Considering the gaping span of time since my last tip/article, I felt I should throw another quarter into the fountain. 
For years, I've been observing this website and its members, sorting through the posts and trying to look at things from all sorts of points of view. But guys, it really all comes down to one thing. You want to be a better person? You have to literally have to center your life around it. It's one thing to think "Oh I need to say thank you to this guy's mom," but it's another to simply do it.
Habit IS the ultimate factor in determining your usual behavior. Humans are subject to human nature. Have you ever forgotten anything? Probably. Have you ever been unable to think about something consciously for an entire day when your mind wished to wander?
Say you need the light on after leaving work so the bacteria in your experiment will stay alive, but when you leave, you forget and turn it off. Whoops. Well, no big deal, you'll just start over. Then one day you realize how important it is to keep the bacteria alive for over a month, you may even cure cancer. Now you have to change your habit of turning the lights off, but if you just try to "keep it in mind" you will probably forget sooner or later, and that is harmful. So perhaps you have to put an alarm on the light that goes off when it's dark, or do something more rigorous than simply commiting it to memory.
It's the same principle, you realize that change is necessary/helpful, but if you just think "I need to do this" you will forget about it before it has its full effect and nothing will come out of it. If you REALLY want to change your life, you're going to have to start by changing your mindset and learning new habits. A great way to do this is writing a list. One thing that helped me tremendously was to write down everything I wanted to improve upon. Say I want better conversation skills. What are some things that make good conversation skills?
-Listening (really paying attention)
-Speaking clearly
-Humor
-Fluctuating your voice (monotone=bad)
-Relating to the other person
First, I can write these down on a list to keep track of what I'm working on (yes it involves work) which is much more helpful than trying to keep them in your head. I can sort them from most important to least important, and then go about solving them ONE AT A TIME. You will progress so much faster if you take each item and work on them one at a time. Why? Habit. It will become a habit because you'll be making the conscious effort to work on them, instead of thinking "oh I should try making a joke." Once one item is a habit, you can work on other things, and your problem will be solved or in much better shape.
How can you work on them? Let's take listening for example. You will most likely encounter multiple conversations a day, so finding a situation isn't hard (it becomes harder when dealing with approaching girls etc). When you do enter a conversation, think about listening. When the other person says something, listen to them. Think about what they're saying. What can you bring out that relates to it. What are they telling you with their body language? The list goes on. Focus on listening in every conversation. Do this every day, every conversation, until it becomes a habit. When it's a habit (don't tell me you don't have habits in conversation), you can cross it off the list and move on.
I can't exaggerate how much this method worked for me. If you wish to read about my own experience, keep reading, if not, skip this paragraph. A few years ago I suffered from mild to semi severe acne, mild social anxiety, and others. My first goal was to change my personal appearance. Starting with my skin, I searched all over the internet (great resource) and finally found a website that solved my problem. I stuck to their regimen, and to this day that problem is a thing of the past. Then I focused on my build. I purchased a bench press and some weights, and started working out. I made it a habit to workout, and crossed it off the list. Then I got to clothing. I found out what size I was and looked around for clothes I actually liked and didn't just think "this is a shirt, I'll wear it." I found clothes that I like and that fit me, and all was well. One thing I'd like to point out, if I may, if anyone tells you how you dress or present yourself is not important, it what's on the inside that matters, etc, they are wrong. Even if people make a conscious effort to overlook your appearance, they will still take notice of how you look and try to put it into terms they can understand and gather information about you from it. Anyway, I can tell you that changing my appearance was my first successful group of goals I managed to overcome. It works.
It may seem like an awful lot of work to just improve your speaking etc, but just try it, and when you see positive results I guarantee you will realize how valuable spending some time and energy really is.
Now, when the item to take care of requires something outside of your daily routine, you will need to account for it. If you don't approach girls but wish to meet more of them etc, you're going to have to do it. This is where you have to learn how valuable making the initial effort to change really is. By nature most people are shy (to an extent). You have to use logic and then start practicing, but keep in mind that the larger the goal, the more time/energy required, so don't expect immediate results.
Growing takes time and devotion.
For years, I've been observing this website and its members, sorting through the posts and trying to look at things from all sorts of points of view. But guys, it really all comes down to one thing. You want to be a better person? You have to literally have to center your life around it. It's one thing to think "Oh I need to say thank you to this guy's mom," but it's another to simply do it.
Habit IS the ultimate factor in determining your usual behavior. Humans are subject to human nature. Have you ever forgotten anything? Probably. Have you ever been unable to think about something consciously for an entire day when your mind wished to wander?
Say you need the light on after leaving work so the bacteria in your experiment will stay alive, but when you leave, you forget and turn it off. Whoops. Well, no big deal, you'll just start over. Then one day you realize how important it is to keep the bacteria alive for over a month, you may even cure cancer. Now you have to change your habit of turning the lights off, but if you just try to "keep it in mind" you will probably forget sooner or later, and that is harmful. So perhaps you have to put an alarm on the light that goes off when it's dark, or do something more rigorous than simply commiting it to memory.
It's the same principle, you realize that change is necessary/helpful, but if you just think "I need to do this" you will forget about it before it has its full effect and nothing will come out of it. If you REALLY want to change your life, you're going to have to start by changing your mindset and learning new habits. A great way to do this is writing a list. One thing that helped me tremendously was to write down everything I wanted to improve upon. Say I want better conversation skills. What are some things that make good conversation skills?
-Listening (really paying attention)
-Speaking clearly
-Humor
-Fluctuating your voice (monotone=bad)
-Relating to the other person
First, I can write these down on a list to keep track of what I'm working on (yes it involves work) which is much more helpful than trying to keep them in your head. I can sort them from most important to least important, and then go about solving them ONE AT A TIME. You will progress so much faster if you take each item and work on them one at a time. Why? Habit. It will become a habit because you'll be making the conscious effort to work on them, instead of thinking "oh I should try making a joke." Once one item is a habit, you can work on other things, and your problem will be solved or in much better shape.
How can you work on them? Let's take listening for example. You will most likely encounter multiple conversations a day, so finding a situation isn't hard (it becomes harder when dealing with approaching girls etc). When you do enter a conversation, think about listening. When the other person says something, listen to them. Think about what they're saying. What can you bring out that relates to it. What are they telling you with their body language? The list goes on. Focus on listening in every conversation. Do this every day, every conversation, until it becomes a habit. When it's a habit (don't tell me you don't have habits in conversation), you can cross it off the list and move on.
I can't exaggerate how much this method worked for me. If you wish to read about my own experience, keep reading, if not, skip this paragraph. A few years ago I suffered from mild to semi severe acne, mild social anxiety, and others. My first goal was to change my personal appearance. Starting with my skin, I searched all over the internet (great resource) and finally found a website that solved my problem. I stuck to their regimen, and to this day that problem is a thing of the past. Then I focused on my build. I purchased a bench press and some weights, and started working out. I made it a habit to workout, and crossed it off the list. Then I got to clothing. I found out what size I was and looked around for clothes I actually liked and didn't just think "this is a shirt, I'll wear it." I found clothes that I like and that fit me, and all was well. One thing I'd like to point out, if I may, if anyone tells you how you dress or present yourself is not important, it what's on the inside that matters, etc, they are wrong. Even if people make a conscious effort to overlook your appearance, they will still take notice of how you look and try to put it into terms they can understand and gather information about you from it. Anyway, I can tell you that changing my appearance was my first successful group of goals I managed to overcome. It works.
It may seem like an awful lot of work to just improve your speaking etc, but just try it, and when you see positive results I guarantee you will realize how valuable spending some time and energy really is.
Now, when the item to take care of requires something outside of your daily routine, you will need to account for it. If you don't approach girls but wish to meet more of them etc, you're going to have to do it. This is where you have to learn how valuable making the initial effort to change really is. By nature most people are shy (to an extent). You have to use logic and then start practicing, but keep in mind that the larger the goal, the more time/energy required, so don't expect immediate results.
Growing takes time and devotion.