secrets while she blows her BF...you have no chance.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Just_In

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Seems to me somehow somewhere she was turned on by you. Maybe one of her girlfriends mentioned you were hot, maybe she saw you change shirts or maybe even she saw a movie where 2 good friends became lovers or whatever. The thing is, she is noticing your sexuality, she's curious and she's been hinting you like crazy.

Don't waste too much time and make a move. Try to get the convo back to the kiss practise and go in.
 

blacksham

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TyTe`EyEz said:
I guess some of us are meant to be emotional tampons; do yourself a favor and stop giving her a shoulder to cry on. I know you think that you can weasel your way into her pants by acting like her best friend, but it probably won't happen. If she's telling your her inner-most secrets while she blows her BF...you have no chance.
It's not like that. You make it sound like its a fairly one sided friendship, which it isn't. The fact that I may try to help her or give her advice doesn't mean it isn't reciprocated. Similarly, I dont really want it to happen. I said that I occasionaly had thoughts (which though it is highly chauvinistic, I must admite) are fairly sexual. I dont want to date her.

Thanks for the advice, but I've already made my choices, and it's not her. I may be as you put it "an emotional tampon" but it doesn't mean I'm stupid.
 
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