I have no game in clubs

[snowdog]

In the field or in bar area's, i have pretty good game. I'm not a pimp or anything, but i don't have any trouble socializing with chicks.

Anyway, yesterday my buddies insisted we went to a club. I was like 'what the hell it's saturday' so i just went along.

When we got there i was just ****ing stumped. The average age there must have been 17 or something. Ok, what the hell, i'll just start drinking beer and it'll all work out. Now, i hate everything about clubs. I hate the music they play, i hate the general atmosphere and i hate not being able to have a normal conversation because the obnoxious music is always too loud.

Another thing is, my game level litteraly drops to zero when i'm in these places. Always at the end of the evening, i'm looking around and i am one of the few that hasn't hooked up. And it is especially frustrating since i'm most of the time a few levels above the guys that did in terms of looks and general value.

Anyway, after i drank enough beers i started to dance to the music. When i'm drunk i can even enjoy listening to a broken AM radio (Being drunk usually improves my game, because i become more witty and sarcastic. Chicks like that ****). Problem is, i don't really know what to do next. I'm always dancing alone or around my buddies drinking beers and having fun. If i see a girl that's appealing, i make eye contact and stuff, and normally i would engage in a conversation. But in a club i can't because of the loud music. Help me here, WHAT DO I DO NEXT? If i move to her while dancing it just feels akward and stupid... please fella's help me out here. A lot of my friends like clubbing so i will need some advice for the future for this.

At one point some girl was actually making fun of me, i don't even know why. It may be my dancing style but it wasn't any less retarted then what the other guys where doing. She said really sarcasticly, 'you're doing great' or something, several times. No ***** is making fun of me in front of my friends so i made some really sarcastic and horrible degrading comment to her and she just stormed off pissed while everyone around us bursted out laughing. At least that's one mission completed.

 

[snowdog]

Did i mention that i even don't have enough game in clubs as a 20-year old college dude to even interest these 17-year olds? Yes, it's that bad.

 

[Someone Much cooler]

bars are more about the beer and talking and conversation, clubs are more about dancing and drinking and lounges are more about dancing and socializing and some drinking. You should just stop using the beer as a crutch and go holla at the girls when you see one you like

 

[COD]

sheesh learn bar approaches..........INITIATE----RAPPORT BUILDING, KINO---ISOLATE----KISS.

 

[Create Reality]

my club game has usually revolved around dancing and blatant amoging. works okay sometimes

 

[Tha Realnezz]

Every guy sucks in the club cuz women act extra-b1tchy in there.

Seriously,every guy i know hates the club unless it's an event and its literally 20 to one women to men type ratios...

 

[Obsidian]

1. learn some dance moves if you don't know any
2. just (preferably) make eye contact first and then grab a girl by the hand/arm and start dancing. Disclaimer: This approach will not work every time. Grind, when appropriate.
3. after sufficient kino during the dance, isolate the girl (you may have to leave the club; it depends on what conversation/isolation-friendly areas they have)
4. talk a little bit, make out with her if appropriate; etc.
5. if you're looking for a ONS, then invite her over to your place

i don't actually have a whole lot of official club experience (I've only been twice), and I don't do ONSs, but i've been to a lot of greek parties, which are pretty similar. I think the main trick is to go for the kino first and THEN build rapport later, which is kinda backwards from normal PUA tactics. The downside is that you never know what kinda girl you'll pick up, and she'll probably be a hor. Don't go to clubs to find actual relationships. Just go to have fun, kino, get exercise, and possibly do a ONS.

 

[Craig Reeves]

Hey there, snowdog!

I completely understand your frustrations about club game. Luckily, after several years of studying social dynamics in nightclubs, I've become much, much better in clubs and they are now a great place for me to meet lots of women at a time.

I hope I can help you with this...

First of all, one of the biggest mistakes that guys make in the club is that they HUNT, instead of FISH...

Here's what I mean...

When most guys go into a loud club, they'll look around and see if they can find a girl they want to approach. The problem with this is that they forget, or in most cases, fail to realize, that the power they have to DHV verbally in a loud club with lots of distraction is greatly limited compared to quieter locations. Therefore, the way to win in the clubs is through social proof.

The absolute best way to gain social proof, unless you're blessed with really good looks (which also generates social prood), is to be seen socializing with others who have lots of social proof. Basically, here's the deal: your goal when first entering a club is to find ANY set, and simply introduce yourself and talk for a SHORT amount of time, then quickly go over to another set. Keep doing this until you've socialized with a healthy amount of sets/people.

You see, this works because in clubs, there is a direct correlation between how many people you're seen socializing with and your social proof/value. Eventually, you'll be seen socializing with attractive women, and the more attractive the women are you're seen socializing with, the high your social value.

Don't just go into the club and look for somebody to approach. This is the HARD way of doing things. WORK THE ROOM. Go around and introduce yourself and talk to EVERYONE. Will every set be open to you? Of course not. People seem to be less friendly and more cliquish in clubs. But you'll find sets that are willing to let you join them.

Another thing. Try to avoid 18 and under clubs. The people there are INSECURE and CLIQUISH more often there. Not to mention they seem to attract drama more often as well. Not to mention that 21 year olds (and older) are far more socially versatile and open than 18 year old high school girls who are just getting used to the real world.

I hope this helps....

Here's a rule - Social value SKYROCKETS when being seen with attractive women.

 

[snowdog]

1. learn some dance moves if you don't know any
2. just (preferably) make eye contact first and then grab a girl by the hand/arm and start dancing. Disclaimer: This approach will not work every time. Grind, when appropriate.
3. after sufficient kino during the dance, isolate the girl (you may have to leave the club; it depends on what conversation/isolation-friendly areas they have)
4. talk a little bit, make out with her if appropriate; etc.
5. if you're looking for a ONS, then invite her over to your place

i don't actually have a whole lot of official club experience (I've only been twice), and I don't do ONSs, but i've been to a lot of greek parties, which are pretty similar. I think the main trick is to go for the kino first and THEN build rapport later, which is kinda backwards from normal PUA tactics. The downside is that you never know what kinda girl you'll pick up, and she'll probably be a hor. Don't go to clubs to find actual relationships. Just go to have fun, kino, get exercise, and possibly do a ONS.

Thanks there mate. And believe me, the last ****ing thing i'm looking for in this point in my life is a relationship.

Hey there, snowdog!

I completely understand your frustrations about club game. Luckily, after several years of studying social dynamics in nightclubs, I've become much, much better in clubs and they are now a great place for me to meet lots of women at a time.

I hope I can help you with this...

First of all, one of the biggest mistakes that guys make in the club is that they HUNT, instead of FISH...

Here's what I mean...

When most guys go into a loud club, they'll look around and see if they can find a girl they want to approach. The problem with this is that they forget, or in most cases, fail to realize, that the power they have to DHV verbally in a loud club with lots of distraction is greatly limited compared to quieter locations. Therefore, the way to win in the clubs is through social proof.

I see, although i missed what you mean with "DHV"

The absolute best way to gain social proof, unless you're blessed with really good looks (which also generates social prood), is to be seen socializing with others who have lots of social proof. Basically, here's the deal: your goal when first entering a club is to find ANY set, and simply introduce yourself and talk for a SHORT amount of time, then quickly go over to another set. Keep doing this until you've socialized with a healthy amount of sets/people.

Hmmmm... i see. I don't ever bother trying to talk to most people there anymore. I tried before, but just stopped because when trying to make a conversation it doesn't work because i'm also pretty much deaf already (i play in a rock band). But i'll pick it up again.

You see, this works because in clubs, there is a direct correlation between how many people you're seen socializing with and your social proof/value. Eventually, you'll be seen socializing with attractive women, and the more attractive the women are you're seen socializing with, the high your social value.

Does this 'high social value' thing actually work? I never realized that.

Don't just go into the club and look for somebody to approach. This is the HARD way of doing things. WORK THE ROOM. Go around and introduce yourself and talk to EVERYONE. Will every set be open to you? Of course not. People seem to be less friendly and more cliquish in clubs. But you'll find sets that are willing to let you join them.

Tip noted.

Another thing. Try to avoid 18 and under clubs. The people there are INSECURE and CLIQUISH more often there. Not to mention they seem to attract drama more often as well. Not to mention that 21 year olds (and older) are far more socially versatile and open than 18 year old high school girls who are just getting used to the real world.

True. When we got there my first reaction was: "dudes, what the **** are we doing here".

I hope this helps....

Here's a rule - Social value SKYROCKETS when being seen with attractive women.

Yes, those are indeed some good tips you gave me. Thank you. I'll keep the social value thing in mind.

 

[snowdog]

1. learn some dance moves if you don't know any
2. just (preferably) make eye contact first and then grab a girl by the hand/arm and start dancing. Disclaimer: This approach will not work every time. Grind, when appropriate.
3. after sufficient kino during the dance, isolate the girl (you may have to leave the club; it depends on what conversation/isolation-friendly areas they have)
4. talk a little bit, make out with her if appropriate; etc.
5. if you're looking for a ONS, then invite her over to your place

i don't actually have a whole lot of official club experience (I've only been twice), and I don't do ONSs, but i've been to a lot of greek parties, which are pretty similar. I think the main trick is to go for the kino first and THEN build rapport later, which is kinda backwards from normal PUA tactics. The downside is that you never know what kinda girl you'll pick up, and she'll probably be a hor. Don't go to clubs to find actual relationships. Just go to have fun, kino, get exercise, and possibly do a ONS.

Ok... wait. You have got to help me out with "PUA" and "Building Rapport". I figured out what you mean with "ONS", which i pressume means 'one night stand'.

 

[snowdog]

bump...

 

[wheelin&dealin]

In clubs you have to act fast. If you see some hot chicks dancing, get out there and dance with them. Don't hesitate like some dork with zero game. What do you think women are doing when they're out on the dance floor?..... They're looking for a guy to step up and dance with them. Who cares if you get shut down.

 

[snowdog]

That's the 3 sec rule you're describing there right?

 

[rjones]

When I see girls I want to dance with I just come up from behind put my hands on their hips and start grinding them. If you like them just start talking to them get their number and find another one.

 

[diizy]

Okay, one, if you want game in the club you have to enjoy the atmosphere.

Its like trying to hunt for deer in a city... It doesnt work.

If you like the music, the atmosphere, the girls, they will feel that you are actually enjoying yourself and acknowledge that. That will get you more attention, I almost always have girls approach me as I love the venues I go to. Don't go to clubs just for girls, go to clubs to have fun.

I like working solo in clubs but bring some friends so if you loose your game you've got something to bounce back to. I don't usually just stand around in a group, I'm usually dancing with the people who are dancing and getting into the mood with them. Don't hesitate to make a move, but sometimes I'll just play with them and get into a half dance, let them go somewhere else and you can see how interested they are if the come back. (You can also loose them by doing this too.) I'm a pretty laid back person, and I don't need to put pressure on them or myself. I just shrug it off if I get shut down.

Key is, have fun otherwise people will know you aren't enjoying yourself, it's transparent.

Edit: As others stated, don't just try to pick up girls, socialize, make sure you know people, so when you walk around you go and you acknowledge people, you will look like you are someone. And it will make you come off less awkward. Best Tip: Get to know the DJ's (If you plan to attend regularily)

 

[snowdog]

I was dragged out to a night club recently by a half-dozen guys. Normally, I avoid these places because I'm in my mid-30's, even though I look a lot younger. It's poison to my game. I know it. I don't even try. But I haven't seen these guys in years so I went along with it.

First thing I did was break off from the pack. I didn't have a clue what to do with it, but I knew I had to keep moving. Standing in tow while these younger friends of mine did thier thing wasn't going to do me much good.

Occasionally I tried to just dance and see what happened. Nothing. Not much of a shock there. But the place was big enough that I could just keep moving and show up on opposite sides of the club every 15 or 20 minutes, allowing me to touch base again with the crowd I showed up with.

Now, I don't know. Maybe I was noticed and gave the impression that I wasn't alone yet I was doing my own thing. Whatever. But within an hour or so I was grinding a brunette that hit me up for a smoke.

Very nice after-party....

If I can score in these dumps in my mid-30's, well, to say that you don't have the goods is an insult....

Thanks for the confidence boost there. I know a big part of it is still in my head. When i'm not comfortable in my surroundings, my AFC side starts to show itself again.

Okay, one, if you want game in the club you have to enjoy the atmosphere.

Its like trying to hunt for deer in a city... It doesnt work.

If you like the music, the atmosphere, the girls, they will feel that you are actually enjoying yourself and acknowledge that. That will get you more attention, I almost always have girls approach me as I love the venues I go to. Don't go to clubs just for girls, go to clubs to have fun.

I like working solo in clubs but bring some friends so if you loose your game you've got something to bounce back to. I don't usually just stand around in a group, I'm usually dancing with the people who are dancing and getting into the mood with them. Don't hesitate to make a move, but sometimes I'll just play with them and get into a half dance, let them go somewhere else and you can see how interested they are if the come back. (You can also loose them by doing this too.) I'm a pretty laid back person, and I don't need to put pressure on them or myself. I just shrug it off if I get shut down.

Key is, have fun otherwise people will know you aren't enjoying yourself, it's transparent.

Edit: As others stated, don't just try to pick up girls, socialize, make sure you know people, so when you walk around you go and you acknowledge people, you will look like you are someone. And it will make you come off less awkward. Best Tip: Get to know the DJ's (If you plan to attend regularily)

Thanks for the tips there.

Next friday i'm going on holiday for a week with 2 other guys. Should be one big party, there will also be clubs. I'll report back here.