For inexperienced guys, should we try to close the deal quicker?

[vorbis]

Been trying to figure out my mistakes over the past few weeks. One case in particular stands out. I met this chick at a bar and got her number. As a first date we ended up back at my place watching a movie. She was displaying very high interest. We made out, heavy groping, sucking on tits etc. but she didn't want to go the whole way. She heads home after the movie, long kiss goodbye, looking good.

We made plans to hang out that Saturday if she didn't have to help out her mother. I rang her Friday and she wasn't able to make it. No sweat. I rang her again on the Sunday and left a voicemail calling her back. She didn't respond and I waited till Tuesday before calling her again (thought she'd flaked). She seemed very happy to hear from me and we scheduled a date for Thursday.

She left a voicemail on Thursday saying she was feeling unwell. I rang her back and she invited me to her friend's party that Saturday. I told her I probably wouldn't be able to make it but she said she'd ring me anyways to see and that we could always do something next week. Didn't hear from her on Saturday, rang her last Tuesday left voicemail. No reply since.

I figure for the most part I wasn't too needy about calling her. I feel I messed up in leaving so long go by without physically meeting up with her again. A friend of mine who gets a lot of ass will often get a number on Friday and try to meet her on Saturday! Another girl I know is in a year long relationship with a guy she hooked up with on a Friday. they also met up on the Saturday and Sunday! My mid game (esp phone game) is really letting me down at the moment so any advice is appreciated.

 

[Rondavu]

Women are mystical. She probably thought it was fate that you two kept on missing each other and got a bad vibe. More likely some other dude was sucking her t i t s after you did, and she already slept with him instead.

 

[vorbis]

thats kinda what I was getting at. It seems until you actually close the deal, you have no hold on her. Dragging it out (trying not to show too much interest) just seems to give more opportunities for it not to work out.

 

[mountain]

Let me comfort you by saying that you often won't have control even after bedding a girl. An idea that usually works if a woman puts up the anti-slut defense is to lay off for a while. Go sit somewhere away from her, drink or do something slightly detached from her. Don't go back to her, have her come to you.

I think you're right though, the earlier you can close the deal the better. The funny thing is that once you learn to move past the first sex barrier, other barriers take its place.