"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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how could we/I have done better?

nfl sharp

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Just a little background info, I'm in college and kind of new to "the game". I was already using some of the basic concepts without knowing it, so I would be above your usual AFC, but not a dj like you guys on here. My friend and I have been reading the mystery method book, looking online, trying to improve ourselves and our game. Him and I are pretty much always going out to parties together winging (we are <21). We had kind of an odd night this weekend and I would like to get some feedback and advice on what we did well/wrong.

So we pregamed and then went to this party, made the rounds to see what floor had dancing, where the alcohol was, say hello to our friends etc. we both grabbed a drink and drank some (so the cup wouldnt be too full and spill on the dance floor). we hit the floor and saw two girls. my friend opened up beautifully, we had them interested in us asking us questions etc. we were all talking going smooth, then i said lets dance and we all started grinding. i was doing pretty good keeping the conversation going, her gay friend (not being derogatory, he was not into girls) came over and she kept dancing with me. not 100% sure how it was going for my friend but they were making out on the dance floor, then she left (i think for the bathroom?) and then came back around 5-10 mins later and went right back to grinding and making out with him. i was doing some kino and she seemed to like it but it didnt seem like she wanted to make out so i didnt go for it. 5-10 minutes later we all stopped dancing and the girls left with the gay guy so they could take the subway back to their apartment before the train shut down. my question is what could him or i have done better to close the deal? my friend gave the girl his number, we mentioned that we were gonna go back to our place after the party and drink/put some music on. my hunch is that they didn't want to abandon their friend or bring him with the four of us as a 5th wheel.

the party started to die down a little while later, we did ok with a group of three girls but they were already planning on going to the bar which we couldnt go to since we are 20 so we went back alone. then my friends texted his platonic female friend (who my friend introduced me to at the party) at my urging to come hang out with us and our other (guy friend). we all drank more, i eventually got her alone and made out with her. she ends up staying over at my place, sleeps in my bed, but we don't do anything below the waist. i ****ed up by getting too drunk for sure, i know i wasn't at my sharpest, we were also both pretty tired (about 4:30 am, too much booze made me tired). maybe i should have made a move but the making out was much heavier when we were fully clothed in the kitchen than it was in the bedroom and i didnt want to push too hard, she is just a young college girl kind of the cute/innocent type as far as i know. in the morning she left, gave her my number as we walked out (left my phone in my room unfortunately) and she initiated a kiss. i'm looking for advice on how to proceed since my friend could just give me her number, or i could wait for a text that may or may not ever come. also she left her earrings by my bed (on purpose?), so i would have an excuse as to why i got her number from my friend to text her. not sure if thats an afc play or not. Ideally I want this girl to be available to me whenever I want, maybe not to fvck right away but at least have for a backup plan, i don't want to just have sex one time and have it be over.

thanks in advance for the pointers.

edit: to clarify, the friend in my story is my apartment-mate so this chick knows i could easily obtain her number.
 
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"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Purefilth

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nfl sharp said:
Just a little background info, I'm in college and kind of new to "the game". I was already using some of the basic concepts without knowing it, so I would be above your usual AFC, but not a dj like you guys on here. My friend and I have been reading the mystery method book, looking online, trying to improve ourselves and our game. Him and I are pretty much always going out to parties together winging (we are <21). We had kind of an odd night this weekend and I would like to get some feedback and advice on what we did well/wrong.

So we pregamed and then went to this party, made the rounds to see what floor had dancing, where the alcohol was, say hello to our friends etc. we both grabbed a drink and drank some (so the cup wouldnt be too full and spill on the dance floor). we hit the floor and saw two girls. my friend opened up beautifully, we had them interested in us asking us questions etc. we were all talking going smooth, then i said lets dance and we all started grinding. i was doing pretty good keeping the conversation going, her gay friend (not being derogatory, he was not into girls) came over and she kept dancing with me. not 100% sure how it was going for my friend but they were making out on the dance floor, then she left (i think for the bathroom?) and then came back around 5-10 mins later and went right back to grinding and making out with him. i was doing some kino and she seemed to like it but it didnt seem like she wanted to make out so i didnt go for it.Just go for it, some girls don't give great IOI's and you will never know unless you make the move. 5-10 minutes later we all stopped dancing and the girls left with the gay guy so they could take the subway back to their apartment before the train shut down. my question is what could him or i have done better to close the deal? my friend gave the girl his number,Should've taken hers we mentioned that we were gonna go back to our place after the party and drink/put some music on. my hunch is that they didn't want to abandon their friend or bring him with the four of us as a 5th wheel.
You could've separated them a bit, and when they say -I need to get my friend - You say oh she's with my friend outside... Outside , where is she? Oh - my friend just text me they're on their way to our place for an 'afterparty', she says she'll see you there.... - Just an Idea...
the party started to die down a little while later, we did ok with a group of three girls but they were already planning on going to the bar which we couldnt go to since we are 20 so we went back alone. then my friends texted his platonic female friend (who my friend introduced me to at the party) at my urging to come hang out with us and our other (guy friend). we all drank more, i eventually got her alone and made out with her. she ends up staying over at my place, sleeps in my bed, but we don't do anything below the waist.IN YOUR BED AFTER MAKEOUT = 'I WANNA FVCK YOU!!!!!' Should make a move anyway - Even the nicest 'good girls' become highly receptive after a few drinks, and its down to the man to lead anyways Making out? slide your hand down her panties, she pulls it away? slide the other one down - Basically do whatever you like unless she stops you, says 'NO I dont want to' i ****ed up by getting too drunk for sure, i know i wasn't at my sharpest, we were also both pretty tired (about 4:30 am, too much booze made me tired). maybe i should have made a move but the making out was much heavier when we were fully clothed in the kitchen than it was in the bedroom and i didnt want to push too hard, she is just a young college girl kind of the cute/innocent type as far as i know. in the morning she left, gave her my number as we walked out (left my phone in my room unfortunately)Take her number and she initiated a kiss. i'm looking for advice on how to proceed since my friend could just give me her number, or i could wait for a text that may or may not ever come. also she left her earrings by my bed (on purpose?), so i would have an excuse as to why i got her number from my friend to text her. not sure if thats an afc play or not. Ideally I want this girl to be available to me whenever I want, maybe not to fvck right away but at least have for a backup plan, i don't want to just have sex one time and have it be over.

thanks in advance for the pointers.

edit: to clarify, the friend in my story is my apartment-mate so this chick knows i could easily obtain her number.
Simple thoughts - be more assertive - Lead, keep pushing and making a move until you get a definite rejection.

Take her number - instead of saying 'heres my number'. Take control - 'give me your number' works better then you can take either a definite rejection, or you have her number and don't have to worry about this wishy washy 'will she call me?' bullsh1t!

If you want her for svxytime at your beck&call, guess what? YOU HAVE TO HAVE SVX WITH HER FIRST, the only way is to do it and do it good!

My advice is for you to make the move - until you get the 'NO'. If you do give your number out, follow with 'whats your number then? so i Know who it is calling/ texting!'

You sound like you have some basics, since you can at least talk to girls/ get them to your room, unlike some guys here....
Thats all from me:D
 

nfl sharp

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thanks for the advice, much appreciated. i think your 100% right i should just be a little more assertive and make the move until a definite refusal is given. if i wasn't so drunk i probably would have made a move in the bed but sh** happens just need to learn from it and not go as hard on the booze next time.

we should absolutely work on separating the two. this could work especially well because a lot of times at parties the girls don't have their phones on them while dancing because they don't have pockets, so the only way to know what their friend was doing would be through me via my wing. great idea.

I did want to get her number but being half asleep i totally forgot my phone and didn't realize until i had already walked her to the entrance to my building. how should i proceed from here - wait for a text, or just get the number from friend and text her myself? she did leave her earrings...
 

Mike32ct

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I read in the first part that two guys grinded with chicks, but only one of them gets a makeout.

In that case, and actually any case, consider HOW the chick grinds with you. If she ONLY keeps her back to you (ie you only grind her back side), she clearly doesn't want to kiss you, let alone make out with you.

Grinding her back side is fine, but at some points in the "dance" try to turn her around to dance with you face to face. Face to face grinding is a much stronger IOI. Then you can be a better position to make out. If she won't let turn her to face you, dance for a bit longer, try to turn her again. If tgat doesn't work, cut your losses and move on.

One other thing you can do while you are grinding her back side is to plant a kiss on the back of her neck. If she's attracted to you, it will make her more wet. If she isn't, it won't do anything.

Using your own judgement and experience, have an objective. If you are reasonably sure you can pull her, keep the making out to a MINIMUM. The key is to leave her wanting more and send the unspoken message that "I want to do more with you, but this isn't the place."

If logistics are bad and/or you reasonably sure she's not going to leave with you, then you might as makeout hard because you probably won't see her again lol.
 

nfl sharp

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Mike32ct said:
I read in the first part that two guys grinded with chicks, but only one of them gets a makeout.

In that case, and actually any case, consider HOW the chick grinds with you. If she ONLY keeps her back to you (ie you only grind her back side), she clearly doesn't want to kiss you, let alone make out with you.

Grinding her back side is fine, but at some points in the "dance" try to turn her around to dance with you face to face. Face to face grinding is a much stronger IOI. Then you can be a better position to make out. If she won't let turn her to face you, dance for a bit longer, try to turn her again. If tgat doesn't work, cut your losses and move on.

One other thing you can do while you are grinding her back side is to plant a kiss on the back of her neck. If she's attracted to you, it will make her more wet. If she isn't, it won't do anything.

Using your own judgement and experience, have an objective. If you are reasonably sure you can pull her, keep the making out to a MINIMUM. The key is to leave her wanting more and send the unspoken message that "I want to do more with you, but this isn't the place."

If logistics are bad and/or you reasonably sure she's not going to leave with you, then you might as makeout hard because you probably won't see her again lol.
good tips, will turn the girl around myself next time instead of waiting for her to do it.

what about the other girl - get her # from my roommate and text her, or just wait for her text?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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