Getting Kino Started

[kel]

My main problem is getting Kino started. I'm great with my words; i kept a lengthy IM conversation sexually charged no problem last night, and in real life I'm still pretty good too.

I just cant get the Kino working. I think its got to do with fear and such. I never feel that Kino is natural. Ive been in situations where it seems Kino is expected....I know a certain girl really is into me and i should be POURING on the Kino. But it just never happens!

Anyone got any advice for this or on Kino in general? its whats really holding me back!

--Kel

 

[Mitza]

Look at her and say : "What muscle you have.Have u had a hard work last week ?!" And touch her hand pretendin you check out the muscle's.

Look at her face and say ...ooo what do u have here ? A spot ...let me clean it 4 you, and you touch she's face.

Did i help you ?!

 

[aBAzLLnA]

i kept a lengthy IM conversation sexually charged no problem last night, and in real life I'm still pretty good too.

This is what is holding you back. Kino = being playful. Just be playful.

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by kel
I never feel that Kino is natural.

Here's the problem. If you treat it like it's unnatural, when you DO attempt it, the woman will sense that vibe that you are uncomfortable touching her. It says, "I'm thinking of touching you in a way that *I* think is improper."

Now if you go up to a girl you've never met before and put your arm around her and your MOUTH says "Hello", but your body language and eyes and facial expression say, "I'm going to touch you in a way that may be improper and hope you don't object", what kind of vibe is she going to get?

Exactly...she's going to be creeped the fcuk out.

Instead, when you meet new people, MAKE it natural. Immediately shake a person's hand. If it's a girl's, hold it a little longer. When you talk to her, touch her on the upper arm. If you are going somewhere and want her to follow, put your hand on her lower back to "escort her" in a "gentlemanly" way. If you comment on her appearance or dress, touch her there to indicate what you're talking about (within reason, perv ). If you tease her, push her, pull her, tickle her, pick her up, etc. All this is innocent play...fun stuff. And it lets her know you're not afraid to be physical. When you do this, your body language portrays as you touch her, "I see nothing wrong with being touchy-feely because touch is fun and women are comfortable with me touching them. It's all innocent play."

Then it's HER mind that assigns sexual connotations to it. "Ohmigod, this totally cute guy has his arm around me, I'd think he was trying to get freaky with me, but he seems so natural doing it, almost like he didn't care. Do I think he's hitting on me because I'm thinking about him sexually? And why are my panties so wet?"

Establish up-front that you are a kinesthetic person. Not all people are COMFORTABLE with being touched right away, but just about all of them will accept you for being that way. Then, as you increase rapport you can get away with touching more and more intimately.

 

[kel]

Well the thing is, I dont have that mindset most of the time. Most girls I know, they get hugs and such.

The problem is, for example, i'm going to be chillin with a girl i know has at least SOME interest in me, watching a movie. I'm pretty sure that if I make with the kino, things will go well.

But i just dont feel right doing it. Its not like im uncomfortable touching her, i just never get the vibe like its the right thing to do yet. This is a recurring trend as well.

I dont know how to make it feel natural. Its just awkward in my head sometimes.

 

[comic_relief]

I had the same problem

I know that feeling is unnatural.

I had to change my mindset and start to just touch people in general in non-threatening ways.

If you want a boost read the bible or do a search.

 

[Heizen]

Kino is a simple thing, all it is, is showing the girl its alright to touch you. Keep it playful and you should be fine.

Examples I use:
Sometime when I see a group of people I know, I wont go up and say hello, but rather walk up, and lean on a girls sholder, like an arm rest. If you dont know them, say Hi to who you do know, and then turn to the girl and say "Oh, by the way I am XXX: *Shake with free hand*
It usually gets a laugh or to, but you need to keep a lighthearted nature, and push what feels comfortable to you in order to not only get good at kino, but to have it be a part of your personality.

 

[DJ_Dork]

use your brain to find a way to kino the girl.