"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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how do you turn DOWN a woman, or not show interest?

realsmoothie

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Just a question I haven't seen addressed in the forum so far or in the Bible. I am 31 so I figured I'd ask it here and get some more mature responses.

How do you turn a woman down, or NOT show interest? I am not all that good with social stuff as of yet (though the last year has been 10 times better than any other, truth be told!), and I find that when a woman talks to me whom I find uninteresting, I go all rigid and downright unfriendly because I am scared of leading her into thinking I am interested.

So that's two questions. I know it seems like a silly question for a board aimed at picking UP women, but it seems to me like asking out and turning down are two sides to the same coin.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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KarmaSutra

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It can be an interesting conundrum to attract various women and have to actually turn down or dissuade their advances.

To answer question #1 How to turn down women with whom you have no interest: Well, you don't want to be a c0ck about it first and foremost. You never know if she has a hotter set of girlfriends. And she could be nuttier than elephant sh!t. Lots of unstable women not used to rejection.

#2 The formula I've used with much success is to totally go AFC on 'em if you want them to leave you alone. Follow them around closely, profess your unrequited love for them constantly, shower them with droll attention. Be THE wussbag piece of sh!t.

Works better than a voodoo charm.
 

WaterTiger

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Or she might have that LOW self esteem that makes her eat up the attention, and the "AFC from Hell" plan backfires, and she starts looking at Brides magazine.

Take the simple direct route. "You are like a sister to me." Trust me, this KILLS any hope of a boyfriend/girlfriend thing.
 

flexion_

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Unless you are sharing fluids with her then you aren't leading her on - don't worry. Talking to a women doesn't mean anything.

Thats a good problem to have anyway. :)
 

realsmoothie

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OK, good help, guys.

I guess I just need to work on seperating freindly eye contact and chatter from actual "flirting".
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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KarmaSutra

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WaterTiger said:
Or she might have that LOW self esteem that makes her eat up the attention, and the "AFC from Hell" plan backfires, and she starts looking at Brides magazine.

Take the simple direct route. "You are like a sister to me." Trust me, this KILLS any hope of a boyfriend/girlfriend thing.

If she had the " Low self esteem " she wouldn't approach him at all.

I stand by my suggestion.
 

realsmoothie

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Just thought about it... most of them are women with fairly decent self-esteem but are not hot. They're usually older or more feminist-types who are comfortable with being agressive anywhere they go. You wouldn't be able to afc them because they'd just accept it as meaning I was the sensative guy they think they've been looking for.

My town is full of women... so they HAVE to get agressive. :D
 
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