I Messed Up Texting Before First Date - What Should I Do?

[dmvdav]

I met a girl at a party, and by the end of the night she sucked my ****. She wanted sex but I told her no (i don't know why).

I intended to turn the one night stand into a multiple night stand, so I texted her a few days later saying we should get together for drinks. She agreed, I set a day (tonight) and everything went fine.

Earlier today she texted me "We still on for tonight" and then things got weird. She lives 15 minutes from me, and I was going to take her to a fun spot ten minutes from her place (so 25 from mine). I wanted to be sure she was cool with the distance between mine and her place for the future, and I wanted her car at my place so she would have to come back after the date. It doesn't make sense for her to drive to my place first, but I wanted her to do it anyway.
Here is the full convo:

Her: Hey we still on for tonight?
Me: Yea lets meet at my place at 9
Her: How about you pick me up at 9
Me: That doesn't make sense
(even though it makes perfect sense)
Her: Where are we going?
Me: I'm going to {place}
Her: ... ok fvck face. Have fun.
Me: You aren't coming with me?
Her: If you pick me up on the way...
Me: Ok i'll be there at 9. What's your address?
(I realized she was right about me picking her up first, but I didn't want to admit it).
She stopped texting me after that, and still didn't' give me the address.

I know saying "ok" was one of the stupidest things I could have done, but I did it because I THINK I can reverse the damage on the date.

But i'm also thinking about not going now.
Without changing anything that already happened, what would you do from here?

 

[Stugots26]

I think you completely fvcked this up.

This is why you set a definite date for a definite time and place in advance. All logistics taken care of. That way you don't have to confirm anything day of. You just show up and if she can't get on board with that it's over before it starts.

It's good that she got in touch to see if you're still on, so she wanted to see you. It's bad that you d!cked around on text and then capitulated to her demand.

Put a fork in this one. Next!

Do not text, do not call. Nothing. If she gets in touch with you, say "Good to hear from you, when are you free to get together?" Then wait for her to respond. If she gives you anything less than her specific availability then you say, "Ok, well I'd like to see you, so check your calendar and get back to me." Then you wait. If she gives you specific availability then you say, "Great. This place, this time, this day. If something comes up get in touch otherwise I'll see you there." That's it. Done.

 

[dmvdav]

Just flake completely? I was thinking about doing that, but it just seems a little extreme when I'm not entirely sure i've fully lost frame with this girl.
Like you said, she was interested enough to confirm, and it's not hard for me to say I got the directions messed up.

I may do it just for the challenge of doing it, because I think deep down i'm scared to flake on her.

 

[_sideways_]

I would have deleted her after her calling me
me fvck face

 

[GS750]

Yeah...being called fvckface wouldn't sit well with me either. I may have texted back thanks for the blowie and then ignored Lol

 

[_sideways_]

Blowie lol...yea...the respond shoukd have been....since u gave me the blowie, woukdnt that make u the fvck face....

 

[TheCWord]

Some of you guys and your over gaming. Your whole "I'm going to X" as if to imply that you could care less if she goes with you is classic fake alpha BS which you confirmed by immediately dropping the act and gravelling to her. She was right to call you fck face. You were wrong to reply after that.

 

[jimmy18]

This is why you shouldn't fvcking text... even if she texts first

Too much room for misinterpretation, which is the last thing you want with a new prospect

Like here:

Her: Where are we going?
Me: I'm going to {place}

PICK UP THE PHONE AND CALL HER NEXT TIME

 

[Thorninmyside]

She wanted a lay and you didn't give it to her.
She wanted a ride and you didn't give it to her.

You've told her you're a pill from the beginning. Why be so difficult? The CWord is right. The fake alpha routine is ghey.

 

[JoshSway]

Your real screw up here, to be honest, was the fact that you didn't sleep with her. I know it sounds weird but women get way more attached after sex than anything else, even "almost sex".

This made it much harder to recover from your latter screw up which was a screw up as well, especially when you picking her up puts the transportation power in your hand which is generally a benefit for you to close in the first place!!

 

[JohnChops]

this is a perfect example of trying to hard to game. You tried to make it seem like "oh I dont care, just come with me" then the whole picking her up thing, thats pretty damn normal, have you never picked up a girl for a date? I prefer to drive lol. Less game playing, just be straight forward.

also what jimmy said, when she asked where "WE" we were going, dude you already had a date set up why did you say "IM"... doesnt make any sense.

 

[No.Danny]

You stooopid

 

[hudpes]

Her: Where are we going?
Me: I'm going to {place}
Her: ... ok fvck face. Have fun.
Me: You aren't coming with me?

This here is what's wrong. First you tell her she's only a tag-along, then you take her pouting seriously. A quick salvage would be: Look, I wanted to surprise you by taking you somewhere special. Thank yourself for ruining the surprise! I still want to pick you up, I'll have your address.

Oh and to answer your question - you're in way too deep, can't backpedal so far back... Don't text again. The only possibility is a face to face talk, tell her you've been stupid, but stand tall with your head up high, and wear a slight smile. If you can't do that, call her a few days later, don't explain, just say, hi, can we meet? If she inquires for more, just tell her you don't want to do this over hte phone, you'll explain everything when you see her. She will be curious what your reasons might be and I suggest honesty, again, don't be meek. Heroes are strong even when they are at their most vulnerable.

 

[devilkingx2]

dude, make up your mind, do you hate this girl or do you want to bang her?

half that post makes it sound like you're being as intentionally difficult as possible because you despise her and want her to leave you alone.