Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Girl to homecoming alone

anx1ety

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I just graduated, but my girlfriend is still in high school, and homecoming is coming up. We've been together for a little over 2 months now and she brought up how she went dress shopping with her friend today and she kinda wants to go to homecoming. So we talked about it a little bit and then it went like this....

Me: Do you plan on having a date if you go?
Her: nope nope
Me: ah okay.
Her: ha, dont gotta worry
Me: ?
Her: wouldnt you be bothered by it?
Me: what, if you had a date?
Her: ja
Me: No..I'd assume I'd be your date?
Her:ah, well. id be going soloooo. but then again, i doubt im going anyway

Should I find this disrespectful? Should I respect she wants to go alone and not be bothered by it? We've talked about the whole grinding thing so she wouldn't even be dancing if I wasn't there.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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S.Y.L

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anx1ety said:
We've talked about the whole grinding thing so she wouldn't even be dancing if I wasn't there.
hahahaha, yeah right she wouldn't
 

eaglez1177

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First off, why the fvck would you ever date a girl in HS when your outta highscool?

Sorry I just had to ask, I find that extremely foolish.

Anyways, is this girl your girlfriend or are you two just hookin up and hanging out and stuff? If its your girlfriend, then yes, I would feel very disrespected if she said she was going to homecoming "solo" (which I HIGHLY doubt she would do. If anything she would go with someone else).

If shes not your girlfriend, then who gives a sh*t. Let her do what she wants. Its good that you said that you wouldnt be bothered if she went with someone else.

Oh and regarding the grinding, if shes anything above a 6.5/10 looks wise, shes gonna be dancing all night long.
 

anx1ety

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She is actually my girlfriend. Like I said, we've been together for a little over 2 months.

She told me she wouldn't do it. I'll believe her until proven other wise. I just find it strange that she would say she's going alone since she has a boyfriend (me), and when surely her friends will have dates and she'll be alone.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Don Zorro

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With eaglez on this one mate. WHY oh why would you ever be committed to a girl in high school when you're not in high school?

My take on why she'd say she would want to go alone: If she goes alone she can still dance with anyone she wants and not feel bad about it, but if she takes a date it's breaking the relationship you guys have. But hey, I'm not you and I don't know her.
 

eaglez1177

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Don Zorro said:
With eaglez on this one mate. WHY oh why would you ever be committed to a girl in high school when you're not in high school?

My take on why she'd say she would want to go alone: If she goes alone she can still dance with anyone she wants and not feel bad about it, but if she takes a date it's breaking the relationship you guys have. But hey, I'm not you and I don't know her.
This is definitely a possibility.

I mean consider this: If all her friends are bringing dates, shes gonna feel so weird and left out if she doesnt have one. So why on earth would she tell you shes going alone? Reason: shes probably going with someone else and doesnt want you to find out.
 

anx1ety

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"Shes gonna feel so weird and left out if she doesn't have one" exactly why I'm thinking it's strange. But she's never really been big on me hanging out with her group of friends..they don't really talk to her as much when I'm there, and I guess she feels compelled to show me attention.

I honestly don't think she'd go with anyone else, cuz she knows I'd next her if she did, as well as if she danced with a guy. I don't think she's willing to take that chance.
 

Recon

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Listen bro, I've seen friends in the same position as you, and the fact is your attached. You're obviously not ready to next her, and to be honest she is probably going to be grinding all night on her classmates, and probably a random hook-up here or there. Almost all HS girls grind, and to them its commonplace, so she'll do it.

You need to move on to college girls. Start talking to other chicks so that it'll ease you from the break-up. HS/College relationships just don't work out.
 

anx1ety

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Recon said:
Listen bro, I've seen friends in the same position as you, and the fact is your attached. You're obviously not ready to next her, and to be honest she is probably going to be grinding all night on her classmates, and probably a random hook-up here or there. Almost all HS girls grind, and to them its commonplace, so she'll do it.

You need to move on to college girls. Start talking to other chicks so that it'll ease you from the break-up. HS/College relationships just don't work out.
And that's how she felt before. She went to a teen night at a club with her friend and danced, and I told her I didn't like it, and I wouldn't have it and when I explained to her why I feel that way she said she understood and when I asked her if she would do it again if she could she replied "NO NO NONONONO" or something to that effect, implying she felt bad about it. (dont tell me how she meant that nonono. trust me)

So I just don't think she'd do it..and if she did..well then I will next her. But I honestly would prefer to just be able to go with her myself.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Recon

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anx1ety said:
So I just don't think she'd do it..and if she did..well then I will next her. But I honestly would prefer to just be able to go with her myself.
Then tell her, and if she says no or brushes you off then I'm sure you can figure out what that means.
 
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