How to get a girl to initiate calling and planning dates?

[TheTraveller]

So, I've seen this girl 4 times over the past 3 weeks, f-close and having a great time. She's up for my plans and we have fun together.

The kicker so far has been that I've had to initiate everything. How do I get her to open up and call me spontaneously out of the blue and plan a date instead of me doing all the work?

She's a little reserved, but nothing troubling. I'm just wondering how to do this in a way that doesn't come across as a needy wuss. I'd figure this will also translate to other areas of initiation from her side, too!

cheers,
-t

 

[Kailex]

You're the leader, so why would you want to shift the lead to her?
And if you were listening to her in the those 4 times, you probably would have had an idea now of things SHE likes.. because most of the times, they will drop hints of things they like to do or see and that's their way of saying: I want YOU to take ME there.

What worries me is that you've only seen her 4 times and you already want to hand the reigns over?

DON'T.

And if you want her to initiate contact, then stop contacting her for a few days... if she's interested, she'll get back to you.

I'm currently seeing someone who is reserved/conservative and we've gone out about 6 times and each time, the idea has been mine... why, because I'm leading. But I've picked up clues on stuff she would love to do and we've been doing it together. My last contact with her was on Monday when I called her and we talked for about 20 minutes. I didn't call her Tuesday/Wednesday and sure enough, she called me today, earlier this morning.

We date here and there, have a phonecall here and there, but I don't mind at all taking the initiative each and every time, because that's what I'm supposed to do... right, LEAD?

Remember, again, you've only seen her 4 times... just give it some time and she'll open up. Just be glad you've made it that far and that she still has fun with you. Don't try to move too fast by throwing the planning sessions on her. And if there is something that you plan and she doesn't like... TOUGH... she has her chances to tell you that she'd rather do something else.

And you'd be surprised sometimes at the things a girl would love to go with you to. You just tell them: "I'm going to X place, and you're coming with."

It's only been 3 weeks, just have fun with it and maybe eventually she'll open up and start calling you. She's female... trust me, she'll get to the point where she's calling you. Hell, I'll bet that if you still are seeing her in 3 months, you'll post here asking how to get her to stop calling/texting you.

 

[kingsam]

its amazing how many guys instantly stop doing the strong-male-characterists that got the girl at the start

your the man its your role to lead...

 

[In$tinct]

So, I've seen this girl 4 times over the past 3 weeks, f-close and having a great time. She's up for my plans and we have fun together.

The kicker so far has been that I've had to initiate everything. How do I get her to open up and call me spontaneously out of the blue and plan a date instead of me doing all the work?

She's a little reserved, but nothing troubling. I'm just wondering how to do this in a way that doesn't come across as a needy wuss. I'd figure this will also translate to other areas of initiation from her side, too!

cheers,
-t

I suggest you search "Anti-Dump's Machine", and read all Pook's threads about this. There is a lot of material to read through; but you will be better afterwards. You are on the right path now, by accedent it seems... LoL

Don't change tactics! If she isn't flaking on you, and you are in complete control, you are risking everything by changing now.

To living the good life
!
Cheers!

 

[thecurtainfalls]

You're the leader, so why would you want to shift the lead to her?
And if you were listening to her in the those 4 times, you probably would have had an idea now of things SHE likes.. because most of the times, they will drop hints of things they like to do or see and that's their way of saying: I want YOU to take ME there.

What worries me is that you've only seen her 4 times and you already want to hand the reigns over?

DON'T.

And if you want her to initiate contact, then stop contacting her for a few days... if she's interested, she'll get back to you.

I'm currently seeing someone who is reserved/conservative and we've gone out about 6 times and each time, the idea has been mine... why, because I'm leading. But I've picked up clues on stuff she would love to do and we've been doing it together. My last contact with her was on Monday when I called her and we talked for about 20 minutes. I didn't call her Tuesday/Wednesday and sure enough, she called me today, earlier this morning.

We date here and there, have a phonecall here and there, but I don't mind at all taking the initiative each and every time, because that's what I'm supposed to do... right, LEAD?

Remember, again, you've only seen her 4 times... just give it some time and she'll open up. Just be glad you've made it that far and that she still has fun with you. Don't try to move too fast by throwing the planning sessions on her. And if there is something that you plan and she doesn't like... TOUGH... she has her chances to tell you that she'd rather do something else.

And you'd be surprised sometimes at the things a girl would love to go with you to. You just tell them: "I'm going to X place, and you're coming with."

It's only been 3 weeks, just have fun with it and maybe eventually she'll open up and start calling you. She's female... trust me, she'll get to the point where she's calling you. Hell, I'll bet that if you still are seeing her in 3 months, you'll post here asking how to get her to stop calling/texting you.

The OP should read this over and over until he gets it. As In$tinct said, don't change tactics when something's working. Push beyond the comfort zone and continue to lead. I struggle with this myself but do realize how attractive a trait it is to a female who wants to be led/swept off her feet. It certainly will set you apart from the boys.

 

[Alle_Gory]

You don't. The closest chicks come to "initiating" is bugging you about where to take them or what to do. Either way, its up to you to lead.

Now as far as calling... she doesn't call you at all? That's messed up dude. How shy is this girl?

 

[Jay Dee]

Tell her to call you.