Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

How sex affects a relationship?

1-2-3

Don Juan
Joined
Sep 5, 2002
Messages
109
Reaction score
0
My gf and I both have never had sex and we're 20. We've been going out for about 5 months and we both know that we both want it. I was wondering how sex can affect the relationship..negatives and positives.
 

stormwriter

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 3, 2003
Messages
239
Reaction score
0
Location
Portland, OR
Are you two religious?

If there's more to the story, let us know. Have you two talked about it? What's stopping you two?
 

1-2-3

Don Juan
Joined
Sep 5, 2002
Messages
109
Reaction score
0
THe only thing stopping is waiting for the birth control. We both know we want it and we've talked about it too. I just don't want someting bad to happen like a feeling like there's nothing left to wait for in the relationship. And the religious thing isn't a factor.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,494
Reaction score
64
Location
Galt's Gulch
Originally posted by 1-2-3
THe only thing stopping is waiting for the birth control. We both know we want it and we've talked about it too. I just don't want someting bad to happen like a feeling like there's nothing left to wait for in the relationship. And the religious thing isn't a factor.
Communication is the key. Do not be afraid to express what feels good and what does not and be receptive to suggestions from your partner. Stay away from the pornos for inspiration and stick to books like 'The Joy of Sex' to start with (then move up to the fun stuff.

Oh yeah, be diligent with the birth control. Unplanned pregnancy will definitely change the dynamics of the relationship.
 

chlywly

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 22, 2003
Messages
559
Reaction score
1
For all of your sexual needs, come to www.off-topic.net come to the vag ;)

Basicly its YOU that effect the relationship in a negative/posetive way not sex.

Sex can be used to bring you much closer together, Mind, body and soul, but for this you both must enjoy exploring, be trusting of eachother and Open to communication.

if both of you are not ready for sex and take it with a level of imaturity lack of knowledge and wisdom then sex can help sometimes RUIN a relationship, this is when its only based on hardcore taboo's and ****ing... If there is nothing more to your relationship then sex, or if it becomes all you do, then other aspects will crumble.

Sex is an extremely powerful tool to connect two beings together, a bond of energy, if you want to know GREAT sex check out Tantra, www.sivasakti.com

but basicly, communicate, expirement and learn your bodies, how they work what you like dislike :) Gotta start somewhere, it's a beautiful thing.
 

What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.

You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

LouieVaton Don

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 17, 2002
Messages
300
Reaction score
0
Age
43
Location
maryland
I dont think you have anything to worry about as the positives will definately outweigh the negatives. You get a chance to experience something special with your partner for the first time, no matter what happens you both will be responsible for breaking each other in. I guess it will truly be special. The only negative I can see here is if either one of you really enjoys sex so much that you figure your missing out banging with someone else.

Anyway what are ou waiting for you should go for it, it'll take your relationship to the next level.
 

Matt ala Casanova

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 18, 2002
Messages
682
Reaction score
3
Location
NH/MA
wow 5 months and no sex....oral sex must be getting old!

M.A.C.
 

Bungo Pony

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 4, 2001
Messages
2,572
Reaction score
1
Age
47
Location
Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada
Sex is like any other element of a relationship. Guys come on here, learn how to take the lead, initiate conversation, call the woman up for a date, decide on a day, time & location, etc. Sex is no different than any of these elements. The man should be in control of the sex, and let the woman know it (indirectly) by denying her sex occasionally. If a man takes control of the relationship in all aspects except sex, the woman will use sex to get the man to do whatever she wishes. I see this too often in relationships. The man should be the one leading the woman into the bedroom, not the other way around.

I'm guessing the both of you are virgins. I'd reccomend using the pill and condoms at the same time to prevent pregnancy. If the condom breaks, you have a backup. Since you've never had sex, it probably will be over quickly the first couple of times. Also, you may get preformance anxiety your first time. It's perfectly normal for things not to go smoothly the first time for a guy. Do your best not to get frustrated. If your gf is a good woman, she'll be patient with you.

Good luck!
 

Ronin I

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 8, 2003
Messages
714
Reaction score
0
Originally posted by Bungo Pony
If a man takes control of the relationship in all aspects except sex, the woman will use sex to get the man to do whatever she wishes.
This is such an excellent point it deserves to be repeated.
 
Top