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fearing one-itis

Blaaaaat

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I've been dating this girl for almost a month. IL is pretty high, sex is good, and I really enjoy her company. Problem is, I'm starting to get infatuated with this girl.

It seems she's really into me, but there is one thing she said
which bother me. 3 weeks ago she said that she really likes being with me, but she doesn't wants to be committed because all of the problems with her ex. We started out together like a month after she broke up with her ex, but the ex kept stalking her, pulled of every AFC-move that exists.... This guy is no longer bothering her, he stopped like 3 weeks ago.

We've discussed the "No committing" thingie, I said it was fine with me because it was to soon to decide. So we decided to just keep on going and see what would happen. Before you ppl start, I'm 100% sure she's not screwing other dudes.

But at this point I'm scared I'm developing a case of one-itis.
I don't want to lose control over my emotions again and I'm even thinking of stopping this "relationship" before it's to late to step out. But then again, Nothing is guaranteed in live and to achieve something one should take risks.

I'm not sure what to do anymore...

Well, sorry for my rant, just needed to blow off some steam.
 

drZaius09

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Originally posted by Blaaaaat
Before you ppl start, I'm 100% sure she's not screwing other dudes.
Don't say that. Although it shouldn't be a concern for you anyway, and if it is, then you surely DO have a full-blown case on one-itis.

I'm not going to regurgitate DJ Bible lore because you should already know what you have to do to keep her. You are in a good spot; if her last boyfriend ran the AFC marathon, when you play the right game it will be a refreshing change for her.
 

Blaaaaat

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Re: Re: fearing one-itis

Originally posted by drZaius09
Don't say that. Although it shouldn't be a concern for you anyway, and if it is, then you surely DO have a full-blown case on one-itis.
Okay, 99% sure. This girl is the sister of one of my best friends, and I've known her for a couple of years now. She's a good girl and she has integrity. If she would bang some other guy, I would drop her in a second and she knows i will, so Im not in the infatuation zone yet. But it's starting to come.

I'm not going to regurgitate DJ Bible lore because you should already know what you have to do to keep her. You are in a good spot; if her last boyfriend ran the AFC marathon, when you play the right game it will be a refreshing change for her.
Hmm just keep on going with the DJ-ism, maybe Ishould start creating new oportunities with some other girls... just in case.
 

drZaius09

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Re: Re: Re: fearing one-itis

Originally posted by Blaaaaat
If she would bang some other guy, I would drop her in a second and she knows i will, so Im not in the infatuation zone yet.
I've got to say that this sentence makes absolutely NO sense whatsoever. If this is really your attitude, then the exact opposite would be true.
 

Matt ala Casanova

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You need to get over your insecurities!

M.A.C.
 

Blaaaaat

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Originally posted by drZaius09
I've got to say that this sentence makes absolutely NO sense whatsoever. If this is really your attitude, then the exact opposite would be true.
Uhm... I would feel bad ofcourse. But at this state my rational thinking is stronger than my emotional thinking. But i can feel it slip away, hope it makes sense.
 

OleRyder

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Re: Re: Re: Re: fearing one-itis

Originally posted by drZaius09
I've got to say that this sentence makes absolutely NO sense whatsoever. If this is really your attitude, then the exact opposite would be true.
Hm, I think Blaaaaat is doing the right thing here. He set the terms of a relationship ("relationship" defined loosely here), she knows what those terms are and she is free to take them or leave it. Where's infatuation?
 

DankNuggs

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Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: fearing one-itis

Originally posted by OleRyder
Hm, I think Blaaaaat is doing the right thing here. He set the terms of a relationship ("relationship" defined loosely here), she knows what those terms are and she is free to take them or leave it. Where's infatuation?
He is already enfatuated, its another one of these overly defined existances, defining roles like a lawyer would...You've agreed to NOT be committed. That means your NOT exclusive. That means she can see or bang anyone she pleases....as can you. You're already aware that you consider the relationship committed because you've threatened to drop her if she exercises her freedom. Date her casually, date other people, you allow your one-itis by acting above and beyond what reality is telling you.

You obviously can understand the connections between words and actions. You agreed to be 'not committed' yet are acting 'committed.' She has gone out of her way to define the relationship as 'not committed' she may change her mind, but in no way is it your decision...She has taken that power for herself...Allow her to lie in the bed she made...Don't be committed...its the most simple way to cure one-itis...if she changes her mind, so be it...
 
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