"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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I don't know what I am doing

SayWhat

Senior Don Juan
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Hi

I don't know if I like my girlfriend enough. If everything is going well, I don't care if I don't see her or not, I sometimes make something up to not see her so I can do something else I want to do more at that moment. But if we had a fight it's the complete way around, I want to see her because I'm afraid she will leave me, I feel like the ball is in her camp and try to be as sweet as possible to not upset her. I feel like I'm this nice guy who is afraid of everything. I feel down and not engage myself in any activities because I feel bad about our fight and I'm afraid she will leave me. If a few days pass and I feel all is normal again, I don't care again...

What should I do? I don't know if I love her. I like her, she's a fun person and I love spending time with her, but I guess just not enough?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Reckoning

Don Juan
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I've been where you are, except I was just bored to death of my 2 year long girlfriend, but she was cute and understanding and never gave me a hard time over anything. I guess it kind of sucks that we get bored with things just being all right.

The way I see it for you, man up and either enjoy life with her and stop sulking over petty things, or find a backup girlfriend and then break up.

Or do what I did, let the relationship die slowly until she initiates the breakup and you will agree and barely care, then proceed to behave like a dog who got off the chain as far as drinking and girls go.
 

sylvester the cat

Master Don Juan
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Youre talking about tension.

Tension is that feeling that makes think we are in love.

Tension comes from that sense of ambiguity. That not knowing if she quite likes you or not.

As you say when everything is well you don't care to see her because you know you have her. Guaranteed if she locked you off you would be pining for her.
 

El Payaso

Master Don Juan
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You sound like you have BPD. Might wanna get checked up.
 

SayWhat

Senior Don Juan
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Nov 21, 2012
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El Payaso said:
You sound like you have BPD. Might wanna get checked up.
Wow, looked at the symptoms of BPD, you might be right. Fck.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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