Gosh, I'm such a **** up!

[JCKey618]

Ok, my girlfriend is a freshman and I'm a junior in high school (2 year difference) and we hooked up yesterday. I wasn't able to spend any time alone with her today, at all!

Ok, at lunch she was playing and horsing around with her freshman friends and I feel a little too old for this and I dont really know her friends, so I couldn't spend time with her then.

The only plus for today was that I kissed her for the first time in the hallway before class. We were about to get into it when one of her freshman friends say us, yelled out something, and Lauren got embarrassed and stopped.

Ok, after school, I'm thinking, it's our time. BUT NO!!!!! We walk down this hill with like 10 freshmen and they are doing the whole horsing around thing and I feel so out of place. So, like a dumbass, I walk down the hill real quiet, with a stern look on my face. Lauren didn't even seem to notice, it was like I didn't even exist. For a few minutes I was even walking several feet ahead of the group (including Lauren) because I didn't feel like waiting when they all stopped for something.

When I see other couples after school, they walk with just eachother. I want it like that.

Ok, when we get to our train stop, I thought it was just going to be us, but no again, one of her loud-mouth friends get off too and some freshman boy. I was expecting to spend time with Lauren at the train stop like we have done before, but before I knew it she was saying bye and gave me a goodbye hug. It was quick and short and her ***** ass friend said something like "Y'all suck, no kiss or nothing." But Lauren did say something like "We did enough of that earlier" (she said it in a good way).

So, here I am, like 10 minutes later and I feel stupid and really bad. Also, my mom invited one of my friends over without me even knowing so I can't make plans with Lauren this weekend. What the heck can I do now, or have I really messed up?

I'm thinking of calling her. The next time I do talk to her, should I apologize for me dull behavior and say I was not feeling well or something?

 

[M2k961]

Dude, if that was me I would tell her off. One minute she's walking with you, and the next she forgets you're around? What the hell is that? From the way you're describing it, you don't have overexposure with this girl, so it's not like she just needs time alone.

What would you be apologizing for anyway? Not playing around with girls you don't know?

M2k

 

[JCKey618]

But I want to spend time with her. Should I call her just to see what's she's doing tonight or something? I think she said she's going somewhere and maybe I can meet her there or something.

 

[M2k961]

That's your call. I would try to meet up and see if she does the same thing.

It does'nt seem like this girl is too interested in you. But what do I know..

 

[Smooth as Anything]

Maybe she's trying to show you that she is popular among her freshmen friends.

As a freshmen I'd imagine she doesn't have 1/100th of the social proof you have.

...just a thought.

 

[Cogent Ops.]

Why are you trying to spend all of your time at school with this girl? If she is hanging out with her friends, and you dont like them, why dont you just tell her you will see her later and go hang out with your own friends?

About the kissing... I dont usually kiss girls in the hall because I dont like having ****loads of people watching me and yelling about how we need to get a room or something.

All the things you are talking about can and should be done at a later time after school on a date. Dont worry about kissing her or being alone with her at school.

If you really want to be alone with her so much, you should tell her you want to talk alone with her somewhere for awhile, but if youre doing this all the time she will think you are lame and annoying.

So she left at the train station to go hang out with some friends or something? Who cares? It's not like shes obligated to spend all of her time alone with you.

Also, dont start thinking you are too old and mature to goof around and have fun. I'm a junior and I am pretty damn mature, but I still do alot of horseplay with my buddies. Maybe you should just try talking to her friends. Ive found that once you get past all stereotypes and assumptions, most highschool kids have alot in common. Even if they are freshmen.

It does'nt seem like this girl is too interested in you.

Maybe. Or maybe hes just too interested in her.

 

[Cogent Ops.]

"Gosh"?

 

[JCKey618]

I gave in and called! I didn''t mention it at first, but somewhere along the lines I told her that I was in a bad mood today. She said that she kinda figured that and she has a knack for telling when people are in bad moods and she tends to stray away from messing with them while they are in that bad mood.

I asked her about some stuff and made the topic sexual, asking about her fantasies and telling her the things I could do (I was very vague, just in case she's scared off by talks of sex and whatnot. I think she borke up with her last BF because her wanted some ass) to her.

I just need some advice on school. At lunch I usually eat with my friends and she doesn't eat lunch so she would be upstairs in the gym. One of my friends said "Don't you go with her? Should''t you be with her then?" And a thought occured to me: I don't want to be one of those couples that never spend time together and act like they are scared to be together, but I don't want to be following her all over the school.

What should I do? Always have her looking for me, or me looking for her sometimes? Also, should I try to walk with her everytime I see her in the hall or just a quick touch or something to acknowledge her?

 

[blienk]

Most couples in my high school would walk with each other between classes, asumming the classes were reasonably close together.

If you had the same lunch period, I'd say it makes sense to eat with her but otherwise don't worry about it. You shouldn't be changing your schedule to be around her every minute. Just chill with her when it's convenient and don't worry about it when it's not.

 

[MVPlaya]

Talk to your mom and tell her not to schedule anything for you without telling you.

Now, about your girl... she's a bit younger so she's not exactly on the same level as you. However, you should be confident and not seek to have this Hollywood romance by forcing it. Be assertive, but not desperate.

 

[JCKey618]

Hmm, I really see the errors of my ways. Do you guys think this is fixible? When talking to her yesterday I asked her if we could hang out and she said maybe because her friend was spending the weekend with her and if we do hang out, it would have to be the three of us.

She called (according to my caller ID) at 11 pm last night and I was sleep and must've missed it. If she calls today and saying she can hang out, should I say I've already made other plans? Or go hang out?

I don't plan on calling her now till Monday.

I'mma be perfectly honest with you guys. I think I've come off as desperate too many times. These are the mistakes I've think I've made:

1. I told her I didn't think we spent any alone time that day.

2. I told her that being around her made me feel good.

3. She told me how her and two friends were going out for Halloween last night and I basically tried to invite myself. I kept thinking, don't invite yourself, don't invite yourself, so I tried bringing up stuff casually to get her to invite me and in the end she was like "Why, you plan on coming up here or something?" She said we couldn't because around her neighborhood everything gets spread around and all the neighbors told about how they saw Lauren when she was with her last boyfriend to her mom. Lame excuse, but hey, what can I do.

4. Then I asked what she was doing today and if she wanted to hang out.

5. (This should go at the top of the list) I called her when I should have let her call me.

Do you think I have to try extra hard at fixing stuff or should I just act like I have a clean slate and treat her likem I should have from the beginning?

 

[JCKey618]

WARNING!!!! WARNING!!!! DUMB IDEA COMING YOUR WAY!!!

What if I tell her I was high or something last nightand don't even remember talking to her? Because when I was talking to her, I was just saying random stuff and kid of mumbling, so maybe she'll believe it...? She told me that last weekend she got drunk, so she probably wouldn't look at me getting high as bad....

Anyway, at my school, the DJ's are usually weed-heads also.


END OF STUPID IDEA!

 

[blienk]

Originally posted by JCKey618
WARNING!!!! WARNING!!!! DUMB IDEA COMING YOUR WAY!!!

What if I tell her I was high or something last nightand don't even remember talking to her? Because when I was talking to her, I was just saying random stuff and kid of mumbling, so maybe she'll believe it...? She told me that last weekend she got drunk, so she probably wouldn't look at me getting high as bad....

Anyway, at my school, the DJ's are usually weed-heads also.


END OF STUPID IDEA!

I don't think this is really necessary...It's pretty hard to "fix" things that you have already done. I suggest you just forget everything that already happened and just start doing things right.

 

[drixsa]

you are already ***** whipped and she doesnt even know it yet

listen to yourself *****

"i want to call her"

"i want to make out with her"

"i want a cookie"

dont suffocate the girl

dont tell her your feelings, espically if she doesnt ask

just reading your posts i can see that you havebecome a bit of a tool and wishy washy know that this girl is stuck in your head

dont go have lunch with her, stay with your friends, your GF will be there later

keep the time short and sweet

the begining of a relationship is like looking at a new wrapped B-day present

if u tear it open right away it looses some of its appeal b/c u know whats inside

shes gonna walk with her friends every day and thats fine

she shouldnt change her plans just to accomidate YOU

another thing is that you dont know this girl very well, mabe a week or so since youve been postin all this shiat about her right>?

and now you are dating her...?

your looking for a GF to solve your problems

id love to talk more about this in detail with u, if u would like... send me a PM

 

[JCKey618]

She just called me a while ago and we talked for like an hour. After I got off, I remembered the rule about talingon the phone too long. I wasn't planning on calling her today, so what do I do when she calls. Do I still keep the convo short?

 

[DJ Alejandro]

Cummon man! Get a life! Do something you’re great at! (basketball, soccer or hit the gym!) Don’t force the situation, k?! look man, I’ll be honest with ya, I cant really see if she has this high interest in you.. for now. But you can change that. That’s the essence of being a DJ. I got myself in the same situation before and I can say that even if im not yet a master, getting into this site really helped me a lot. It should help you too. And it will.

First of all, id like to say that yes, it’s a healthy thing that you have admitted to becoming a needy guy. And it s*cks! I remember the time when I was dating this girl two years older than me. Yup. That’s two damn years older but not necessarily more mature.

You know what happened in the end? Yeah, she dumped me. I wanted to blame her and I did for a while until I realized that I was the one to blame for everything. I was very needy and wanted to be with her as in like… all the time. This is the most difficult part to overcome. What you should do is hang-out with your friends again. And then show her that you can still have fun even if youre not with her. Im not saying that you should break up with her. What im trying to say is that I feel that her interest level in you isn’t really in par with yours. Hang-out with your friends and SHOW her the guy that really attracted her in the 1st place. Remember, a DJ doesn’t need a woman to be happy. She’s just a bonus to spice things up.

Yeah, Ive been having the same problem these past few days but im gradually getting “busy” so the convo becomes shorter but as another DJ here that I respect said to keep it short and sweet. Simple. Just make sure that whenever you talk, make sure she has a grand time with you getting c&f on her. And then you still have to do something… (like picking up other girlz! Hehe) this should make her think likewise of choosing her friends and missing the company of how a great guy you really are! like what I said, do something youre great at. And maybe you could ‘unconsciously’ let her see you talking to a few girl friends. This should make her a bit more competitive for your EXCLUSIVE attention.

Man, she’s taking you for granted and don’t allow that! Maybe next time she neglects you for her friends like as if you didn’t exist, do what I do. Just walk away. No buts. Just walk away. You don’t wanna *** off as someone needy who has nothing better to do than just be seen by people as someone who cant stick up for yourself. If she really does have a knack for this thing, expect that she’s gonna be chasing you for a while. Wanting to know why you just left. And when you does ‘finally’ reach you, im not sure how you should put it but if I were in your place, id tell her that I have better things to do than be her ‘back-up’ company like the way she’s been treating you. just a suggestion, anyway.

I guess what im trying to say is that.. GIVE HER THE GIFT OF MISSING YOU. Shes gonna miss the attention you gave her before that you should be giving to other girls to make her a little competitive. Remember, you ARE the prize. Not the consolation. Make her work for your attention! Not the other way around.