"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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High value among men

jhonny9546

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You go through failed relationships, struggles at work, health issues.
You start learning, building structure, fixing your mess.
You study people, social dynamics, work, women.
You might change career paths, go back to school.
You start surrounding yourself with high-value people.
You become the prize.
You learn to set boundaries.


You start questioning everything, your upbringing, your beliefs, even your sense of right and wrong.
What is value? Is it success? Popularity? Strength? Influence?


Have you ever truly stopped to ask what matters and what doesn’t?
Being aware of others’ behavior isn’t about judgment, it's about growth. Learn from people’s failures, but also seek out those who can teach you something good.


Yes, we must become people of value. But how, without a real-life example to guide us?
If we’re raised by unhealthy parents, we carry more baggage. So we search for better influences, and give less time to those who drain us.


I’ll never stop saying it: we need examples in real life.
How do we recognize those people
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Travel memoir21

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Yes external things like having a nice job, physique or social circle are opulent qualities. But at the end of the day, I think the most attractive qualities are the intangible qualities in a person is Emotional and Spiritual intelligence. If one has Emotional IQ, and spiritual IQ you'd want to keep that person around because you'd know he's a confident and non needy individual who regardless of the situation he's in, in life will ultimately bounce back from whatever crisis he's in and will be an around good guy person who inspires you to do good things in life.
 

jhonny9546

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Yes external things like having a nice job, physique or social circle are opulent qualities. But at the end of the day, I think the most attractive qualities are the intangible qualities in a person is Emotional and Spiritual intelligence. If one has Emotional IQ, and spiritual IQ you'd want to keep that person around because you'd know he's a confident and non needy individual who regardless of the situation he's in, in life will ultimately bounce back from whatever crisis he's in and will be an around good guy person who inspires you to do good things in life.
Even the priest at my parish has a very high emotional and spiritual IQ, yet I wouldn't take him as a role model.
It's really hard to find someone who has the whole package.
 

plumber

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You go through failed relationships, struggles at work, health issues.
You start learning, building structure, fixing your mess.
You study people, social dynamics, work, women.
You might change career paths, go back to school.
You start surrounding yourself with high-value people.
You become the prize.
You learn to set boundaries.


You start questioning everything, your upbringing, your beliefs, even your sense of right and wrong.
What is value? Is it success? Popularity? Strength? Influence?


Have you ever truly stopped to ask what matters and what doesn’t?
Being aware of others’ behavior isn’t about judgment, it's about growth. Learn from people’s failures, but also seek out those who can teach you something good.


Yes, we must become people of value. But how, without a real-life example to guide us?
If we’re raised by unhealthy parents, we carry more baggage. So we search for better influences, and give less time to those who drain us.


I’ll never stop saying it: we need examples in real life.
How do we recognize those people
when you are working on progress in something, and start making improvements the real life examples will only then appear. they will find you probably before you find them. its like this, few things are more enjoyable than teaching someone that respectfully wants to learn and has ALREADY demonstrated progress. a special type of good feeling occurs when someone makes progress because of your influence. teaching someone that has much ego or will not put in effort to improve feels like a waist of time, and it is. the simple way to tell who wants to improve is to see who is trying to do it themselves and perhaps making mistakes but still trying.

to find the good mentors, start working towards something and they will come.
 

jhonny9546

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the simple way to tell who wants to improve is to see who is trying to do it themselves and perhaps making mistakes but still trying.
When I started improving myself, everyone complimented me on who I was becoming... “You look better,” “You’re in great shape,” “You’ve changed,” and so on.
Then those same people split into two groups: the haters and the followers.


But at first, both groups will compliment you.
The followers are the ones who start picking up your habits, showing interest and curiosity.


But these are just ordinary people, not the mentors the post is talking about.
Those are still hard to find.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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plumber

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When I started improving myself, everyone complimented me on who I was becoming... “You look better,” “You’re in great shape,” “You’ve changed,” and so on.
Then those same people split into two groups: the haters and the followers.


But at first, both groups will compliment you.
The followers are the ones who start picking up your habits, showing interest and curiosity.


But these are just ordinary people, not the mentors the post is talking about.
Those are still hard to find.
keep improving. start helping others in the same way you want to be helped. the ones that still need to do what you already have done. the others will come, more patience. and... if they don't come, you gonna have alot of followers and probably the issue is already history.

within specific things, for example body building. if you really work at it, some others will be scared of the competition and others that are more cool will start giving you useful comments. other hobby and groups your in, same thing.

mmm... check out some service clubs if you have those in your area. going to find some real leaders that know what is going on in your area. then just help out, and help others to help out.

inventory your hobbies or skills and find something you would enjoy being very good at.
 

Gamisch

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There's a thread going om saying women have five faces. SO SHOULD YOU!!

You'll need different role models for different roles and purposes in life. And oftentimes for specific moments in life. Be fluid like water and adjust accordingly if needed.
 

Gamisch

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Most men live their lives of quite desperation, living pay check to pay check, with a harpy woman who has their balls in a purse, who never work out. I'm an engineer and according to the normal distribution, most people fall within the mean, to find "exceptions" you need to go to 2 sigma (or 3), which is 5% probability of finding what you are looking for.

Now imagine adding qualities like:

- Ambition
- Red pill aware
- Successful
- Socially savvy
- Game
- Life together
- Works out
- Healthy
- Financially well
- Masculine by definition

All of those are qualities that a population can have, and all of those have probabilities, if you add them up, and you wanna find a guy like that with all those qualities, well math tells you, for every quality, there is a 5% chance you will find it in a population.

Since we want the prob of finding a guy with all those qualities, we get: 5% to the power of 10 since they are 10 qualities, which is: 9.7 x10^-14 or 0.000000000000097.

There is saying "It is lonely at the top", because you have surpassed in value people who surround you. It was mean to be, just be happy being alone, you wanted the red pill, there is no turning back. Build from there.
I like ,or rather I LOVE your mindset. This is what a man sounds like when he has fallen down several times but never stopped being hyper ambitious.

The goals are set and we're going all in on success. No woman, friend, or even family member will be allowed to stunt that growth any longer.
 

jhonny9546

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going to find some real leaders
I mean, you can find those, but they all have different issues, like being real leaders, or financially successfull men, but they are childlike or have gossip issues, etc..
It's so hard to find the "GOOD" ones for real
  • Ambitious
  • Red pill aware
  • Successful
  • Socially skilled
  • Game
  • Has his life together
  • Works out
  • Healthy
  • Financially stable
  • Masculine by nature

So, I listed my current qualities.


0.000000000000097

Will women be able to recognize your value, or will they think you're "weird" simply because your value is so high they can't even categorize you?


It is lonely at the top

That's absolutely true, and when it comes to finding women on your same level, or at least, what you expect them to understand at what level you are, it feels almost impossible.
 
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