"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Getting a life!

Huffman

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As I find myself spending less time in front of the computer, I've realized that I have no real passions, nothing to devote my energy to.

Hobbies:
I do have a bunch (like several sports and playing Instruments), but to me, they are more duty than passion, more habit than fun.

Goals:
I'm doing well in university, and I'm soon gonna be a well-paid software engineer (which is why I won't spend my free time on the computer), but all that came without much effort. I never had any hardships, I did what I had to. No acheivements that I truly value.

A worthy cause:
Duh. I'm at a complete loss. Create a monument of greatness? Preserve something precious? I don't know and, sadly, I don't care.

As of late, everything seems to bore me. I've lost interest in people around me, and in conversation. Needless to say, this mindset is poison for the aspiring DJ.

As I find my lack of passion slowly rotting me from the inside, I am wandering and stumbling through life, without focus, without purpose.

Have you felt similarly in the past?
How did you change it?
What did you find? What inspired you?
What did you do?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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wjh

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I've been there.

I recently quit my job, even.

You don't sound challenged. Your senses, your mind, your spirit - none of that is being stimulated with the intensity you crave.

My suggestion, and I'm no guru, would be to do some soul searching. It can be a semi-conscious thing, as I feel I'm doing, where I try very hard not to take anything for granted and enjoy what I can.

My life's been fairly difficult for the past year but I'm grateful, in a weird way, that I've had to struggle. I feel I can appreciate things I may not otherwise have appreciated.

This whole DJ thing has been more about self-reflection to me than anything else. I really feel that women, although great to have around, can only provide me with so much. They are not the answer to any of my problems, they are not what inspires me anymore, they are not the goal, they are not a requirement.

With that said however, I can apply a zero-expectations philosophy to MY game. Improve my life for the better FOR ME, because I want a great life, and the cards will fall where they may.

All that seize the day stuff is pretty cliche but for the most part is incredibly accurate.
 

Maxtro

Master Don Juan
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I'm in a similar situation.

In a few articles I've read in the DJ Bible it tells us to create our own reality (getting a life) then bring a woman into it.

And that is difficult. I have no passions and most of my time is spent in my room, on this site.

The biggest challenge that I'm facing is that it's hard to go out and do things when your alone. If I had friends to hang with I might be spending time with them.

It's good that you have real hobbies and goals. Sitting at home doing nothing is a terrible waste.
 

Huffman

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Thanks for your replies.
I have no problem going out and doing something. I've become rather disciplined as of late. It's just that I lack the drive. I don't really enjoy it.
When I do something fresh, it's pretty nice for the moment, that's about it.
About women, I don't really put the focus on them. I don't enjoy even them as much as I did anymore.

"If you could decide, what would you love to do right now?" - I got no idea.

@wjh:
Thanks for your thoughts. Take nothing for granted? Sounds good. Gotta think about that.
You are exactly right, what I need is challenge!
I'm actually thinking of going abroad for a year. Having something completely different for a start.
 

j-flex

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bump!

wow i feel exactly the same way and i dont know how to stop feeling like this.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

Faded Image

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Join the military and you'll see what life has to offer.
 

thelizardking

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It seems like you are waiting for something to happen, when it reality you have to make things happen. You have complete control over what happens or doesn't happen. If you don't like the way things are going, get out there and make it happen. A wise man once said "There are two kinds of people in this world, people who eat **** and people who run ****."
 

DonJuan11

Master Don Juan
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Faded Image said:
Join the military and you'll see what life has to offer.
Agreed.

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Let us never negotiate out of fear, but let us never fear to negotiate - John F. Kennedy.

BUT

Mama said Knock you out - LL Cool J
 
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