Family Issues

[tristan22]

Several years ago, i graduated from college and had high hopes for myself. Fast forward a couple years; i'm still broke, i have a $hit job, and i can't afford to move out. SO much for the go to college and get a great job cliche!

My dilemma:

My mom takes it upon her self to tell the whole world my life story (relatives, her co-workers, etc.) and they in return provide me with negative commentary and ill will. I can't understand why these people (my relatives especially) find happiness and satisfaction in my shortcomings and lack of success? It's bad enough that my professional life sucks, but the constant "failure" reminder is really starting to get to me.

I have read all of the "success" books, however there is one element i am missing from equation; a break. Each and every successful person has had some sort of epiphany or break in their journey towards greatness.

A lot of posters have some insightful information and i'm hoping someone will help me out in regards to this matter. This may seem petty and whiney, but this matter really is a great hindrance to my life.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

 

[Jariel]

I know the feeling and I'm looking for a way out too. I gave up my job to return to studying in the hope of bettering myself, but I've only ended up in debt and back living with my parents with no privacy. Needless to say, this is a real downer when it comes to women too.

 

[diplomatic_lie]

Originally posted by tristan22
I have read all of the "success" books, however there is one element i am missing from equation; a break. Each and every successful person has had some sort of epiphany or break in their journey towards greatness.

What do you mean by this?

 

[DJDamage]

Hey Tristan I know how you feel. I am almost the same situation as you.

Hopefully soon I will purchase a car which will allow me less dependence on family and also will be looking to go back to school like Jarial did to get into some sort of specialised trade. Also when it gets tense in the house it gives you a chance to get away. My lack of motivation due to constant faliure in landing that ilusive great job has hindered my progress (After you graduate from college it is imperative that one tries it damn hardest to move out because the longer you stay the harder it is to stay motivated to move out)

Situation in the house is always tense and I am planning to get out as soon as possible. I recently started some sh1t fulltime job which I think I will quit/get fired very soon. If that happens I will get the same onslaught of negative reinforcement from my mother about being a loser that can't find a job. If this continue's I rather live in my car with a suitcase then in this house!

You need to get yourself some goals: I have my own which are similer.

1) Sign up for some college for specialized trade (post graduate programs are faster then your normal 4 years programs)

2) Get 2 part time jobs/flexiable hours to pay for school/car/life ie bartending/waiter

3) Ask around your friends if they are willing or know someone who would make a good roomate and move into some above average hole in the wall until you graduate and start making a decent living (its better to live in hole in the wall tiny a$$ apartment and making your own rules and live by them, then live in a decent house with great living conditions but under the thumb and influence of someone else)

4) Read more books on financing so you will know more how to keep from going into debt and making more money ( Rich Dad, Poor Dad is an excellent start)

Just try to keep your head above water until you can swim on your own.

 

[sfalexi]

We've all got problems.

Just yesterday my dad told me I have 3 weeks to continue using my car, after which he told me that he's going to take it back and sell it and keep the money. So I have 3 weeks to find and buy/register/insure a car with whatever money I can scrape up from my tax refund and saving.

He also told me that he's going to treat me as a stranger (pretty much disowned me)

What pisses me off the most about it is that when he gave me the keys to it, he told me to my face that it was the last big thing he'll ever do for me. And now he has the gall to take it back.

Life blows. My advice to you is just to ignore it. And don't look for a "break" or "epiphany". Do what you can do survive. As someone said above, get another job. It may suck working so much, or doing whatever job it is, but keep in mind that it's temporary as you continue to search for a job in whatever field you got a degree in.

And if all else fails, there's always the option to serve Uncle Sam (an option which looks more and more attractive to me with each passing week)

Alexi