"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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how'd I handle this?

Robert28

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so there's a girl i've known since about 2005 or so, we never dated but we did "talk" at onetime" just never hooked up or anything else. we were mainly just friends who would talk every now and then, hangout once in awhile, but we weren't what you'd consider "best buddies" by any means. she got a boyfriend about a year or so ago, might be longer can't really remember, don't really care. we still talked as we had before, nothing more then friends. anyways she got knocked up by this guy, who's a loser imo but that is irrelevent, and they have a kid on the way. so i hadn't talked to her in a month or so and i send her an email on facebook saying "hey, you forgot my birthday where's my present at heffer??haha". this was the kind of emails/texts/convos we would have, have had since 2005. we even had them the whole time her and this dude were dating, but like i said, it wasnt an all the time thing. i was no threat at all to this dude, or shouldn't have been anyways as i had no interest in her. well she replies back with "i know. listen, i don't think it's a good idea that we talk anymore. i have a boyfriend and i don't want anyone getting the wrong idea."

totally caught me off guard. i just replied back with "ok then" and left it at that. like i said, her and i have been friends since 05 and even the entire time while shes been dating this guy, nothings changed at all except she got knocked up a few months ago. this proves my point that guys should NOT be friends with girls, its only a convenience to them.

what makes it worse is the boyfriend emails me.lol this is what i got from him and what i replied with.

"Lets get something straight here buddy... The next time you text, message, or call my girlfriend, i'm going to drive to your place of residence and staple your f*cking face to your wall... Understand? Good, I hope so. It's in your best interest. If you have a problem, i'll be glad to give you my phone number...."

i honestly couldn't help but laugh out loud when i read that.haha to show what a big dumb@$$ he is, he could easily get my number from her but he didn't do it, he chose to email me on facebook instead.

here's my reply

"lol dude chill. i'm not hitting on your girlfriend or talking to her all the time behind your back. i've know her long before she met you, we're friends, never have been anything else. if you still want to fight me over that then that's cool. i think i have a staple gun around here somewhere you can use. you'll probably have to bring the staples though because i'm out. seriously though, all bull**** aside, you're freaking out over nothing."

never heard back from him, or her. how did i handle this situation you think? wonder what made her decide to write what she did?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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LE6END

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Rob, you're the guy who up and left the female who told you she'd been dating someone before you took her out. Since I read that, I've developed a great respect for you.

Now, it's because of this respect that I'm going to tell you this.

You sounded like a first class b.itch.

If he came at you aggressively, return that aggression, in a alternate variation. Apparently, he isn't frightened by you. Otherwise, He wouldn't challenge someone who intimidates him.

Upon reading your response, I immediately sensed an overly done effort on your part to sound unmoved by his threats. This fell flat, however. Lol's and passive statements. You even went as far to offer him equipment in assisting your a.ss beating.

I would've replied, "Hey d.ick head. In the case that you're dyslexic, i'll type this in caps:

[Home Address]

Of course, NO woman you DON'T own is worth fighting for. But if that's the case, you shouldn't have even replied. You didn't owe that guy an excuse or reason for contacting the girl. But, if you're going to reply at all, don't comfort the a.sshole. Keep him up at night; he's the insecure one. You don't have to provide him closure by telling him nothing was going on. He isn't your P/O.

It's obvious the girl either told him, or he has her account information and can access it. In the event that the first reason is true, then the girl clearly isn't your friend, and if she was---well, she isn't anymore. In the event of reason two, there was practically no way to avoid confrontation on his end, but you didn't have to entertain his anger.

Conclusively, I'd say he successfully completed the task he placed before himself. To monitor if you were a p.ussy. I know because if I had some male I didn't know contacting my girl, and I threw him aggression and it wasn't returned, I'd know he was a pushover. Even if you had no intentions to fight him, I wouldn't put up with ANY guy being comfortable with talking to me like that.
 

Robert28

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LE6END said:
Rob, you're the guy who up and left the female who told you she'd been dating someone before you took her out. Since I read that, I've developed a great respect for you.

Now, it's because of this respect that I'm going to tell you this.

You sounded like a first class b.itch.

If he came at you aggressively, return that aggression, in a alternate variation. Apparently, he isn't frightened by you. Otherwise, He wouldn't challenge someone who intimidates him.

Upon reading your response, I immediately sensed an overly done effort on your part to sound unmoved by his threats. This fell flat, however. Lol's and passive statements. You even went as far to offer him equipment in assisting your a.ss beating.

I would've replied, "Hey d.ick head. In the case that you're dyslexic, i'll type this in caps:

[Home Address]

Of course, NO woman you DON'T own is worth fighting for. But if that's the case, you shouldn't have even replied. You didn't owe that guy an excuse or reason for contacting the girl. But, if you're going to reply at all, don't comfort the a.sshole. Keep him up at night; he's the insecure one. You don't have to provide him closure by telling him nothing was going on. He isn't your P/O.

It's obvious the girl either told him, or he has her account information and can access it. In the event that the first reason is true, then the girl clearly isn't your friend, and if she was---well, she isn't anymore. In the event of reason two, there was practically no way to avoid confrontation on his end, but you didn't have to entertain his anger.

Conclusively, I'd say he successfully completed the task he placed before himself. To monitor if you were a p.ussy. I know because if I had some male I didn't know contacting my girl, and I threw him aggression and it wasn't returned, I'd know he was a pushover. Even if you had no intentions to fight him, I wouldn't put up with ANY guy being comfortable with talking to me like that.

yeah i see what you're saying, but my point was i honestly didn't care about what she said. i wasn't hurt by it, maybe confused because it was out of the blue, but not hurt. i got a full 8 hours of good sleep last night inspite of it. as far as he goes, well i've always lived by the rule that anyone can sound like the world's biggest badass behind a computer, but in person they are never the same "badass" they appear online/on the phone/ etc. I'm 30 years old, i have better things to do then argue back and forth over some girl i dont have feelings for. i believe that if he REALLY wanted to kick my ass he could have easily gotten my number from her, gotten directions to my house, gotten my blood type, my favorite color, all that ****. you said yourself that maybe she told him about me emailing her and calling her, maybe he hacked into her fbook. so why not take it a step further and find out how to contact me other then through email? i acctually did laugh at his email, hence why i replied with "smartassness" in mine. i defused his threat with using a staple gun to staple my face to the wall.lol or that was my intention anyways. what i didnt tell him was how she text me this past Christmas Eve asking me if i was single and if she left him would i date her.haha i never replied to her about that though. the thing is i know this girl better then he does and i know she will come back around, shes that type. not that im going to be her friend again, ill likely tell her to fvck off, but still. like i said though, i have learned that those who talk a big game, usually dont have the @$$ to back it up. if he really wanted me, he could find me. its not that hard.
 

pdx1138

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I would have replied the way you did Robert.

I don't see it as being a b!tch in any way.

You kept it funny and not giving a crud.

IMO the more aggressive suggestion is unnecessary.
 

Robert28

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pdx1138 said:
I would have replied the way you did Robert.

I don't see it as being a b!tch in any way.

You kept it funny and not giving a crud.

IMO the more aggressive suggestion is unnecessary.

well i mean they both live in VA now, i live in SC. it's not like that dumb b@stard is going to drive down here to fight me. i mean, hell, i can type a bunch of sh!t to some swole body builder that lives in California knowing good and well that it's highly unlikely that he's ever going to kick my @$$. now if he showed up to my house out of the blue, kicked my dog in the head, called my momma a wh0re, then we might have had us a situation. i just say let her live with that loser who spends his entire check in a weekend and doesnt have crap to show for it. she's the one thats got to raise a child with him, so thats her problem not mine.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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LE6END

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Either way Rob, you're still the man.


Leaving chicks in restaurants..... Classic.
 

Robert28

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LE6END said:
Either way Rob, you're still the man.


Leaving chicks in restaurants..... Classic.

lol thanks. havent gone on a date since then either.
 

The_411

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I like it, frankly because he's defusing a threat with humor and basically laughing it off. Of course not responding is probably the best way to deal with it but if you do reply this is the way to go. She'll probably read it and be laughing about it.
 

TheRedLion

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PUzzy response.

BACK THE F3ck off mother f1cker and stop stomping your chest, you really want to get your azz kicked ill meet you anywhere. you insecure bastard,

would have done the trick
 

PrettyBoyAJ

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If you like to avoid drama like me then just don't respond. He did say some disrespectful sh*t but one of the rules of being a mack is to not fight over a female.

If he said it in person it would be totally different though. Let the internet thug be internet thugs.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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TheRedLion

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i think a guy posturing and being disrespectful needs to be put in his place

most chimps that strike their chest do it for their women if they feel you will respond in kind and actually whoop them. they will think twice about it and will quit while trying to save face to their "women'
 

Robert28

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I thought I would post an update about this situation. First of all, I would like to say that while the email I sent wasnt "favored" by many of you, it worked exactly like I thought it would. His g/f emailed me today from one of her friends facebook accounts so he wouldn't see that she had sent me a message. I give you the following:

"hey its Laken. sorry about everything, Perry like flipped sh!t cause he saw i was texting u and then i told him u emailed me and he went nuts and told me not to talk to you , this is my firends facebook, so u can write me back on here if u want just dont email my page because he checks it. i hope ur doing ok and i wish i could talk to u, send me ur number and i can call u from work and stuff. anyways maybe ill get dont to SC and see ya soon ok. Bye!"

now, I haven't written her back, dunno if I will or not. like I said in an earlier post, she was just a friend and it was never a problem that we talked until recently. she told me to basically leave her alone and I said "ok" and then I get this today.lol
 

Mike32ct

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That first email saying that she had a bf and you shouldn't talk anymore probably didn't come from her. My gut feeling is that it was him pretending
to be her. Jealous/controlling bfs do that frequently. Trust me, he has her id and password.
 

WhitePimp

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I think you handled it fine. Probably should have just ignored it. This girl seems like more hassle than she's worth however, and I hope you ignore her from now on too.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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