Going to the Bar Alone?

[ENIGMA16]

I know there have been a few threads on this before, but I was wondering if some people could provide me with some links to the most helpful ones or post some good info on doing this. I've gone to bars/parties by myself a few times and it usually amounted to me feeling nervous and out of place and not talking to anyone before leaving.

Surprisingly though this happens more often at bars; at parties I generally have little or no problem. Maybe it's because a party is an exclusive event so when I'm invited to one even if I only know one person I feel like I can relate to everyone else, whereas at a bar everyone seems to just go with their friends and stick in their own groups.

Also I've been getting a lot more comfortable with talking to strangers at bars when I'm out with friends, but I'm not sure if that would carry over to going out alone. I guess I just don't really know what to do; I go to the bar, get a beer and sit there not knowing where to go from there. So I end up sitting there like that for a while before I get fed up and leave.

Bah, maybe I just need to set a requirement that I need to go out twice a week to a bar alone and be there for at least an hour; that'd probably force me to do something.

But yeah I know there's been a ton of info posted on this forum about that and so any links or tips would be appreciated.

 

[Demonicale]

I find that when i'm in a situation where i won't have any friends for backup and that i'm in a bar all alone i do a few things.

1.RELAX take everything in slow motion .. this to me makes me more calm and i'm able to come off as confident aswell ..

2.Chat to the barmaids, atleast your then speaking to someone rather than being there doing nothing.

3.Try to just talk to stangers.

Basically it's not an easy thing to do if your use to going out with friends and going out on your own is new ... it's gonna be a bumpy ride, but it becomes easier everytime..

Best of luck!

 

[COD]

u can try the arm wrestle tip.

Dude, you basically have to get used to approaching groups, U can use the old classic........."YA my friends are spose ta meet me here later" if asked who are you here with........but in reality that almost never comes up.

Stick to the bar, hanging out by the girls washroom just screams creepy.

You just need cool openers.........I tried the PUMA (pickup magic attraction)......had some fun doing the monkey dance/hey check this out B.S. I am not a fan of using props, but the BITE OUT QUARTER TRICK has gotten me laid a time or two. Best 8 bucks I ever spent.

U can wear a cool Tee shirt with something clever like "NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR THE OIL SPILL" or I solved the oil leakage problem, tell your boobs to stop starring at my eyes, etc, etc..............humor has a way of making people approach you. Again I am not a huge fan of props but hey lets face it they do work.........initially.

PICKUP LINES-ummm theres way too many to post, the key here is not the line itself, its what you say or do AFTER THE PU LINE.

You SHOULD HAVE some default openers, try to stay away from negs, C & F as MOST people are having trouble mastering them (both online and in person)........again this is a skill and requires the correct ratio.

You shoud also know what to say if you get the old "hey buy me a drink" line from chics, I have used "hey how about you give me a kiss first and if you are any good, we can talk about drinks........are U a good kisser, lets see, miss all talk, actions speak volumes".

You need to blend in as well as standout. Blend in, I mean act as if you belong, to avoid looking like the loner, creepy guy, then stand out, with your confidence, humor, smile, openers, avatar, etc.......skip the fury hat with goggles though.

You may also try being a wing for other men standing around........this instant wing tactic makes friends instantly. It's basically where you play matchmaker, cept you also game chics for yourself.........totally fun.

If you don't mind props, heck there are so many that rock........the camera with a huge, long lens has seen its fair share of skin.

You must keep the mental frame that its all for fun, your there to create fun, have a good time, etc. Don't over-think stuff and make us proud by posting your experience on here.

 

[Captain]

You are feeling nervous because you are pushing out of your comfort zone. The more you do this, the less nervous you will get.