Happy new year everyone.
This is a post about my recent attempts to get back in the game after a LTR breakup. I'd appreciate some advice and pointers.
I moved to a big city this year so have ample opportunities to meet women. I meet them in bars, coffee shops, evening classes, wherever. I'm often successful at getting fairly high initial interest, at least high enough for a number close, or follow-on immediate plans.
But I've been getting stuck taking it to the next level. This is a repeating pattern.
I'm usually more successful when I meet women through my social circle, but as I alluded to earlier, I moved away from home this year and don't yet have a big enough social circle to meet enough women through friends.
So here's my awful repeating pattern:
1. strike convo with girl
2. get number + arrange follow-up plans
3. meet, attempt kiss close
4. arrange follow-on plans
5. flake
Obviously the weak point is step 3. I'm not building enough attraction to keep their interest.
Tbh, I don't care for any of these girls. I just want to go out, have fun, and bang a few of them. So I think my problem is that I give off vibes of being a potential LTR (a habit I must have developed during my 3 year relationship), yet I'm fairly aggressive, by which I mean that I might be trying to kiss close too soon.
So I realise that a change of plan is needed. Maybe I need to forget about the kiss close + follow-up plans, and instead just focus on having longer dates then getting them to my place that same night.
Any thoughts?
This is a post about my recent attempts to get back in the game after a LTR breakup. I'd appreciate some advice and pointers.
I moved to a big city this year so have ample opportunities to meet women. I meet them in bars, coffee shops, evening classes, wherever. I'm often successful at getting fairly high initial interest, at least high enough for a number close, or follow-on immediate plans.
But I've been getting stuck taking it to the next level. This is a repeating pattern.
I'm usually more successful when I meet women through my social circle, but as I alluded to earlier, I moved away from home this year and don't yet have a big enough social circle to meet enough women through friends.
So here's my awful repeating pattern:
1. strike convo with girl
2. get number + arrange follow-up plans
3. meet, attempt kiss close
4. arrange follow-on plans
5. flake
Obviously the weak point is step 3. I'm not building enough attraction to keep their interest.
Tbh, I don't care for any of these girls. I just want to go out, have fun, and bang a few of them. So I think my problem is that I give off vibes of being a potential LTR (a habit I must have developed during my 3 year relationship), yet I'm fairly aggressive, by which I mean that I might be trying to kiss close too soon.
So I realise that a change of plan is needed. Maybe I need to forget about the kiss close + follow-up plans, and instead just focus on having longer dates then getting them to my place that same night.
Any thoughts?
