"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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give me a good email response to try to increase IL

drift king

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this might be a lost cause but i picked up this hot rich divorced milf in a coffee shop 2 days before new years eve. she was flying to palm beach for a couple of months to escape the cold weather here (she lives here permanently but is wealthy enough from the divorce to live in palm beach (or maybe crash with friends for that time who knows))

the interaction went as follows: i asked her about her shopping bag, she went on about she gets her clothes tailored and just buys the fabric and designs it herself. she mentioned she has 2 grown up kids, she has botox and a bit of plastic surgery on the face so i'd say 45+, still got it though. when she mentioned palm beach i said was she going with her husband and she gave me a retorted response of 'no hes long gone'.. i said 'we should continue this conversation when you're back' she goes 'ok take my email' (i was gona go for the number but i was wary of the people behind us hearing everything as they were so close i got stage fright)

anyway i kissed her cheeks bye.

i emailed her happy new year couple days later, this is how the email back n forth has gone. i suspect low IL but it's possible to spark it up i think.

me: hello HB, happy new year. We met in (coffee place) on Sunday. This is my email address, it's the most important email address you'll ever save!

How is it in Florida? You should send me a photo to make me jealous"

You're a very stylish woman. Speak to you when you're back.

Drift king.

(no response, low IL)

couple week ago i realized she was due back in town in March so I tried once more.

me: hey HB, when are you due back in town?

Drift king

1 day later her: i hope all is going well for you! i hope to return sometime in April. Enjoy. HB

(not a good response really, low IL bear in mind she's much older than me at least 15 years, I'm 30)

3 days later me: Is palm springs like a retirement home kinda place haha or is there actually stuff to do there?

we should get together on your return and continue our stimulating convo.

drift king

(no response)

a week later her: Hi drift king, I hope all is well. I am in palm beach not palm springs! palm beach is in Floriday. It is very mixed age wise, young and many wealthy retired people, mostly from the US. I have lots of friends here as I lived in New York for many years. I am staying for a while, to escape the winter. Keep well, HB

see i understand there's little IL from her, but she's abroad, i'm here.. I dont know if she's in the market for a toyboy but i know on her return she'll be looking for some action. (seems a bit bitter by the divorce, i suspect she got left for a younger woman)

i know the ploy should be to be very cheeky in my response, i.e. gauge a reaction out of her of 'i cant believe he just said that!' rather than the afc type emails I've been saying so far.

Can anyone recommend to me something I should send back to try to increase the IL as we're still technically strangers with not much rapport built up?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Uncharted

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You need to get her number. Just send her an e-mail saying "Give me your cell number." If she's interested at all she will give it to you.
 

Purefilth

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Uncharted said:
You need to get her number. Just send her an e-mail saying "Give me your cell number." If she's interested at all she will give it to you.
"Give me your phone nimber, we can hook up when you get back."
 

Aristippus

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"me: hello HB, happy new year. We met in (coffee place) on Sunday. This is my email address, it's the most important email address you'll ever save!

How is it in Florida? You should send me a photo to make me jealous"

You're a very stylish woman. Speak to you when you're back."


**The first 2 underlined statements seem a bit try-hard and like you're trying to win approval. About the last one, use compliments sparingly. After 2 statements that seem try-hard, the compliment is the nail in the coffin.



"3 days later me: Is palm springs like a retirement home kinda place haha or is there actually stuff to do there?

we should get together on your return and continue our stimulating convo.
"


**Bad timing. You only suggest getting together on a high note. After you are both hitting it off. Don't take a blind swing in the air with a woman with low interest. Don't offer to get together unless you're both actually having a stimulating conversation. Right now this sounds like a one-sided romance. Be glad you dodged a bullet though. She's wealthy off of another man's money. She would probably play you in a second if given the opportunity. Only have sex with a woman like this if you've had a vasectomy and have zero chances of getting her pregnant. Otherwise, steer clear and consider this as a blessing.
 
B

BeDJ

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drift king said:
(not a good response really, low IL bear in mind she's much older than me at least 15 years, I'm 30)
You can not be serious.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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drift king

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Aristippus said:
"me: hello HB, happy new year. We met in (coffee place) on Sunday. This is my email address, it's the most important email address you'll ever save!

How is it in Florida? You should send me a photo to make me jealous"

You're a very stylish woman. Speak to you when you're back."


**The first 2 underlined statements seem a bit try-hard and like you're trying to win approval. About the last one, use compliments sparingly. After 2 statements that seem try-hard, the compliment is the nail in the coffin.



"3 days later me: Is palm springs like a retirement home kinda place haha or is there actually stuff to do there?

we should get together on your return and continue our stimulating convo.
"


**Bad timing. You only suggest getting together on a high note. After you are both hitting it off. Don't take a blind swing in the air with a woman with low interest. Don't offer to get together unless you're both actually having a stimulating conversation. Right now this sounds like a one-sided romance. Be glad you dodged a bullet though. She's wealthy off of another man's money. She would probably play you in a second if given the opportunity. Only have sex with a woman like this if you've had a vasectomy and have zero chances of getting her pregnant. Otherwise, steer clear and consider this as a blessing.
yeah i see what you mean..

i just know going down the route i am going is wrong.. afc.. too complimentary. i noticed in her last response where i negged her about retirement home it got a response cos i was being cheeky, i honestly got palm springs and palm beach mixed up when i said it.

i dont want to get involved with her.. just want to have sex.. im looking for other plates as it is but cos of the fake boobs thing she has it'll be novelty for me to bang her if i can.

going for the number now is pointless.. i know she has no IL at the moment.. i need to say things that'll DHV and also gauge a positive response from her.

for all i know she's fooling around with various guys in palm beach and thoughts towards coming home are long away away.

i agree what you said though.. compliment was nail in coffin.. too try hard.. it's only when i read back what i write do i realize these things.

im tryna start afresh and i know negging her would be the best way to up her IL if she has any but im not sure what to say.
 

drift king

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Purefilth said:
"Give me your phone nimber, we can hook up when you get back."
this wont work, she doesn't have enough IL if any for this to work.

i need to send something cheeky and neg like to get the convo rolling a bit, couple more back n forths pre her arriving back and boom should do the job.. i need it so that she has something to look forward to when she is about to come back.

i would send what you said above AFTER a couple more emails to increase her IL first. any suggestions what to say or send before sending this?
 

Aristippus

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I would suggest instead of trying to make her interested, just have fun, interesting conversations. An occasional joke is fine. Mainly use her as practice. Look at it like this. You might have to intentionally sacrifice a few women on the alter in the name of becoming better able to handle them in the future. Think of her as one of many sacrificial lambs on your quest to becoming better with women, and more importantly, a better man.
 

Naughty Ninja

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drift king said:
this wont work, she doesn't have enough IL if any for this to work.

i need to send something cheeky and neg like to get the convo rolling a bit, couple more back n forths pre her arriving back and boom should do the job.. i need it so that she has something to look forward to when she is about to come back.

i would send what you said above AFTER a couple more emails to increase her IL first. any suggestions what to say or send before sending this?
Forget all the CF routines. Simply ask her if she's ever been to Blue Martini. (It's a big bar/lounge that TONS of thirties and up hot pieces of azz go to where a lot of dudes with serious coin or posing go to pick each other up). I would almost guarantee she's been to Blue Martini if she is hot, has money, and goes to Florida a lot. I think the closest one to her is in Boca Raton. She'll most likely reply to that then ask her about good places to go in Florida and if she's a good dancer.

It may start going from dancing to her thinking of you and her dancing and further.

Or tell her to bring you back a tan from Florida. The conversation could go into tan lines, lotion, massages..etc.


You could also make a corny joke and tell her when she originally said "Palm Beach" you got completely confused and thought she was talking about a run in with a snotty psychic she'd went to in Florida.

I've been to Blue Martini several times when I go to Florida. They get TONS of hot azz in that place. Haven't been there in a few years though so it may've went downhill if a better place opened up.
 

Naughty Ninja

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Here's the link to check the Blue Martini lounge out in case you're curious. LAWD the azz that goes to that place. Even better than what's shown in the gallery pictures. I would almost guarantee O.P's chick has been there.

http://www.bluemartinilounge.com/

I'll be going down to Florida soon. Need to hit that place up again with friends who live there..
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

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