Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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How soon after a date do you ask for another?

johnnyrem

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I'm getting out more and trying to shed my AFC ways. In the past, I suspect I've asked for a followup date too soon, signaled too much interest that way, and got branded "desperate" by some women, which is a turnoff.

Anyway, went out with a really intelligent, attractive lady last weekend, had a good time, and at the end of the date, she said, "We should do this again sometime."

Now, the ball is in my court, I'm interested, but thanks to this forum I'm more conscious of some of the errors I must have made in the past. What do you guys base the timing of a followup date upon?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Wiesman44

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Just b/c you posted this question, I know you really want her. You dont have that much going on in your life and you thought u had a good date so you call her as quickly as possible to set up another date, right ?

Wrong ! Granted dont wait two weeks, but this is what i'd do.....

she said she wanted to hang out again right ? Test how interestd she really is. Call her at like 6:00 on Friday, right before she goes out. Say you've been sooo busy all week, and you know she probably has plans all weekend, but you want to hang out Saturday night.

Most of the dj's will scream at me for saying this, but its a mighty way to see really how willing she wants to hang out or if she just wants to blow smoke up your a$$. Be sure to be ****y and say you've got a busy schedule. See how ready and willing she is to squeeze you in. If it all works out, your good bro.
 

stalluproar

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When you think you have something solid, call her in a couple days and invite her to go to the store to pick a few things up (and make it sound like you need to go to the store). It sets the tone you already need to do something and you are asking her to join you. No dinner and no stress. If she declines, then just go out anyway (and the ball is in her court).
 

Austin3.8

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Originally posted by johnnyrem
"We should do this again sometime."
A good answer is "Yes we should, but you owe me a night out now. Call me when you get something set up."

Try to keep the ball out of your court as much as possible, make her chase you.

About calling her back, I call whenever I feel like it. There is no possible way to come off as desperate if you control the conversation and limit the length to just a few minutes.
 

DeathDealer

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Originally posted by Wiesman44
Just b/c you posted this question, I know you really want her. You dont have that much going on in your life and you thought u had a good date so you call her as quickly as possible to set up another date, right ?

Wrong ! Granted dont wait two weeks, but this is what i'd do.....

she said she wanted to hang out again right ? Test how interestd she really is. Call her at like 6:00 on Friday, right before she goes out. Say you've been sooo busy all week, and you know she probably has plans all weekend, but you want to hang out Saturday night.

Most of the dj's will scream at me for saying this, but its a mighty way to see really how willing she wants to hang out or if she just wants to blow smoke up your a$$. Be sure to be ****y and say you've got a busy schedule. See how ready and willing she is to squeeze you in. If it all works out, your good bro.
Silly rabbit, tricks are for kids.

Anyways,

Don't worry about appearing desperate or uncool, if a girl likes you she'll comply with your schedule.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Austin3.8

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Originally posted by DeathDealer
if a girl likes you she'll comply with your schedule.
This is so true, if a girl likes you, she helps you (think counter offer) If she doesn't she laughs as she watches you crash and burn.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Personally I feel that if you have your game on, she would be asking you.

Just my opinion.
 
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