fear of cold approach gona in 1 day goal!

[david90]

I've been on here for a while now. About 8 months to be exact. I've read the bible and learned tricks like cf, neg hit, conversation, # closing, how to act, be a man etc but the thing that bothers me is that I couldn't apply the tricks because I chicken out on approaches. In the past 8 months, I did only about 5 approaches and failed to # close on all of them. I've been single and afraid of cold approaches for too long and it needs to stop. I rather push everything into a day rather than stretching for god knows how many months or years.

Therefore, I have set myself a goal for this coming Friday.

My goal for this friday is to approach and # close +20 girls. It is a bold move so i'm gonna try everything to meet my goal. Do you think +20 cold ones in one day will rid my fear?

How bout some of u guys take on my challenge as well? It would motivate me greatly.

 

[Anaxibios]

Sounds like a great idea to get rid of the fear... don't expect too many positives, though...

I've been trying some cold approaches, and the first ones were terrible, i was very nervous... it'll take more than 20 over a while to be confident enough for a high success rate.

Congrats on changing your life!

Even teh small successes do so much for your self esteem!

 

[david90]

#'s would just be a plus. My goal is just to approach then work on my game later.

 

[Walden]

Okay , I'm in. I'm training to be a PUA , so I do about a dozen a normal training day, but I'll crank it up to 20 if it'll help to get this thread going. Who's next?

 

[david90]

if you could do 10 then I don't see why 20 is a problem for u.

Expect a report from me on Saturday.

 

[david90]

I went to Borders today and approached an HB 7 at the mag stand. IMO, she could easily jump up to a 9 if she wears make up. I opened by showing her a pic of britney spears grabbing her fiance crotch and she laughed. I was a total AFC cuz the convo kinda goes on and off for like 45min. Finally she was about to leave and I said i'm gonna leave too (AFC move) and successfully # closed her in the parking lot. Because of the way I acted, I thought that she's going to flake if I call but after she told me her #, she said "I'll be expecting a call from you."

U guys think she's gonna flake even though she said that?

God damn, I went out for 4 hours and managed 1 approach. I better step it up
.

 

[Walden]

Huh I thought the goal was to open 20 girls on friday.

 

[david90]

I have to wait until my finals are over.

 

[Ever onward]

***PLEASE NOTE WALDEN IS THE ONLY EXCEPTION TO WHAT I'M ABOUT TO SAY THE MAN IS UNGODLY***

David,

20 approaches in one day? Come on man you've done the Bootcamp, you know that it's difficult to get in 20 hellos in one day let alone have 20 conversations, let alone risk flat out rejection 20 times.

Your aiming too high and your setting yourself up for disapointment.

What will happen is you'll realize there is no way you can reach your goal in one day and you'll give up. Man try to go for 5 approach/rejections on Friday. If you would do that I might join in myself.

Start with something reasonable then build on your success, don't set an unreachable goal for yourself.

 

[david90]

yeah 20 is a lot. I would have to approach everything that is in a skirt in order to get 20. I'm gonna go crazy that day and try it anyway.

For now, I just got another cold approach and another successful # close . I was in the library looking for a target and there she was using the computer. I sat next to her and prentented to have computer problem (does this sound lame? It is to me). I asked her and we went on from there. Near the end, this was how I # closed her.

We were walking.
her: so whats your name?
me: david, u?
her: sujen
Me: nice to meet u (with a long hand shake)
Me: I think your pretty
her: nah i'm ok.

.
.
.
Me: are you single?
her: technically i'm not (huh?)
Me: huh? Well if you are, then let me give you a call sometime.
her: alright.

so far two approaches and two numbers. Not to brag or anything but I wanted a rejection cuz I want to desensitize it.

 

[christz]

i would get on board with this, BUT i know i would probably pus*y out =/

 

[david90]

well I didn't make it to 20 today. I made only 2 cold ones . My plan was to go to the mall and do most of my approaches but the mall is so hard to sarge. People are on the move and clerks are busy due to holiday season.

I managed two cold ones at B&N and at walgreen though. I didn't do multiple cold approach at the same store cuz I think it makes me look desperate.

B&N

While buying coffee, I saw this HB7 eyeing me. I bought my coffee, went up to her table and said, hey how's it going? Convo was kinda dull and went on for about 10 min before I # close. She rejected me by saying that she's never home so her # won't do me any good. Oh well.

Walgreen

Saw this chick and init convo but she wasn't responding well so I just left while her back was turned .

i'm glad I got two rejections today because it disensitize to rejection and that is a mile stone for me.

 

[Rob]

"Convo was kinda dull and went on for about 10 min before I # close"

why are you # closing if the convo sucks ? you get her number if she's cool man. bottom line. Good connection=close. otherwise she gets an it was nice meeting you.

 

[david90]

I kinda have a fear of # closing so i did it just to get over the fear.

 

[Ever onward]

well I didn't make it to 20 today. I made only 2 cold ones . My plan was to go to the mall and do most of my approaches but the mall is so hard to sarge. People are on the move and clerks are busy due to holiday season.

I hate to say I told you so and I won't. It is good to set goals, but don't set them so high they are unreachable. Go after your goals in "bite size chunks" See if you had tried going for 5 approaches like I said, you might have reached that goal. Afterall, you had 2 already, so why not do 3 more? Just take it one step at a time but make sure your always making progress.

Walgreen

Saw this chick and init convo but she wasn't responding well so I just left while her back was turned .

i'm glad I got two rejections today because it disensitize to rejection and that is a mile stone for me.

Hey man that isn't even a rejection. What did she reject? Nothing! Because you didn't give her anything to reject. Do like Gunwitch says, hang in there until the girl actually says No. "Make the ho say no".

Have you been reading Pugs' 100 approach journal? His goal is similar to yours about beating the fear of rejection. So if you get in a conversation that isn't going well then use the "are u single" method and at least try for the number.

I mean come on, you want to beat your fear of rejection but you were too afraid to ask for the girls number because the conversation wasn't going great. Remember this is just a learning experience for you. It doesn't matter if you screw up, get a number, don't get a number, or have sex with her 10 minutes after meeting her. This is all for practice so don't be afraid to go for it. Ask for the number, "make the ho say no"

 

[david90]

I gave one of the # I got a call today and I left a message telling her that I wanted to take her out to eat. She called me back and said that today isn't a good day and that sometime on the weekends is better. After she told me that, I said I do u want me to call u or ur going to call me and she said either. Was saying that a mistake? It sounded kinda desperate.

As for approaches I don't have any today. There are about 3 bookstore around my area and i've been to all 3 within the last 7 days. I feel cheesy coming back cuz somebody might recognize me and see me trying to pickup. Should I be afraid of that?

I tried the mall but it was so hard. Girls were on the move and clerks were busy. I don't know how to deal with it.

What is more scary to u, rejected by your target or knowing that people around u know u got rejected?

 

[christz]

you thinking that other people are watching you is your self esteem

there's actually a staistic of how much other people notice certian things.. and it pretty much says nobody notices anything.

in the short nobody probably notices you gettin shut down even if you were getting shut down right next to them.

and the same goes for apperance, say you got a zit or your hair just wasen't right, you see yourself every single day and night in the mirror and you've seen yourself your whole life. Chances are your gonna see every little imperfection and others will not in fact its proven others don't.

 

[david90]

true, I did saw experiments done on tv showing that people don't really pay attention when in public.