"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Give me tips please

Somedude_UK_31

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Hey,

There's a cute girl at work that walks by my desk a good 3-4 times weekly. We never talked, she's always walking by pretty quickly.

I have no issues with her being a co-worker, my company has more than 7000 people in the complex and there's no policy against dating at work.

Could someone please walk me through how to stop her and what to say? I just can't think of how to start. First step is how to stop her while she's walking by my desk without looking like she's passing through a checkpoint and I'm a guard :D

My goal is to eventually take her out to lunch.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Purefilth

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next time she walks past, say
"you dropped something!"
she turns and says "what?"
"my jaw"
*then start dribbling*
Hah! im joking! DO NOT try that!

do you know her name?
just say "hey HB! where are we going for lunch?" then offer a choice of 2 places...

either you get a lunch date, or you establish a low - no interest, and move on bro
 

roman81

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Say hello, then look her in the eye and smile, ask her how she is.....
 

Chamber36

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Roman's advice is pretty solid.

I would just strike up some casual conversation. You can talk about something work-related too. Ask her some questions. Lead the conversation. You know what the goal is.
 

Purefilth

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roman81 said:
Say hello, then look her in the eye and smile, ask her how she is.....
1)establish eye contact
2)smile
3)speak

4)*if eye contact cannot be established, trip her up and teabag her while she cries:crackup: *

NB only do 4 if you want to get fired/ sued/ never have her talk to you
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Somedude_UK_31

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I never talked to her before. I will do as you recommended and say hi and introduce myself and say we should do lunch sometime.

I might be jumping ahead of myself but tell me this please. Assuming we go to lunch (I have a feeling we will), when and how do I ask for hanging out outside of work hours? like movies, dinner.
I'm mostly interested in WHEN. Do I mention during lunch? on another day?...etc.
 

Purefilth

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Babysteps bro, get lunch first. After that, if you still approve of her arrange a date with her.
 

SamTheHobit

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Ask her if she wants to be your gf.
 

Greasy Pig

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Just say: "Excuse me, I'll have a coffee thanks. White with two", while holding out your coffee cup and a serious look on your face.

Shock and awe! Then put on your biggest smile and a twinkle in your eye. Tell her you're only joking and introduce yourself. Go from there.

The look on her face will be priceless and anything is better than just dryly introducing yourself.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Somedude_UK_31

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OK I did it and we are gonna go have lunch together next week.

I have some questions please:
1. Do I keep the convo during lunch work related? (she works at a different department)
2. How and when to ask her out outside of work hours, maybe to the movies...etc.?

Thanks DJs
 

-Gripz-

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Somedude_UK_31 said:
OK I did it and we are gonna go have lunch together next week.

I have some questions please:
1. Do I keep the convo during lunch work related? (she works at a different department)
2. How and when to ask her out outside of work hours, maybe to the movies...etc.?

Thanks DJs
Good work on getting her to go to lunch with you, but you're over analyzing things a little too much man. Just play it cool and lead the convo. It doesn't necessarily have to be work related. Also I think you should ask her out again as soon as you can, as they say strike when the iron is hot!
 

Chamber36

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-Gripz- said:
Good work on getting her to go to lunch with you, but you're over analyzing things a little too much man. Just play it cool and lead the convo. It doesn't necessarily have to be work related. Also I think you should ask her out again as soon as you can, as they say strike when the iron is hot!
I would talk about anything that she likes talking about. Concerning work, I might ask whether she likes doing whatever she does at work. Getting her to tell you how she feels about stuff will bring you a long way. She will probably think you're a good listener too, if you ask those sorts of questions.

But I would just ask her whatever interests you about her. If you are curious about the department where she works you could ask a few questions about it, it all depends how she feels about her work. If she's excited about it you can ask a lot of questions, but if she finds it rather mundane then talk about something more interesting.

I would try and get her to open up on where she's from, where she lives, who she lives with. About her life basically. You can ask her about where she grew up, and her basic likes and dislikes.
 

Somedude_UK_31

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Thanks for the tips but no one has answered my 2nd question:
2. How and when to ask her out outside of work hours, maybe to the movies...etc.?

Basically I wanna know do I mention it while we out for lunch or some other time? I hope one of you have had an experience with this!
 

Greasy Pig

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I've read here that you should never set up a second date while on the first date.

I'd just enjoy lunch, let her do most of the talking, then leave it a couple of days before asking her out for a drink. Personally, I wouldn't recommend a movie.
Do something active and fun where you can interact with her and escalate using kino.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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Purefilth

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bowling / crazy golf = good for kino.
a few days after your lunchdate, say
"hey hb, how do you fancy bowling/crazygolf on saturday?"
lazertag
paintball
rockclimbing
hiking
pony trekking
loads of places to go, just think of something YOU wanna do, that seems fun and invite her along
 

Kbomb

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I would start talking to her first, and not ask for lunch until you figure out if you really like her. You have to see if she measures up to you. this attitude should always be in play.
 

Somedude_UK_31

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Awesome tips..I'm gonna do what GP and PF recommended.

One of you guys (GP of PF) gave me an advice in the past regarding a girl and how to put her into friends with benefits zone without commitment and it worked great, she acted exactly as you said she would (ignored me for a few days at first...etc but then came back and gave in just like you said) so I trust your wisdom.
 
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