"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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How much possible value does a girl add to your life?

KingofHearts

Don Juan
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So I've been seeing this girl for about 9 months now. Your welcome to look up my post history on how this relationship got started. Not the most romantic, but hey, I think things are as good as they can get now . Basically I've got a girl that will do anything for me. Is submissive inside and outside the bedroom. Pretty much nothing is off limits sexually. She is just a fraction of the crazy my ex-wife was. Its all good.

After being in a relationship this long, of course my eye wanders. No doubt I have options should I choose to go for it. I think every guy does if he's social enough and keen enough to detect IL. I haven't cheated or anything but i have confidence that I could and be forgiven. That's how good it is right now. This relationship has been the perfect combination of her submission and me knowing what I want. Looking back on my history with girls, I've certainly encountered similar girls. Slightly overweight, submissive, will do anything for a man. We've all seen them right? If I break up with my current girl, I could reproduce a similar relationship with another girl (or several) right away. Like clockwork. But for what? She hasn't f'd up. She's messed up unintentionally (gets clingy), but she hasn't done anything to screw me over.

So if all I'm looking for from women is sex, company and some occasional help (domestic or otherwise), then I've got it already. The one I'm with now seems to be ok with never getting married or having kids. Time will tell of course. If I go out and spin plates, then I'll just be looking for more of the same. As it is though, I don't spend enough time with the one I have.

At times I do get bored with my gf, I'm a restless person in general. I start to think maybe there's something better or different out there. I've broken up with her twice and just as quickly took her back. When I really analyze what I want, I realize that my girl can do it all. I think that maybe my search for something deeper from my gf is the same as guys who fck 50 girls and discover they're all pretty much the same (and kind of shallow). Girls can only add so much value to your life before they become a hindrance. Not that I'm looking to get married again soon, but I can see how Karma and other sosuave posters decided to get married for a second time. At some point, do you conclude this is as good as it gets?

So that's where I'm at. Not sure if I just plateaued with girls for now or if I actually maxed out. My girl is perfectly satisfactory. And I'm confident I could find another one to replace her should something happen. What else is there to women? Should I be content with what I got? Or is there more to women I'm missing out on? Is there another girl out there that could add more value or satisfy more needs to my life than what I've got now?
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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SgtSplacker

Master Don Juan
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You view your girl very objectively, maybe you don't really like her? Does your girl really engage you mentally and physically? If not then keep looking. You should definitely not consider getting serious with someone you can just tolerate. Find a woman that drives you crazy in whatever way you like to be driven crazy.
 

DavenJuan

Master Don Juan
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Girls can only add so much value to your life before they become a hindrance.
I think women/men/whomever only add as much VALUE to your life, as you are willing to let them add. A women should compliment your life, not be it

At some point, do you conclude this is as good as it gets?
I hope thats not the common mindset. To have given up, accepting complacency. I dont think thats Karma's, or hopefully any mens' destination

So that's where I'm at. Not sure if I just plateaued with girls for now or if I actually maxed out. My girl is perfectly satisfactory.
If you are okay with just satisfactory, then you are doing fine. At the same time, remember that there is always something ELSE out there. Something different. If you want to spend your life pursuing women thats fine. There is no right or wrong.

And I'm confident I could find another one to replace her should something happen. What else is there to women? Should I be content with what I got? Or is there more to women I'm missing out on?
you have to find VALUE in yourself before expecting others to add value in your life. Doesnt sound like you give women value at all. Just my perception from this post. Again, not a bad thing, there is no right or wrong. But no matter what relationship you have with women, you will ALWAYS be able to ask these questions. you have to decide at some point if what you have is WORTH sticking around.
 
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