I blame my mother for making me into an AFC

[Fatality]

Growing up my mother always and I mean always told me to show nothing but respect to girls. She said to meet girls you should be a nice respectful gentleman. Then the other day I found out how my dad got my mother. In their 12th grade History class he would shoot rubber bands at her. It would embarrass her because when she was hit she would jump and the other kids would laugh. He would also tease her about things that she said kind of bothered her. If that's not disrespectful i don't know what is and here is this woman telling me to show nothing but respect and my own father would pretty much torture her. This is just an example that shows you should never take a woman's advice on how to get women. If I can't trust my own mother who can i trust?

Thanks alot mom

 

[Player_Supreme]

Ok blame ya moma for making you, but blame ya self for stayin one

 

[comic_relief]

I refuse to put blame on anyone but myself for listening to their bullsh!t.

 

[Elfynne]

I think there's a difference between disrespect and teasing. Most people are aware that teenage boys always tease girls they actually like. Usually it's just harmless fun. Disrespect would be more along the lines of physical abuse, degrading and harsh words, or sexual harassment. But teasing is usually never meant to be hurtful, it's just a way for a boy to get a girl's attention.

 

[Fatality]

Originally posted by Player_Supreme
but blame ya self for stayin one

I'm not

 

[Fatality]

Originally posted by Elfynne
I think there's a difference between disrespect and teasing. Most people are aware that teenage boys always tease girls they actually like. Usually it's just harmless fun. Disrespect would be more along the lines of physical abuse, degrading and harsh words, or sexual harassment. But teasing is usually never meant to be hurtful, it's just a way for a boy to get a girl's attention.

Ever been shot by a rubber band? It hurts. I did mention in the post that some of the things he said bothered her.

 

[joecollapoppa]

my advice yo u

Pop yo moms with a rubberband

 

[MacDiddy]

I don't think women are fully aware as to how they become attracted to someone else. They have these preconceptions in their mind of what the other guy needs to do in order for her to become attracted etc, but these are wish list stuff that run counter to what she's experienced. What girls experience in real life which lead them to be attracted in the first place is probably too embarrassing to tell of or too demeaning to encourage (eg. showing disrespect, throwing rubber bands at her, teasing and busting them). Coz either it states what a bimbo they are or that they are too easy. Your mums not gonna paint herself as a slut to give you awesome life benefitting advice.

Remember, women are not logical creatures. 1+1 does not equal 2. To them is might equal 3 or something else.

The only ones to blame is your source of influence, mentors and teachers as you were growing up. People who gave you wrong advice before you were wise enough to think for yourself and find this site. Blaming oneself only brings you down.

 

[Raptured Phoenix]

You dont need to BLAME anyone, you only need to realize that YOU are responsible for your own life. This includes how you choose to act, think, and feel.

 

[Seeph]

It would be easy for me to say that my mom was the reason I was once an AFC. She taught me the same things but she did it to try and make sure that I wouldnt end up on Cops for beating up my gf. If she had told me from a young age that girls love to be treated like ****, and for me to make fun of them and tease them every chance I get I would probably be a pretty ****ty person when it came to girls. But I realized that the world is not the same as it was when she was growing up, and that being a complete gentlemen doesn't work. So i fixed it.

 

[zerocelcius]

IS your father still around? If so talk to him about the whole thing. Never listen to women about women. OHH and by the way it isn't very respectfull to blame her... so your on the right track already.

 

[squirrels]

You know, a much better use of your time than sitting around placing blame would be to fix your problems.

Hating your parents for the way you live may be trendy among little high-school punks right now, but it won't get you anywhere in life or with women. Either way, it's no excuse for disrespect.

There seems to be this confusion about respect vs disrespect. Teasing is not disrespect. "Neg-hits" are not disrespect. Disrespect is dehumanizing and offensive.

Even Wild West outlaws like Billy the Kid were perfect gentlemen.

 

[Elfynne]

Originally posted by Seeph
It would be easy for me to say that my mom was the reason I was once an AFC. She taught me the same things but she did it to try and make sure that I wouldnt end up on Cops for beating up my gf. If she had told me from a young age that girls love to be treated like ****, and for me to make fun of them and tease them every chance I get I would probably be a pretty ****ty person when it came to girls. But I realized that the world is not the same as it was when she was growing up, and that being a complete gentlemen doesn't work. So i fixed it.

I don't know about other women, but if some guy hit me or treated me like $hit, I would be royally pissed off and I would either hit him or treat him like $hit right back. This last thing I would do is crawl back to him adoringly. I have too much pride for that.

 

[AMF]

Originally posted by Raptured Phoenix
You dont need to BLAME anyone, you only need to realize that YOU are responsible for your own life. This includes how you choose to act, think, and feel.

This statement is as much of a cop out as entirely blaming your upbringing.

I'm tired of this "take control of your own life" mock- cod- wacko-psycho babble! Unfortunately for members of this wishful-thinking school of thought, psychology shows beyond doubt that our parental relationships form our lasting model for all future relationships, and it takes extraordinarily significant secondary relationships - a profound, enduring, reciprocated "love" if you believe in that - to genuinely change the way we deal with emotion and with relationships.

Further, it has also been shown that genes "extract" confirming environments, thus the differential behaviour of people is often the CAUSE of differential parenting. Newborn babies have very different personalities; we are not a blank canvas. That means its possible you had genetic pre-disposition to "weakness" or over-sensitivity, which caused you to be treated and educated by your mother accordingly - "AFC".

I should add as an edit that I'm not advocating "giving up" on self-improvement. The enterprise has merit in its own right. But, if you spend youre social life moving from one obstacle to another, from feelings of hopelessness to a pit of despair, from failure to winner back to failure again, then it is truly ignorant to lay blame solely at the foot of "personal irresponsibility". Your endeavour may enact change, but you are likely to fall back into your old ways, until... you are... *whisper*... truly loved.

 

[Oxide]

oh whatever... so you gonna blame genes on sucking in life AFM, what a fvcking way of life!

"Oh wow, there is a girl that wants me, but naaaaaa, me genes tell me i suck with women".. right...


People change, and even in relationships, you dont go back to whatever the hell you were if you control yourself... yeah im in a realtionship, yeah im the same...

 

[Fatality]

Originally posted by squirrels
You know, a much better use of your time than sitting around placing blame would be to fix your problems.

That's why we're here isn't it? I don't hate my parents. i still say shooting rubber bands at someone is disrespectful. Especially seeing as how it hurts and it embarrases you in front of the class.

To whoever asked yes my dad is still around. He never told me anything about women.