I have nexted my male freinds.....

[Boricua_33015]

I kno this isnt about girls but it is a high school forum and it has to do with a high school situation.

On friday I told one of my freinds that I am not going to hang out with him in school anymore. I have alwayz hung out with them (2 guys) in the morning before school and lunch. Things weren't going so well because for some reason or another they both think that they can say whatever they want to me, poke fun at me and treat me with no respect at all. I think I know why though. It all had to do with me in the beginning when I started being depressed and complained about everything how my life sucks and all, I was basically a complainer. SO, they both started seeing me as a weak person and they started taking advantage of that and all respect was lost.

I then stopped being so depressed and stopped complaining and got myself together. But they did not stop seeing me as the weak person I once was. SO they kept making fun of me, making me feel stupid, talking down to me, everything. I put up with this for 2 months thinking it would die down.

Then one day, I guess I said something stupid and one of them said "dawg, are u dumb? yo we should just beat this nigga down right now, what do u say?" I said, "shutup cuz u wont even touch me". Then the same guy says "yo the only reason why I havent beat u down is becuz I feel sorry for u, in fact, the only reason why I still chill with u iz becuz we feel sorry for u and we dont want to see u in school alone with nobody to chill with" (they are my only freinds, everyone else I kno are just acquaintances).

SO then I said "alrite then, peace" and just walked away. FOr the next week, I still chilled with them becuz I dont have anybody else to chill with. I felt very uncomfortable with them becuz I sense that they did not want me there or they didnt want to be seen with me, or maybe BOTH. I dont really fit with them. I am like the oddity of us three. I am nothing like them. But both of them are like mirror images. They think like each other, act like each other, dress alike, same style. I could probably be with them in the same style, but I have glasses and the glasses changes everything, making me a crossbreed with the gangsta/nerd look.

THen on friday of that week I told one of them that I am going to stop hanging out with them in school becuz "I am not going to chill with u guys if the only reason why u let me chill iz becuz u feel sorry for me. U guys dont seem to like me and Im not going to chill with people that dont like me." They said fine, in a relieved way.

Now I have nobody to hang out with in school. It sucks!! THe other people I kno, I am just acquainted with. Now it is too late to find a new group to hang out with becuz itll be weird that in the middle of the skool year I just go to a new group of guys and start talking to them like if its all good. People usually make their groups in the beginning of the year when they meet the new people in their classes and decide to hang out with each other.

I am thinking of just bringing my CD player to school now and being a loner and just sitting by myself or walking around the skool saying wussup to people in the mornings and in lunch. Ill probably start writing rhymes again becuz I used to but got discouraged/lazy. I am thinking of just doing this for the whole rest of the year. Itll be really bad I kno, but I have no choice. My whole status will go down and that wont be good if I want to be able to score with girls right!

I don't know what to do.

How can I enter a new group without coming off az weird/desperate/a loser/gay? How can I make a conversation with a new group? How can I just enter a conversation like nothing, not knowing who they are, them not knowing who am I, where I came from, or anything yet grab their attention and be interesting enough that they will continue on with the conversation with me?

This is a changing point in my life. Where I can start all over with a new group of people, less negative poeple, make a better impression than I did with my last 2 freinds. I am going back to school on Tuesday, so I really need help with this guys! later.

 

[SyNergy]

Dude don't let these guys bring you down, dont let anyone bring you down. You are walking around with no confidence, everything in life is about confidence. I am positive that you can make new friends. Just go up to someone you know and start talking or sit at their lunch table, then just be yourself, but be confident. Just think to yourself..Whats the worst that could possibly happen?

 

[Levex]

what did you expect... you become a whiny b!tch and expect your friends to still respect you? it doesnt work that way.

 

[Boricua_33015]

I dont think u read the whole post u queer. I didnt only post about that!

 

[Levex]

Originally posted by Boricua_33015
I dont think u read the whole post u queer. I didnt only post about that!

i did read that whole patheric post and all i can say is...your life is sad. had fun playing games on your PC whole saturday night?

 

[Gene Simmons]

Hey buddy, find something better to do then dog on someones thread. Anyway, you are probably the one who played ****ing videogames all nite you *******. People like you is what causes school shootings so shut the **** up.

 

[hummer47]

Yo levex your the type of person i would kick the crap out of because your a fag that thinks your way better than everyone else. @$$-hole!

 

[Brazilian_Blues_Boy]

Stop there girls!

This is a civilized forum. If Levex keeps his attitude he's not going to last much around. ( Yes, this was a warning)

And to Boricua_33015, just take it easy man, talk to the people you're not good friends more often, but do not try too hard to become their friends. Let things roll slowly and honestly.

And, yes, you're going to be by yourself a lot, and this will be a though, but very empowering experience. You'll see that you don't need anyone to be around with, and that you can chill out by yourself, making your raps or listening to some music.
This will give you a lot of self-confidence and self-assurance.

Just hold on tight, and don't let the bastards grind you down !!

BBB

 

[the lionheart]

Yea bro, just keep your head up through alla this. Turning aquaintances to friends isn't as daunting as it seems, just go up to people you're comfortable around and fit in. Don't be overbearing in that you always sit by these people, but make it your thing to maybe sit by them a couple days of a week and sit with other people / listen to music / write rhymes the other days.

 

[Boricua_33015]

hey the only reason why i dont have many freinds iz becuz i moved here a year and a half ago and I am only STARTING to get used to this new area. Dont call me a whiny *****, I kno what I did, I am man enough to admit it. Your post should not have been posted becuz I was asking for help, not an insult.

thanks everyone else.

 

[Levex]

buncha homos...and Brazilian check the posts and you'll see i wasnt the one who started flaming, i just basicly summed up all he said in his post into one sentence, so **** off with your warnings.

 

[Jimineye]

man

First off Levex grow up dude.


Ok anyways to the point, like you boruica I am in the midst of finding a new group. But the problem is they aren't at my school lol. But this is what I"m doing to make a different in my life and it sure has been helping.

First off don't go the way of the loner with the discman which is what I did in my freshmen year and it kinda ****ed me over till now. What you do is you get involved.

Do you have a job? Jobs are always a good way to meet more people that go to your school. Which is a way I've been meeting people and I just go up to them in school and start a conversation. Suggest doing things together, which will show that you have confidence.

I think you live in a big city right? Well in my city every weekend we have a cruise and thats how I meet girls and other people. And you know what, I do it by myself because my friends don't like to go out often, its like a chore to get them to go out. Going out by myself has helped me with my confidence, making me realize that I don't need anyone, and that I can do Anything

Are you athletic at all? I'm an athletic person but I haven't done sports for 3 years. So I decided that I would get my ass up and do a sport which I'm now going to do track. Before this time I did weightlifting... another confidence builder. Sports are a great way to meet people.

But you know what has been the ultimate thing for me? Take a moment and guess.

Its been goign to the mall BY MYSELF, and flashing a smile and making eye contact with ALL the ladies. I recently just realized how good looking I am. It took me awhile to put that when over 10 girls call me cute/hot that means that I'm good looking lol. So now I walk with a strut and always say "Hey" to any girls that hold a gaze with me. Today at work today I had 2 girls hold eye contact with me and say "hi" first.

The most important thing that YOU need to work on is your confidence. Right now you are just beating yourself down (thinks of the Korn song). Whenever it occurs to say this "I'm damn sexy, and Godly" trust me it builds you up. Find music that gets you pumped up. The songs that get me pumped up right now is "Bust A Move" and old school hip hop song, and the 50 Cent songs "Heat", and "In Da Club".

Boruica whats your msn messenger address or AOL address, I think I can help you better if you give me some details and what not, cause I'm pretty much out of the boat that you are in.

 

[USSOCOM]

The literacy bar just keeps getting lower and lower....

 

[potatostacks]

I misunderstood your original message, my mistake. disregard this post.

 

[aznbreakerjrey]

Umm, I don't find what Levex said at first to be that harsh. I thought of it more as laying down the truth in a tough love kind of way. Then he got flamed, he flamed back, yadda yadda.

As for Boricua, yooooo. Don't put up with negative people like that who put you down. They just want an ego boost at your expense. Ditch those bastards, and go off and meet new people. It's not that hard -- join clubs, sports teams, or you don't even have to do that if you just talk to new people and get new friends. You just have to get over the fear that people will think you're one weird mutha if you go over and approach them to talk. Arrite man, wish you luck.

 

[Eventide]

I played video games all saturday night

and thanks to SSA (school shooter anonymous) I haven't shot up the school in 2 months 1 week and 3 days!!

 

[E-Z Rider]

First of all, I don't think what levex said was deserving of a warning. He wasn't very tactful, but I've seen much worse by even some of the well-respected members of this forum. And you do have to admit he had a viable point. Sometimes you have to be harsh to get the point across effectively. And you can expect that for every harsh post there will be 4 or 5 supportive posts. That's the beauty of the open forum. But I digress...the mods have the right to warn whoever they wish, but I just wanted to give my input.

As for Boricua_33015...you need to gain self-confidence and self-reliance. I can tell you lack these by the way you get so defensive in your posts...this is the internet for goodness sakes, who gives a sh!t if someone flames you?

Now, more constructively, I believe that guys are attracted ('attracted' in the sense that they want to be buds with you) to a lot of the same things women are attracted to. Guys don't want a whiny ***** for a freind...they want someone who can take care of themselves and have something to offer intellectually and fun-wise. I know it's not an exact comparison, but I think it's worth noting.

My main point is that for other people to like you, you have to like yourself first. People in general, male and female, want to be around self-confident people. So take some time and work on yourself...read Lorenzo's posts "From Non-Don...to Don Juan!" (there are 3 i believe). These posts give you a good idea of what to do to improve yourself. Read this little essay called "Self-Reliance" by Ralph Waldo Emerson. I personally enjoy spending time by myself more than a lot of other things, and as a result I don't worry about what people think too much or how popular I am, and this lack of caring gives me a kind of power among my peers. So I don't take sh!t from anyone.

Just stick around here a li'l while. You'll learn. You've got a bright future ahead of you, man. I'm out- E-Z

 

[bob2007]

been there done that. Dude, what you gotta do is find a group of people you have something in common with, or people that are semi good friends with.

I had a few friends in grade 9, but i realized that it was them that was holding me back. My best friend was acting like he was better than me and ****, but I realized that it was him holding me back. I realized that nobody liked this guy. So I dropped him and moved on.

I hooked up with just another group. At first it was ackward, some of the people of the clique wont' like you, but **** them. Have some confidence.

Now, 3 years later since grade 9 I have a bunch of decent friends. And once your confidence grows, it becomes contagious and people start wanting to be your friend, not the other way around.