How come I'm never happy after events?

[Viper]

How come I'm never in a good mood after social events?

For some reason, I'm just never happy after events. For instance, there was a concert tonight for jazz band, orchestra and concert band tonight, but even though the performances were great and the concert band performance, which I played in, went pretty well, I still, just didn't feel happy at the end. It's like a regretful feeling like, I could've done better, also, I guess I just didn't want the night to end. I don't know how to describe it exactly, it's like, after the concert, I just start getting down. Part of the reason is because, I just never feel like I've impressed people around me enough and always feel as if people are looking down on me, even if I do a good job. Something else I've noticed, is that while watching the concert, I'm WAY to self-conscious of what other people might be thinking of me, instead of focusing on the music, I'm thinking, "What is X thinking about me? I hope I'm not staring or looking uncool or anything. I hope X doesn't think I'm weird or something for doing this.", I even try to tell myself how much of a badass I am and that I don't care to maybe stop worrying, but that doesn't work. I also seem to have a hard time remembering the music that has been played during the concert for some reason, it's like, I'll pay attention to the songs, but at the end of the night, I can't remember any of them, most likely because, I was more focused on what the people around me thought, instead of the music.

NOTE: X can usually be reffered to as, not one person, but all the people around me.

 

[Dante3214]

Uhm.. Yeah..


Sounds like you have social anxiety! (BUZZER RINGS!)


Yes, you can overcome it (without meds!), and it's a very common psychological disorder.


socialanxietysupport.com

 

[i am me]

take some time to relax yourself before an event. its all about getting loose so you feel more comfortable. u can do it by stretching, excercising, taking deep breaths, or wutever works for u

 

[oakraiderz2]

Dont get all offended, but why do you keep making post about your problems? Read the bible, get confidence, learn how to hold a conversation, and help yourself. People have giving you advice, but you dont apply it or connect anything. Seriously, when is this going to stop?

 

[Viper]

Originally posted by oakraiderz2
Dont get all offended, but why do you keep making post about your problems? Read the bible, get confidence, learn how to hold a conversation, and help yourself. People have giving you advice, but you dont apply it or connect anything. Seriously, when is this going to stop?

You don't exactly read anything either or else you would know that I HAVE already read the bible and it hasn't really helped. I can read over the DJ Bible several times and still, not have confidence. I notice that a lot of stuff in it isn't exactly aimed at High School kids, but to people who have already graduated High School and are DJing in the Real World. Besides the DJ Bible is huge, a lot of people don't have spare time to just "Read" the bible. If I don't POST about my problems, I most likely don't get help for those problem and they stay problems, because I have no idea how to fix them. And don't come into my topic complaining, if you don't like my topic, just don't post in it.

 

[tigre]

I have an idea, lets make a special section(for viper) on the dj bible on what to do when performing on a gayass bandconcert!!! jesus, just smoke a fvcking joint and chill the fvck out.

 

[08aisaac]

Don't use notebook paper. lol.

Anyway, I had/have the same problem.

Basically, you have to start thinking of it as a process.
Like, it doesn't happen instantly. Just because you know all the secrets, doesn't mean you are applying them. So seriously start applying things, slowly.
You can only walk, before you can run.
Take baby steps. Think of everything as success. And focus on something besides other people's opinions.
Do you think Bill Gates cares what other people think? Possibly, but probably not.
Because he's too busy running a business to give a ****.
That's my problem. I don't have anything to occupy my time, so I sit at home, every day, day in and out, doing nothing, and being pitiful for myself.

But I'm working on it, you should too.

 

[Nexxus]

Originally posted by 08aisaac
That's my problem. I don't have anything to occupy my time, so I sit at home, every day, day in and out, doing nothing, and being pitiful for myself.

But I'm working on it, you should too.

LOL :crackup:

 

[Viper]

Originally posted by tigre
I have an idea, lets make a special section(for viper) on the dj bible on what to do when performing on a gayass bandconcert!!! jesus, just smoke a fvcking joint and chill the fvck out.

Don't diss band dude. First of all, how would band be "gayass"? When there are actually a lot of good looking girls in the band? There's certainly nothing GAY about that. Maybe the problem here is, is that YOU'RE just gay. It's obvious you have no respect for music, so don't DISS it.

 

[Flabbergasped?]

If you're in a band, you can use it to your advantage. Set up a social event (dinner, get together at your house, something) and connect with your band members. Not only will it give you confidence, but you can connect with people who have something in common with you, and it's a lot of fun.

Remember, the key is to not give a crap. Sure, you might seem heartless, not caring what others think, but it's better for the long run; by being inependent and uncaring, you can achieve what YOU want, and not worry about what others wants from you.