i don't know what to do

[Irs88]

Okay. I am kinda drunk right now. But I am really confused. This girl WANTED me at this party tonight. Everynoe kept sayin "go xxx, all yours man, go" She went close to me talked several times...i did NOTHING..i PUSSIED OUT. I guess its from the pressure of everyone...being the center of attention.(I was never good at being the center of attention)

I just cant help it. I read the book of pook, read all this other mystry stuff. I work out a lot. I went from a scrawny 110 short 5 8 weakling to a something 150 lb guy. Even with all that weight...all that change in confidence...i STILL cant talk to a girl straight on. I make stupid comments...get WAY to nervous. I get girls numbers but get way to scared to call them becuase I don't want to lose what I finally got...the acceptance from a girl, the feeling that im good enough. Im too much of a ***** to take that chance. Man...so many times...girls walked right past me. I am just so pissed of at myself.

I know I have to be the prize, i can recite most of this stuff on the back of my head. Yet I cant put it straight out...use all these skills...when I meet a girl. People say to look at how much you changed, dont compare yourself to better people. Well...I tried my best and i changed A LOT. However, im still so far away...and feel like such a failure.

I want my friends to see that I am capable of talking to a girl, I want my old friends to notice how much I changed for the better. This constant wanting for other peoples' accepence Is killing me inside out. I try my best to not care, to do my own thing. Hell, I lost most of my friends trying to gain all this weight. I sacrficed so much yet I feel like im still at square one.

sigh

 

[BadBoyJake]

Your thinking too much dude. Do you ****ing here yourself? I'm worried about this and that. A couple of words for you **** IT!! Just do it. Think of the women as just another guy with a ***** between their legs and don't give a **** what they say or think.

 

[Irs88]

im trying to let my testestorone control what i do and say. not give in from other people. Its just sometimes....

I look at the guys around me...like tonight...

Those TALL guys, the genetically gifted muscular "hunks", the gangsters, the white guys, their social value...its jsut not FAIR that I dont get those genes....I just loose it and smoke a cig or some stupid ****. A short pre-med indian with a medium built just can't compete with these guys. Im out of my league. I KNOW I SHOULDNT THINK LIKE THIS. this is what an AFC would think. I dont think like this most of the time. Its just sometimes..when i drink a bit too much...i feel like i am kidding myself and see these AFC thoughts

but anyways. thanks for the wake up call. I feel like i loose myself after i dont visit this site every week or so.

 

[Irs88]

I realized that I can work the best and be a dj when I am in an enviroment where i don't know anyone. When my friends are nearby. I get way to nervous to prove them that i can do it. especially around girls(friends) I know.

I dont really know why or how I should fix this, but I am a lot better when I am by myself...which is kinda sad...Is this just a stage in becoming a DJ or am i just plain different. eh.

 

[Taste]

Looks do not matter in the way you think. Women care about your sexual aura and grooming then your complexion. What i mean by sexual aura is your body language, confidence, expressions and how you sexualize yourself with your image.

Imagine if your brain was taking commands automatically with your thoughts and these where the commands:
I just cant help it. I read the book of pook, read all this other mystry stuff. I work out a lot. I went from a scrawny 110 short 5 8 weakling to a something 150 lb guy. Even with all that weight...all that change in confidence...i STILL cant talk to a girl straight on. I make stupid comments...get WAY to nervous. I get girls numbers but get way to scared to call them becuase I don't want to lose what I finally got...the acceptance from a girl, the feeling that im good enough. Im too much of a ***** to take that chance. Man...so many times...girls walked right past me. I am just so pissed of at myself.

It comes down to mindset. You are telling this **** to yourself. Thus you will only focus on the bad ****. I bet when something doesnt happen the way you expect it too, it'll **** up your entire night. I use to be like this too.

Change these little mind stories your playing in your head. You are a ****ing warrior now. You hold yourself up to the highest standard. You KNOW and FEEL 100x times better because deep down this is about changing your lifestyle. Which means it doesnt matter if you get rejected by one girl. Every rejection is making you the man you desire to be. It's INEVITABLE, your going to get the lifestyle you want. You are going to get all the girls you ever dreamed of. You are going to look back at this in 2 years time and think "holy **** what was i thinking..." Then you'll back to all the hotties you have around you.

But it takes a warrior. Every warrior has battle scars. Are you going to let a little cut, ruin what you have become right now?

Go into the battlefield.

 

[Irs88]

Thanks taste. I used to be a lot better with this headset. I lost it the past few weeks. I isolated myself from everything and stayed home all the time trying to put 100% into my workout regime.

But really man. that means a lot. I got to get my head straight.

 

[Irs88]

cancel