Got Partially Rejected. What's going on?

[ChaoticGamer]

Hello DJs reading this post

This simply put might just be a case of one-itis, But let me tell you about it..

As I have been posting lately, I've been obsessing over a girl who CONFESSED her love to me, and so I decided to move closer to her, to her same city, to see If we can work something out. Before this can happen I have to do several things... and in the meantime I visited her, after not having seen her for a long time....
We dated during the time I was there, and wow, never felt so in love, and that's the problem because "loser boy" took over, now I'm so paranoid...

Anyways last night, Here's what happened:

We were chatting, and I felt distance, Even though she said she loves, she needs me, she's so happy to talk to me, etc, etc, I have the gut feeling that I came to strong, and that something is Wrong.

She said it wasn't the right time to chat, and that She HAD TO GO to Sleep urgently, because she was SO Tired. so I agreed and left.

But this morning I go and check my facebook, and see that she was online until 3 am this morning posting pictures. She lied to me basically

I feel so... needy now... as If I'm losing the "girl of my dreams" you know how this is.... and I don't wanna mess this up, She says: "Nothing is wrong" and insists that she Truly loves me, bla, bla...

I feel I Need to confront Her about her Lying to me.
But I just need your advice. What should I do?

Is she testing me? or What is she thinking? I feel we have a common scenario here. By the way She said "she's kind of scared about me giving up everything I know for her." (many times) and that's weird because prior to my visit she was soooo excited.

Please HELP ME !
Please!

 

[DJDamage]

Your post reeks of insecurity and oneitis diarrhea.

You were never rejected, big fvcking deal if she wanted to go on facebook and not speak to you on the phone that night. Your main concern is how she acts with you when you are with her.

Be careful of obssessing with this girl or any girl for that matter otherwise they will lose interest in you.

 

[ChaoticGamer]

You're so right,
I wish there was medication for this condition. I just feel this chemical flowing inside my chest that makes me do stupid irrational things. And I feel so pathetic, and sorry for myself because some time ago... she used to be the one chasing me, and BEGGING for my love, or even FriendShip. when I threatened to leave her / forget about her forever, she would come supplicating, but now, as a Loser that I have become, have turned the things around.

Wish there was a cure.

Anyways,
Hope to read more comments about it.

Thanks and Best Regards

 

[DonJuan11]

Hello DJs reading this post

This simply put might just be a case of one-itis, But let me tell you about it..

As I have been posting lately, I've been obsessing over a girl who CONFESSED her love to me, and so I decided to move closer to her, to her same city, to see If we can work something out. Before this can happen I have to do several things... and in the meantime I visited her, after not having seen her for a long time....
We dated during the time I was there, and wow, never felt so in love, and that's the problem because "loser boy" took over, now I'm so paranoid...

Anyways last night, Here's what happened:

We were chatting, and I felt distance, Even though she said she loves, she needs me, she's so happy to talk to me, etc, etc, I have the gut feeling that I came to strong, and that something is Wrong.

She said it wasn't the right time to chat, and that She HAD TO GO to Sleep urgently, because she was SO Tired. so I agreed and left.

But this morning I go and check my facebook, and see that she was online until 3 am this morning posting pictures. She lied to me basically

I feel so... needy now... as If I'm losing the "girl of my dreams" you know how this is.... and I don't wanna mess this up, She says: "Nothing is wrong" and insists that she Truly loves me, bla, bla...

Why are you asking a girl if anything is wrong? NEVER ask a girl that. That's like asking "Are you sure I have enough game to keep you sexually interested?"

I feel I Need to confront Her about her Lying to me.
But I just need your advice. What should I do?

Confront a girl for being on facebook after she told you she was tired and just wanted you to go home? Are you crazy?

"I saw you on facebook until 3 am that night! Why did the hell did you lie to me and say you were tired and just wanted to go sleep so I went home? If you're not tired I expect you to have sex with me, not lie to me and send me home. From now on NEVER EVER lie to me under any circumstance."

That won't make her knees week.

Is she testing me? or What is she thinking? I feel we have a common scenario here. By the way She said "she's kind of scared about me giving up everything I know for her." (many times) and that's weird because prior to my visit she was soooo excited.

She is thinking she wants to be on facebook with her friends instead of giving you sex. Take it easy and just make sure she has fun when she's with you. That's your only goal when you are with a woman, MAKING SURE SHE HAS FUN.

 

[ChaoticGamer]

It takes a strong frame of mind to act as you have suggested.

I believe what you're talking about is what mystery calls 'The Ghost' or - being emotionally impervious to vibes from other ppl (girls especially)

How do I convert myself into this ghost is the Question. What Inner game knowledge will lead to that powerful state of mind ?

Considering what just happened in my case I know that confronting her is a bad idea, the worst idea. I appreciate the advice ! however... I'd like to know WHY is it that she lied to me ? I think one or two powerful DJs here maybe able to tell me the reasons for this behavior.

And... What kinda things: Make a Girl's knees weak ?

Best Regards,

CG

 

[pipe007]

you need some tough love here boy!
I think you already know what your mistakes were, but sometimes people need other's to point them out so you can now have evidence....

for god's sakes women react on emotions, before she was eating out of your hand because you were doing things that caused her to want to be more close to you, want you etc....

like you said NEEDINESS AND INSECUIRITY are your biggest enemies with women, so from now on make it your goal to eliminate those and work on self confidence... period.

from today on STOP COMPLETELY:
-being paranoid about her feelings for you , or worse asking her
- calling her often to see how she is doing
- reacting to her emotionally, react to yourself, inside, BUT NOT TO HER
-if you cant stop getting jealous insecure at the fact that she is getting distant, then nobody here can help you, just force yourself to let go.... in your mind, let go, decide you will spend no more energy on trying to get her to feel attracted to you,,, you just wont do anything.... and watch what happens...

slooowly she will start wondering why you are being distant, and SHE will start doing all the dumb things you are doing rite now, that is a woman's job, she should always be the one wondering, if she is not, your game is not where it needs to be, and you might lose fast.. you will eventually get dumped or cheated on if you continue this pattern..... WE MEAN IT!!!!!!

 

[ChaoticGamer]

Pipe,
Your advice is taken with high importance to me.
Like you said, I think I need to hear it from someone else as a way to have the will to take it as an order, and stick to it, and follow it no matter What.

One more question; Every time I read or find out she's been giving others more attention than me, I feel miserable... What should I think about in moments of extreme weakness like this ? Because it's obvious that even though she says she has no time for anything or anyone; she still manages to spend a little of her time, to at least post a stupid comment on facebook...
And when I find out, I feel miserable, because then it comes the lame excuse.... and I feel like s*** !

What should I think about when this happens? I want a mantra or something.

CG

 

[pipe007]

it seems that you have been in this site for a long time now since 2006, I believe that you have read many articles in the DJ bible, but eventually you go back to your old self and forget them, you should slowly get yourself to read them again, that should help a lot....

anyways I was in your situation with a girl a while ago, at the begining she called me, wanted to see me, she made plans for us to go out, always called me at night, and i felt in control and the man, of course i loved it and had oneitis for her....

then as time went by, i went out to her to parties, i saw that she would make conversation with others guys and i started to develop insecurities in myself,,, I tried to keep my cool, we can do that but like you said, it gets to a point that the emotions take over and you react to them in a way that you become clingy and needy

ohh baby, are you ok? are you mad at me lately? why are you changing, I feel you are so distant now? I want to see you, can I see you today? just one minute? NO? you cant seeme today? whyy, before you wanted to see me all the time, now you are beeing distant, ( she gets pissed and tells me to STOP, she gets frustrated at me and hangs up the phone) i feel more and more needy and call her again and again, only to have her become more and more distant....

then i said ENOUGH!!!! i've had it, i let goooo, i dont need her or this, i deserve better, and i dropped it, completely let go, i dont care if she calls me or not, i dont care if she is talking to someone else, from that moment, i stoped calling her, asking her if she was losing interest in me, and how she was feeling, i stoped completely a week after, she calls me everyday, like 10 times a day,,, no lie,,,, she set up a date 3 days ago so we can meep up and have crazy sex, she wants to see me now, she feels happy, she calls me baby, honey, and says she misses me wants me........

this is a big AHA for me, now i get it.... just keep doing what works, never go back to the mistakes you are making...

 

[DonJuan11]

It takes a strong frame of mind to act as you have suggested.

I believe what you're talking about is what mystery calls 'The Ghost' or - being emotionally impervious to vibes from other ppl (girls especially)

How do I convert myself into this ghost is the Question. What Inner game knowledge will lead to that powerful state of mind ?

I don't know who or what mystery is, but to answer your question, as mentioned many times here and in the Bible, you have to focus on improving yourself, educating yourself, making yourself a better person, learning a language, studying art, becoming ripped, becoming a doctor, building a building, etc, etc, etc. Once you focus on these aspects of life, whether or not a girl you like in on facebook one night until 3 am instead of making sweet love to you won't bother you.

Considering what just happened in my case I know that confronting her is a bad idea, the worst idea. I appreciate the advice ! however... I'd like to know WHY is it that she lied to me ? I think one or two powerful DJs here maybe able to tell me the reasons for this behavior.

Again, your ego seems very high and fragile by you being so concerned with that question. She lied to you because she didn't want to talk to anymore, she was tired, she wanted to see her friends on facebook, she didn't want to have sex that moment, she didn't feel like entertaining you, she wasn't in the mood for sex, etc, etc, etc. What difference does it make why she lied to you? She just didn't want to spend that night with you. You are not husband and wife, she doesn't owe you anything.

I'm certain she wouldn't have lied to you if you said "I know this awesome Salsa dance club where we can get in the VIP section. Put on your dress, we're going salsa dancing."

And... What kinda things: Make a Girl's knees weak ?

Last question is a loaded question that has been discussed several times over. Hint: it's not one or two or three things. It's an overall state of mind.

 

[ChaoticGamer]

Hi there pipe !

It's so hard, but I believe it's worth the sacrifice.

I think you may know HOW hard it is, and right now, I need all the help I can get, and for that I give you thanks.

Actually, right now I feel like s*** again, WHY? because I've been working all day and have just arrived home; and I see she's been online, (through facebook of course), And What exactly is the problem you may ask...
The problem is that prior to the mistakes I made, She used to log in into Google talk at least an hour a day Just so she could talk to me, and be uber-romantic. Now, after these mistakes... She hasn't logged into GTalk at aLL these past few DAYS...
But I come home where I can check that damn facebook and...I see that she has been online! and commenting on stupidities, and just ignoring me.

and man, It's Killing me !

Just Tell me what To do... I'll do it no matter what !
I can't bear this feeling anymore.

CG

 

[pipe007]

there is nothing you can do today to fix this situation, or to make yourself feel better... you just have the wrong mindset,

there is no line or technique that can fix this problem....

it takes effort in your part its going to take a week probly of no contacting her... even if you feel like dying...

let her contact you at least 3 times before you contact her once....
give space
GIVE HER THE GIFT OF MISSING YOU
if she doesnt miss you or has the need to hear from you, you wont create it by calling her.... just next her in your mind for now, but dont tell her, just disappear for a while, IF SHE FREAKING DOESNT COME BACK TO YOU.... then THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO ANYWAY.. she lost interest

but if she appreciates who you are and you have some value in her eyes, this will definitely increase her attraction for you... ONCE SHE CONTACTS YOU.. dont go all wussy and start callling her and acting like an emotional girly man,, keep your distance, finish phone calls first from now on.... tell her you will call her back later and do....

act like a man,,,, man it up , grab your balls man,, its ok to be a man

 

[pipe007]

or if you want a quick fix, go call her 5 times till she picks up the phone and tell her you miss her, so she gives you lil attention because she feels sorry for you... this will lead you to feel at peace and better about yourself, and will make her feel that you are a girly man, and lose the lil attraction that she might have left....

prepare to have her even more distant,,,, if you do this though. you only want to call her to MAKE YOURSELF FEEL BETTER....

 

[ChaoticGamer]

pipe,

I promise you this... I will follow your advice even If I have to die.
I will not contact HER, I will not remember her, I will no longer care for her ! I will focus on my guitar, and my other girl-friends, Hell, I have just talked with a hot female friend of mine and had a Great time, and realized I'm suffering for nothing... And I just talked to her(my friend), remembered the good times, and just by doing something so simple, I recovered my manhood.
I won't make this pathetic mistake Again, EVER !

I need to read something that will help me, suggest something quick,

Thanks FOR ALL THE ADVICE !

You guys Rock !

 

[pipe007]

im glad to see you will take action and not just read advice, good for you... take the advice and use it.... from men that have already been in your shoes.... take the advice because it works!

and MOST IMPORTANTLY... let me know how it worked for you within a week in this same thread, id like to see how you managed to turn the tables around and have her chasing you instead.....

 

[ChaoticGamer]

Sure pipe! I'll do that !

If there's any other thing you need to add please let me know, I want to pull this off in the best way; I mean there's probably something else that can be done during this process, that, as you said has worked in the past...for someone else. I want to get rid of this problem, once and for all.

Thanks for all the help,

CG

 

[playerone]

Crap. Just listen to DonJuan11. He said everything that's needed.

+1

 

[Kevin Feng]

Women lie all the time, get used to it. It's just their way of protecting themselves and more importantly ****-testing you.

You remind me a lot of one of my close friends that was willing to move place to place fora girl and honestly, that's not going to get her.

Right now you've given her all the power in the relationship, she knows that she can have you whenever she wants and because of that, she can brush you off. Don't give her that kind of power.

I would highly recommend you check out the Art of Seduction. Also, it sounds like your new to the game, ABC's of Attraction just released a new e-book that can definitely help with this problem.

You need to step it up and be the authority figure in this situation, don't let this girl walk all over you.

-Kevin

 

[ChaoticGamer]

I'm usually good at attracting women, whenever my emotions don't start to mess myself up. I've lived many cases of success, the problem is, even though I've read and applied a lot of material, I've fallen into a trap because never before a girl came so strong about her feelings for me, and you know the damage that causes. I've seen many characters on movies that actually know how to handle this situation fine, I wonder If Han Solo is a good role model ?
If at all I can be helped in this particular situation, I'd like to know If there's a way to recover that power I lost? I've already been hinted at what to do, but since others have intervened in my post, I thought it wouldn't hurt if you guys added something more.

Is art of seduction a book by Richard 'Gambler' LaRuina ?

Thanks once more!

CG