Feeling Anxious

[Loki.7]

So I'm newly single, I was in a relationship for 7 years previously.

So this is going to be the first time with someone new for a LONG time.

I've kinda thrown myself into the deep end. A women is driving 3 hours+ and paying for a hotel for a few days so we can hang out and hook up .

I've done this sort of thing in the past, so It's not a new experience.

I'm not worried about the time we will spend together but I'm nervous about the initial meet! Not even looked at another women for nearly a decade , it feels like I've got virgin guy nerves.

Not my first rodeo it's just that I've not done it in a long time. I've not put any pressure on her or myself.

Basically I've told her no pressure, it's just about getting us to know each other and it's not about sex. As in if it feels right we will just hang out, cuddle, and might not even bang, she's alright with that .

I'm 99.9 sure it's going to be a two day ****fest though (which is my favourite thing), I just don't like feeling pressured to HAVE to do this though.

Meeting her for the first time in a few hours, Kinda anxious. I think what's causing this is the fact that she's putting a fairly significant time (the long drive ) and financial investment (petrol / hotel cost/booking time off work) just to hang out and the hopes being able to have sex with me.

Just needed to vent / write what I'm feeling on paper. First world problems.

 

[2Rocky]

You need to set her expectations that it is going to be about sex.....set the tone from the get go by being physically affectionate. I was in your shoes 5 years ago. I decided I was going to kiss her upon arrival. I saw her for the first time in person, said "Hello I'm Rocky " Kissed her passionately then took her hand and lead her to the car. We went straight to the room, into bed and didn't come out until dinner. Three nights of passion and then I took her to the airport.

If you built up the Sexual Tension enough in your communication, you can use that nervousness and anticipation to your advantage. Remember YOU LEAD. Don't be a BOSS, but lead with action.

I met a woman in a bar that was obviously into me. Kissed her in the Elevator up to my room in the hotel . She gave me her card. Texted her and her response was " I don't want you to think I'm THAT kind of girl"

My response "Well, I'm THAT kind of guy"

She texts back "Room XXX"

I never spent the night in my own room the next 2 nights.....Own it...

 

[TheNewStyle123]

You need to set her expectations that it is going to be about sex.....set the tone from the get go by being physically affectionate. I was in your shoes 5 years ago. I decided I was going to kiss her upon arrival. I saw her for the first time in person, said "Hello I'm Rocky " Kissed her passionately then took her hand and lead her to the car. We went straight to the room, into bed and didn't come out until dinner. Three nights of passion and then I took her to the airport.

If you built up the Sexual Tension enough in your communication, you can use that nervousness and anticipation to your advantage. Remember YOU LEAD. Don't be a BOSS, but lead with action.

I met a woman in a bar that was obviously into me. Kissed her in the Elevator up to my room in the hotel . She gave me her card. Texted her and her response was " I don't want you to think I'm THAT kind of girl"

My response "Well, I'm THAT kind of guy"

She texts back "Room XXX"

I never spent the night in my own room the next 2 nights.....Own it...

Love that.

 

[daproest1]

You need to set her expectations that it is going to be about sex.....set the tone from the get go by being physically affectionate. I was in your shoes 5 years ago. I decided I was going to kiss her upon arrival. I saw her for the first time in person, said "Hello I'm Rocky " Kissed her passionately then took her hand and lead her to the car. We went straight to the room, into bed and didn't come out until dinner. Three nights of passion and then I took her to the airport.

If you built up the Sexual Tension enough in your communication, you can use that nervousness and anticipation to your advantage. Remember YOU LEAD. Don't be a BOSS, but lead with action.

I met a woman in a bar that was obviously into me. Kissed her in the Elevator up to my room in the hotel . She gave me her card. Texted her and her response was " I don't want you to think I'm THAT kind of girl"

My response "Well, I'm THAT kind of guy"

She texts back "Room XXX"

I never spent the night in my own room the next 2 nights.....Own it...

Yup. Spot on. This was great.

 

[Loki.7]

You need to set her expectations that it is going to be about sex.....set the tone from the get go by being physically affectionate. I was in your shoes 5 years ago. I decided I was going to kiss her upon arrival. I saw her for the first time in person, said "Hello I'm Rocky " Kissed her passionately then took her hand and lead her to the car. We went straight to the room, into bed and didn't come out until dinner. Three nights of passion and then I took her to the airport.

If you built up the Sexual Tension enough in your communication, you can use that nervousness and anticipation to your advantage. Remember YOU LEAD. Don't be a BOSS, but lead with action.

I met a woman in a bar that was obviously into me. Kissed her in the Elevator up to my room in the hotel . She gave me her card. Texted her and her response was " I don't want you to think I'm THAT kind of girl"

My response "Well, I'm THAT kind of guy"

She texts back "Room XXX"

I never spent the night in my own room the next 2 nights.....Own it...

I've got a very different style to you. I suppose I naturally build up the sexual tension through my actions, but verbally I'm quite coy about it.

I suppose I confuse women. Escalating and de escalating at the same time. I'm not even trying to do this, It's just my personality / who I am. I build up, back off, build again , e.t.c. it's as if I'm trying to stop myself having my way with them and women seem to love it.

Previously before my relationship my first dates always went on for days and were filled with sex. I don't know why but women tend to open up to me and give themselves completely, it's very natural.

Anyways the date went well. We had sex for three days and pretty much didn't leave the room.

I was anxious about meeting, hence this thread, nervous when first seeing her and but quickly felt at ease.

What works for me is I'm so naturally calm and chilled, it's sort of infectious, it's hard to explain its as if I hypnotize people and they naturally get dragged under into my world . On the inside I'm very dominant and sure of myself , as in I know what I want and know that I will get it.

That doesn't meant I don't get anxious to nervous. I must definitely do!

So I suppose the initial anxiety and overcoming is why I made this thread. I don't need to change what I do with women because it works. I just need tips to get rid of the initial anxiety for my benefit and not anyone else's.

I guess I'm trying to help understand myself.