harrison9876
Don Juan
- Joined
- Aug 28, 2014
- Messages
- 121
- Reaction score
- 28
Hey guys...
Sooooo this is probably going to sound a bit pathetic.
Many years ago (before I got married), I was constantly social. Had a lot of friends, was invited to many parties, hangouts, get-togethers, etc. I FELT amazing. Dated some really hot women, and truly felt my groove.
After I got married, I withdrew. The marriage was terrible. I got sucked into something that felt like all that was me, was buried. My only focus ended up being work.
Since getting divorced, I have been trying to get that groove back...but it feels like I have been single for so damn LONG, that is all I know now.
Sure, I have been interested in women...tried online dating (which I find is really just a waste of time), asked women out, etc...but I feel just as withdrawn as I did when I was married...which really sucks. Though I am comfortable doing my own thing...it has been so long since I was really social, that loneliness is actually getting to me.
This entire year as been TERRIBLE in general. My dog was diagnosed with a brain tumor in Feb., which ended up with her needed constant care...my place was broken into and ransacked...was almost killed in a car accident...was stuck in the California fires and almost lost everything...my dog died.....lost my manager...got into an argument with my agent, which resulted in almost NO auditions all year...the list goes on - not a really fun year in a year when I was hoping to be getting back to my prime.
I started a new acting class in October, where students "generally" cycle in/out every 4 weeks. 4 weeks ago, this really cute girl started up. Chatted her up when I could, but the way the class is structured, there isn't a lot of social time. There is a bit of a cool connection there, but having a DAMN hard to expand on it, as I really don't "feel" good in general (a result of this years crappiness). She tends to choose me as a scene partner in class...but whenever an opportunity presents itself to get to know her (such a break during class), she is outside on her phone (go figure).
At the end of class (which would be an even better opportunity), these 2 guys are always hanging around her, orbiting, and chatting her up. I am sure they are just being friendly, but I do not feel the need/desire to jump in and be guy #3 in the circle.
There was a class Xmas get-together at a bar last week, which I 100% planned on going to. She was for sure going....but even if she wasn't, this would be a way for me to get back into my groove, and meet other people.
Go figure...like a symbol of my entire year...on my way to the event, another car enters my lane and hits my car from the side...completely writing off the rest of the evening, as I had to deal with police reports and insurance for 2 hours. BAH!
Last class of the year was yesterday...and it was the same routine, her choosing me to read with her/be her scene partner...but no chance to really hit her up...and when an opportunity made itself present after class...it was the same 2 guys orbiting around her.
It was a late class (ended at 11:30pm)...and I left class feeling pretty shytty. Not because of this girl...but because I feel soooooooo disconnected from people in general....and have NO CLUE how to get that back. I kept telling myself, as I was walking to my car, "dude...just GO BACK there...and hit her up...hit up/talk to other people...and SOCIALIZE FOR GODSSAKE!!"
But I did not listen to that voice.
I kept walking to my car...quite honestly feeling like a hopeless AFC...and angry at myself...which I know is not productive.
Curious if anyone else has felt the same...or been in a social rut that was difficult to get out of?
Sooooo this is probably going to sound a bit pathetic.
Many years ago (before I got married), I was constantly social. Had a lot of friends, was invited to many parties, hangouts, get-togethers, etc. I FELT amazing. Dated some really hot women, and truly felt my groove.
After I got married, I withdrew. The marriage was terrible. I got sucked into something that felt like all that was me, was buried. My only focus ended up being work.
Since getting divorced, I have been trying to get that groove back...but it feels like I have been single for so damn LONG, that is all I know now.
Sure, I have been interested in women...tried online dating (which I find is really just a waste of time), asked women out, etc...but I feel just as withdrawn as I did when I was married...which really sucks. Though I am comfortable doing my own thing...it has been so long since I was really social, that loneliness is actually getting to me.
This entire year as been TERRIBLE in general. My dog was diagnosed with a brain tumor in Feb., which ended up with her needed constant care...my place was broken into and ransacked...was almost killed in a car accident...was stuck in the California fires and almost lost everything...my dog died.....lost my manager...got into an argument with my agent, which resulted in almost NO auditions all year...the list goes on - not a really fun year in a year when I was hoping to be getting back to my prime.
I started a new acting class in October, where students "generally" cycle in/out every 4 weeks. 4 weeks ago, this really cute girl started up. Chatted her up when I could, but the way the class is structured, there isn't a lot of social time. There is a bit of a cool connection there, but having a DAMN hard to expand on it, as I really don't "feel" good in general (a result of this years crappiness). She tends to choose me as a scene partner in class...but whenever an opportunity presents itself to get to know her (such a break during class), she is outside on her phone (go figure).
At the end of class (which would be an even better opportunity), these 2 guys are always hanging around her, orbiting, and chatting her up. I am sure they are just being friendly, but I do not feel the need/desire to jump in and be guy #3 in the circle.
There was a class Xmas get-together at a bar last week, which I 100% planned on going to. She was for sure going....but even if she wasn't, this would be a way for me to get back into my groove, and meet other people.
Go figure...like a symbol of my entire year...on my way to the event, another car enters my lane and hits my car from the side...completely writing off the rest of the evening, as I had to deal with police reports and insurance for 2 hours. BAH!
Last class of the year was yesterday...and it was the same routine, her choosing me to read with her/be her scene partner...but no chance to really hit her up...and when an opportunity made itself present after class...it was the same 2 guys orbiting around her.
It was a late class (ended at 11:30pm)...and I left class feeling pretty shytty. Not because of this girl...but because I feel soooooooo disconnected from people in general....and have NO CLUE how to get that back. I kept telling myself, as I was walking to my car, "dude...just GO BACK there...and hit her up...hit up/talk to other people...and SOCIALIZE FOR GODSSAKE!!"
But I did not listen to that voice.
I kept walking to my car...quite honestly feeling like a hopeless AFC...and angry at myself...which I know is not productive.
Curious if anyone else has felt the same...or been in a social rut that was difficult to get out of?
