how long do you wait to be official-is she using me-what is this , what is us, -my fr

[joe45]

i been going out with this girl like once a wk for 2 months approx we went out like around 12 times-movie, eat out, hang out, malls...etc i met off POF site. when i asked her to be bf/gf she told me "shes not sure, she doesn't now",and that her previous bf she knew him for one yr as just friend before she even committed with him-they were only bf/gf for a month though. how long would you as a guy or even a girl except some kind of committment -like after how many dates. i got a feeling it would have gone nowhere be it 2 months or 8 months . i don't want to keep on dating her and spending money and find out even after 1 month or even more that shes not even interested in being official. i want to be in a relationship. how long would you go for.

another thing is when we go to movie, eat out, i been paying the first couple of x's but a couple of x's i was little short on money and jsut paid my part for the dessert, i ordered my ice cream , and waited for her to buy her own ice cream. from what i observerved on her face-a frown-this frowned face happened right after she notice that i didn;t pay for her dessert. well i did pay for her dinner. i thought it would be nice if she just pay for my dessert too,but oh well i didn't except it. this happen a couple of x's.

another time we went to eat out i told her "i'll pay for the dinner and you pay for the tip", i paid for the 25 dollar meal and she put in 1 dollar tip. huh i thought that was cheap though. i didn't say anything. not once did she offer to pay or worst of all, she didn;t even say "thank you".
well i'm a easy going kind of guy,but who wants to be used right, if she doesn;t want to committ or be in a relationship then she should tell me upfront.

oh ya and how do you get the girl to offer to pay up sometimes or go 50/50 or do you u just tell them straight up
"hey i paid this time and next time you pay" somehting liek that

 

[Effington]

Personally, that's a big red flag to me. I hate that when girls expect the guy to pay, at least after 2 or 3 dates. During the initial meeting, I at least appreciate "the gesture" to pretend like they're willing to pay.

My recommendation would be to start suggesting cheaper dates. Cook dinner, watch a movie at your place. She should get the hint.

As for the "committment" thing...drop it. Are you hitting that? If you are, it's common courtesy for her not to sleep around, they have a word for those kind of girls. If you aren't, then I'd suggest you find other fish. She obviously is. [Doesn't mean you shouldn't still pursue her, of course]

 

[joe45]

Personally, that's a big red flag to me. I hate that when girls expect the guy to pay, at least after 2 or 3 dates. During the initial meeting, I at least appreciate "the gesture" to pretend like they're willing to pay.

My recommendation would be to start suggesting cheaper dates. Cook dinner, watch a movie at your place. She should get the hint.

As for the "committment" thing...drop it. Are you hitting that? If you are, it's common courtesy for her not to sleep around, they have a word for those kind of girls. If you aren't, then I'd suggest you find other fish. She obviously is. [Doesn't mean you shouldn't still pursue her, of course]

no i got no sex, and one of them didn;t even really like to kiss-when i kissed her she seemed to do nothing with her lips-oh and she has had previuos bfs too. when i asked her to cook me dinner she just laughed and said i only cook for bf, but when i ask her to be official shes unsure lol.

 

[AKA FLEX]

no i got no sex, and one of them didn;t even really like to kiss-when i kissed her she seemed to do nothing with her lips-oh and she has had previuos bfs too. when i asked her to cook me dinner she just laughed and said i only cook for bf, but when i ask her to be official shes unsure lol.

What did the barber say? "NEXT!"

Find a chick whose IL is about 3 or 4 times higher than this one.

 

[joe45]

after how many dates should i start telling her or any girl the mutual acceptance,
example-i pay for the movie and pop corn and you pay for dinner or vice versa or even the dutch thing.

i mean after 2 dates, after 3, . i figure she would at lteast offer to pay like after the 2nd date , i mean i'm not rich at all. i mean i still trying to save up for school if i have to , to get a better job and also a car.

after how many dates should u start expecting the girl to start offering to pay or even say "hey let me pay this time", you paid last time"

no i got no sex, and one of them didn;t even really like to kiss-when i kissed her she seemed to do nothing with her lips-oh and she has had previuos bfs too. when i asked her to cook me dinner she just laughed and said i only cook for bf, but when i ask her to be official shes unsure lol.

 

[KingBeef]

What did the barber say? "NEXT!"

ROFL!!! :crackup: :crackup:

 

[horaholic]

Dont have a relationship with this chick unless she is ACTING like she would be a good girlfriend, which she isn't. She sounds completely selfish, and not worthy of ANYTHING from you.

She should be offering to pay sometimes. You shouldn't have to ask.

What exactly has this chick ever done for you?? Have some pride and dump the chick. Tell her exactly why. And MAYBE, she'll turn around.

If you stay with this chick, you are a full on AFC.

 

[Alphamale1821]

you've taken this chick out on 12 dates and you ain't banged her yet.....she pouts when you make her pay for her own desert....Your being used bro NEXT!!!!!

 

[WC2]

Commitment rule #1 - The woman must want the relationship first and faremost before the man if it is to work out for the man.

Face reality. Men who ask for relationships before women are either inexperienced or no good chumps who never learn anything. Once a man asks for a relationship, the woman is automatically empowered with all the relationship duties. She decides how it goes, and when it ends. Why? Because after all you asked her and she knows that she can do whatever she wants without you dropping her.

Desperate Much?

Secondly, this girl IS using you. I can't think of a more picture perfect post that would depict a girl using you. Move on and start treating women with less sensuality and more firmness. Women use us for our soft side, while women WANT us for our harder side. This is why little pvssy boys are always paying for the meals, while the real men are out with the same women sealing the deals.