Master Cheif
Don Juan
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sounds like a stupid question i know but i have zero charm, im too direct and honest so being charming is very difficult for me
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
how do you become charming?
- Thread starter Master Cheif
- Start date
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Julius_Seizeher
Master Don Juan
Pook said it best, charm is treating women like little girls. Call her "shortypants" and the like.
But there is also a "magic" to charm, it's something you feel and she gets that feeling from you. It's hard to describe, loosely it's the sum of your presence: your sense of calm, being outwardly non-judgmental, relaxed and enjoying yourself.
Another strong factor of charm is salesmanship. Someone who is outgoing, engaged and interested in the lives of others would be said to be charming.
But there is also a "magic" to charm, it's something you feel and she gets that feeling from you. It's hard to describe, loosely it's the sum of your presence: your sense of calm, being outwardly non-judgmental, relaxed and enjoying yourself.
Another strong factor of charm is salesmanship. Someone who is outgoing, engaged and interested in the lives of others would be said to be charming.
Start watching reality TV shows, guy and girl dynamics are played out so well in those shows, when someones a douchebag, they say it, when someones a smooth talker, they say it. etc.. etc.. You WILL pick up the positive characteristics of people and how they act to portray those characteristics..
so whats funny and charming to you, may not be to the majority.
Unless you are extremely socially and around those type of situations you wont pick up on it, the next best thing, it to watch people, to pick up on it, and i'm suggesting all the cheesy reality challenge/dating/etc tv shows out nowadays.
so whats funny and charming to you, may not be to the majority.
Unless you are extremely socially and around those type of situations you wont pick up on it, the next best thing, it to watch people, to pick up on it, and i'm suggesting all the cheesy reality challenge/dating/etc tv shows out nowadays.
lynch1000s
Don Juan
- Joined
- Mar 4, 2005
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charm stems from confidence. When you project a confident aura, then women will find you more attractive then they otherwise would.
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Make the other person feel comfortable.
The most charming people I have ever met made sure I felt appreciated and better for being in their presence.
A salesman trying to get your wallet out of your pocket isn't ****y and funny. He isn't brutally honest. He is confident and focused on YOU. Anything involving money is tried and true. Follow it.
The most charming people I have ever met made sure I felt appreciated and better for being in their presence.
A salesman trying to get your wallet out of your pocket isn't ****y and funny. He isn't brutally honest. He is confident and focused on YOU. Anything involving money is tried and true. Follow it.
Alchemystic
Banned
- Joined
- Nov 10, 2010
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If you are charming women to get them for sex then you are doing it wrong.
Do not focus on becoming charming, instead focus on making the girl charm you.
Becoming charming just for a woman is not the way to go. If you try to charm a woman then you are putting yourself in the frame that you are trying to impress her. Impressing a woman is what you do when you think she is the prize. In other, words WRONG!
Change must first come from within.
Worrying about what others think of you is a bad habit.
Worrying whether or not a woman finds you charming or not will be the death of you.
Just relax dude. Let the woman worry whether or not she is even worthy to be with you.
If you still have doubts or insecurity, Just as yourself this question, "Was the frog charming?"
Why did the princess kiss the frog? Frogs are not charming.
Allen Thompson has dozens of articles about it.
P.S.
Being too direct and honest is a good thing when it comes to women. Use your directness/frankness as a qualifier/filter and as an alternative way to insult/neg - hits women.
Insults, neg - hits and brutal honesty are similar things. Use your brutal honesty, to brutally point out the negative flaws in a woman and knock her off her pedestal.
Bad Boys always insult women. Nice Guys are always losers in sex because they are too polite and boring.
Use brutal honesty to stir up a woman's emotions. Women love drama and variety.
Do not focus on becoming charming, instead focus on making the girl charm you.
Becoming charming just for a woman is not the way to go. If you try to charm a woman then you are putting yourself in the frame that you are trying to impress her. Impressing a woman is what you do when you think she is the prize. In other, words WRONG!
Change must first come from within.
Worrying about what others think of you is a bad habit.
Worrying whether or not a woman finds you charming or not will be the death of you.
Just relax dude. Let the woman worry whether or not she is even worthy to be with you.
If you still have doubts or insecurity, Just as yourself this question, "Was the frog charming?"
Why did the princess kiss the frog? Frogs are not charming.
Allen Thompson has dozens of articles about it.
P.S.
Being too direct and honest is a good thing when it comes to women. Use your directness/frankness as a qualifier/filter and as an alternative way to insult/neg - hits women.
Insults, neg - hits and brutal honesty are similar things. Use your brutal honesty, to brutally point out the negative flaws in a woman and knock her off her pedestal.
Bad Boys always insult women. Nice Guys are always losers in sex because they are too polite and boring.
Use brutal honesty to stir up a woman's emotions. Women love drama and variety.
Diaforetikos
Senior Don Juan
THIS!!
Learn to become that guy that everyone wants to be around. Younmust be very outgoing, and must be very confident around others.
I went to a party on Saturday, and by the end of the night, all the guys were talking to me, and all the girls were eyeing me.
I didn't do anything over the top. I said what I wanted to say. I did whatever I wanted, and I gave people value. I gave to them. I wasn't seeking any gratification or approval. I just focused on having fun with new people I have never met. I took the risk and the return was great.
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
I think this sums it up well.lynch1000s said:
In many ways, charm and charisma are about making other people feel good in your company, making them feel like they mean something to you. However, unless you're a valuable and confident man, your attention won't mean anything.
I can't explain exactly what charm or charisma is, but I know how I developed it:
1. I took the time to talk and see family and friends more than before.
2. I never turned away anyone who wanted to be friends
Once you start talking with so many different types of people you start to learn how to really talk with each one of them.
I remember a Pook post said you talk differently to your grandmother and your girlfriend. You could say "hey babe" to the girlfriend and it would be OK but say it to your grandmother and its fvcked up, because the words have a situational sexual connotation.
Likewise you can go even more specific, it doesn't apply to just women but everyone in general. 6 billion people we all have different interests, goals in life, pet peeves etc.. and each one of those people have a specific way to push their button, to make them feel excited and invested. The trick is you have to correctly gauge a person and you will know everything you need to know. But that only comes through experience.
1. I took the time to talk and see family and friends more than before.
2. I never turned away anyone who wanted to be friends
Once you start talking with so many different types of people you start to learn how to really talk with each one of them.
I remember a Pook post said you talk differently to your grandmother and your girlfriend. You could say "hey babe" to the girlfriend and it would be OK but say it to your grandmother and its fvcked up, because the words have a situational sexual connotation.
Likewise you can go even more specific, it doesn't apply to just women but everyone in general. 6 billion people we all have different interests, goals in life, pet peeves etc.. and each one of those people have a specific way to push their button, to make them feel excited and invested. The trick is you have to correctly gauge a person and you will know everything you need to know. But that only comes through experience.
lisahoney
Don Juan
Start by being yourself.Then think about what you might appreciate.
Even though it is kind of cheesy, a guy just recently got out of the car and opened it while I got out. This is almost NEVER done anymore so the fact that he did it and was sincere about it, scored big points with me.
Respect boundaries or have boundaries yourself. It is okay not to f%k on the 1st date.
Even if she is interested, it would show great charm and character to have some restraint and politely tell her you want to wait until things are more serious.
Just my opinion
Even though it is kind of cheesy, a guy just recently got out of the car and opened it while I got out. This is almost NEVER done anymore so the fact that he did it and was sincere about it, scored big points with me.
Respect boundaries or have boundaries yourself. It is okay not to f%k on the 1st date.
Even if she is interested, it would show great charm and character to have some restraint and politely tell her you want to wait until things are more serious.
Just my opinion
sodbuster
Master Don Juan
LISTEN to what people are saying. If you aren't listening, you don't care. You can be brutally honest with yourself and your boys,but not women[aren't built for it][be super diplomatic,they may think you are still too honest. Women are great at verbal hints]