"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Hugging

zekko

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I was reading that Carlos Xamos advocates greeting men with a handshake but greeting women with a hug. So I was wondering what people thought about this and if anybody does it? I'm not talking about old friends here, but rather casual or new acquaintances.

I think this may be a regional thing, maybe a west coast/east coast type of thing, because I hardly ever see this here in the midwest. There is a gay guy at work who regularly hugs all the women, and that works for him, but I think a heterosexual male attempting this would be looked at a little suspiciously, at least. I'm sure it's done in some places, but not here. Maybe it's an urban/rural thing, because I live in a small town.

My main problem with this is that I wouldn't mind hugging the attractive women, but I'm not so crazy about hugging the nastier ones. There is a 2 that often tries to hug on me, and I'm not too enthusiastic about it, honestly. I guess it's similar to the school of thought that you should kino everybody just for practice and because they might have a hot relative, but this isn't my thing.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Hughman

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Based on your culture I guess. Guys like me from the Med are perfectly happy to double-cheek kiss either gender (though I prefer women, hehe) You'd be lynched if you did that to one of the good ol' boys though.
 

Phenomenal One

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but I think a heterosexual male attempting this would be looked at a little suspiciously, at least.

I wouldn't mind hugging the attractive women, but I'm not so crazy about hugging the nastier ones.
you'd look suspiciously if you only hug the attractive woman.
i had the same problem and it has lead to people thinkin i like one woman over another and worse the least attractive woman thinkin i don't like her.
 

zekko

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Perry said:
are you reading secrets of the alpha male?
I read about half of it awhile back and got distracted, I need to get back to it. I can't say I agree with everything that's in there, but it's pretty solid. It's pretty consistent with the DJ Bible type of approach.

As for the hugging, it's really not me. Seems to me if you're a hugging type of guy you hug about everybody. I could very easily see that if you tried something like this at work the wrong woman might try to slap a sexual harrassment complaint against you, so it might be a little risky in the US. Like I said, I don't see this being done much where I'm at.

I'm a little skeptical about the whole "alpha male" idea too, for that matter. I can't think of anyone I know that really fits that description. There isn't any one person who is head and shoulders above everybody that everyone looks up to. It's not like a tribe of cavemen where one guy might be the leader. I can't think of any one guy who goes around dominating everybody that all the females will flock to. But I get the idea of a take charge attitude, being competent in your life, and not being ruled by your emotions.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Scar Tissue

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Dunno about other guys but iv never hugged a girl that I just met.

But hugging does seem to work well when you crack a joke on a girl hard and she gives you that pouty lip or shocked face. I go in for the hug usually. They will usually just stand their and act like they are too hurt to hug you back but you know they enjoy it.

Push/pull
 
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Scar Tissue said:
Dunno about other guys but iv never hugged a girl that I just met.

But hugging does seem to work well when you crack a joke on a girl hard and she gives you that pouty lip or shocked face. I go in for the hug usually. They will usually just stand their and act like they are too hurt to hug you back but you know they enjoy it.

Push/pull
Priceless, I promise.

First meet though, handshake is nice. We do hug everybody here we know though regardless of a 2 or a 10. Its the south. We are open to about anything in the south.
 
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