Experienced guys..... Come on in...

[In2theGame]

So cutting to the chase,.... My side business is doing well however i did not want to touch my capital and let my wealth grow so for now i decided to get a Job working a big project for a top company. Anyway,.. I started about a year ago and I've been promoted twice already so I'm doing pretty solid in my role. So a few months ago this new Woman began working with our team and when she first started, we never spoke and did not speak to one another until about 2 months after she started.

For the past few months, It has been nothing but a huge flirting party between her and I. I have caught her staring at me from across the room and I would stare right back at her. She would flash a grin and so would I. You guys know what im talking about... That "I'd love to lick you up and down" look lol. So things started getting heavier as i would walk past her, staring at me and making smart azz remarks to each other, Sort of like a playful tease, bumping into me or my chair, She's always coming to sit next to me or Where ever im sitting, she would plug and charge her phone right where I am. Co workers have caught on and im constantly getting questions if im going to take her out. She's always teasing me about my body because quite frankly, im in very good shape. Low BF with solid mass and it shows. Last week i was supposed to be at an executive meeting with a client but it got cancelled out, I showed up to the office mid day and when i walked in, The smile on this chicks face was from ear to ear. I didnt acknowledge her when i walked in because i had to jump on a conference call and later in the day she gave me Sh*t because she felt like i was ignoring her. I teased her about it and all was good.

End of this week that passed, I said "fvck it, im going after it" and since I'm now one of the bosses, i can manipulate my schedule a bit where i see fit. So, here goes.... She comes sits next to me and we're talking/sarcastic flirting and whatnot,... I said "Listen, are you allowed to give your number out?" She smiles a bit and asks "Why", I responded with "Exactly what i said, Are you allowed to give your number out?" I used this as a test to see which number she gives me... We all have Phones specifically for work purposes and of course our own personal phones. She says "Yes, you can have my number" She gives me her personal number. Im thinking, Nice! Now i dont need to talk to her in front of all these people and can keep convo's under wraps through text when shes across the room. About an hour later i sent her a text "I'm not sure if its appropriate or not but are you free next weekend for a drink?", I looked over and see her smiling and responding immediately ..."I may have to work OT but.. Im seeing someone so i cant". I'm sitting there with a smile on my face like.... hmm wtf. lol

For the next hour and a half, we kind of didnt look at each other and when i would have to walk by her, she would look away, in a embarrassed kind of way. I thought , Eh fvck it. Oh well. and kept on with my day. Then after a while I had to walk by her again and she muttered "Do some work" As if she was tryng to get my attention. I told her to "shut her mouth and get to work". After a while i caught her looking at me and then looking away. Towards the end of the day she gets close to me and i said "You like being a pain in my azz dont you" and she smiled saying "Yes" and i responded, "seems like you like busting my balls" she laughed and said "Yes i do" And i said "I know you do, i like that, that's why i asked you out" She looked down and smiled. I packed up my sh*t and got ready to head out after a long day.

She was in the office talking to a coworker and I was heading out, I wanted to tell her something but i said fvck it ill send it by text, I said something like "If you ever change your mind, Id love to take you out for a drink. I think your very sexy. keep in mind. Have a good wknd" She never responded. She had sent me a friend request on FB but i never accepted it. I did take a look at her page quickly though and she has a very young son and I saw the guy she's seeing and the dude looks like the typical "nice guy". I think she met him online or something as I heard her talkin to a coworker and she was asked if thats how she met him. She said yes but her response to it was awkward saying something like "Yea, he's a nice guy". Last i saw she took the Friend request back.

Anyway, enough story.... Im thinking maybe my text made her pissed? Or that she didnt like what I said? I need some of you guys who have good input on this. Im going to see her on Monday and Im wondering how to play this. Ive been with tons of Women however i still dont know everything and would appreciate Guys in similar situations and experience comment on this.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

Two things

1. She has a boyfriend. Don't try to still come on her and make things awkward.

2. Don't get fired trying to mess with her. She could easily go to HR and she does have proof because of your text.

There's plenty of chicks out there man. Only deal with the ones that give you 100% cooperation.

 

[Tictac]

You are obsessed by a woman you've done some light flirting with at the office.

Why?

She's involved with someone else (no biggie) and she works where you do (never sh*t where you eat).

Most of what you typed was about what you thought was going on. And it sounds like nearly all of it was in your head. The first time you did anything about this chick (that you were convinced was so into you) she blew you off. So you misread the situation. She never gave a crap other than for some office banter.

 

[amoka]

Never sh!t where you eat.

 

[Desdinova]

First of all, I'll have to agree with the others with not sticking your d1nk in the company ink.

Second, some comments on your game...

I said "Listen, are you allowed to give your number out?" She smiles a bit and asks "Why", I responded with "Exactly what i said, Are you allowed to give your number out?" I used this as a test to see which number she gives me...

I NEVER ask for the number. I tell her to give it to me. Example: "Give me your number so we can do xxxx." It's an assertive and confident way to do it, even if you appear a bit nervous.

About an hour later i sent her a text "I'm not sure if its appropriate or not but are you free next weekend for a drink?"

You're asking again. This ties into the way I initially ask for the number. I usually combine the number close and the activity into once statement. I don't give her a choice. If she isn't available or is taken, she'll let me know.

I looked over and see her smiling and responding immediately ..."I may have to work OT but.. Im seeing someone so i cant"

There is a couple of things going on here. A woman will accept your offer if she sees you as higher value than the guy she's dating. What you've done here is comprimised your confidence in the name of uncertainty. This is something that nice guys always do. So now, you're likely sitting at equal value with her bf. Now she "doesn't know what she wants" where as before, she was likely considering dumping her bf for you.

You ALWAYS need to appear as higher value than any man your target may have in her life.

I said something like "If you ever change your mind, Id love to take you out for a drink. I think your very sexy. keep in mind. Have a good wknd" She never responded.

And appropriately so. You've stooped to the level of all the other guys who would like to date her by throwing a compliment at her. Compliments belong to women you're fvcking, and even then should be sporatic.

 

[WanderingMan]

First of all, I'll have to agree with the others with not sticking your d1nk in the company ink.

Second, some comments on your game...



I NEVER ask for the number. I tell her to give it to me. Example: "Give me your number so we can do xxxx." It's an assertive and confident way to do it, even if you appear a bit nervous.



You're asking again. This ties into the way I initially ask for the number. I usually combine the number close and the activity into once statement. I don't give her a choice. If she isn't available or is taken, she'll let me know.



There is a couple of things going on here. A woman will accept your offer if she sees you as higher value than the guy she's dating. What you've done here is comprimised your confidence in the name of uncertainty. This is something that nice guys always do. So now, you're likely sitting at equal value with her bf. Now she "doesn't know what she wants" where as before, she was likely considering dumping her bf for you.

You ALWAYS need to appear as higher value than any man your target may have in her life.



And appropriately so. You've stooped to the level of all the other guys who would like to date her by throwing a compliment at her. Compliments belong to women you're fvcking, and even then should be sporatic.

^^^^^THIS^^^^^

Your game was tight. And your patience was remarkable. But, to add on to what Desdinova said, you should have asked this chick out in person, IMO. Something simple and easy with no pressure: "you free after work?" "want to get a drink?" "on you of course" (last part to keep up the playful teasing). No pressure here, and it can be seen as just work friends going out for a drink. Sometimes if you are too direct with your intentions, even if she wants to go out with you, she will turn you down just for the sake of turning you down. Women don't want to come across as too eager or too easy, and especially considering you work together and everyone knows you too have something going on, she needs to keep up appearances. So it's sometimes best to keep it light and playful. Also, with this one, you have-had time, so you could have waited for an opening, which she would have created if her interest was high:

Her: I'm trying to figure out something to do tonight.
You: What are you thinking?
Her: I don't know, I'm just not in the mood to go home.
You: I'm going go get a drink down at *insert bar/restaraunt*. You should come along, it will be fun.

She won't know what your intentions are, and that's a good thing. There's no expectations here^, so no pressure. If something happens, then it happens. If nothing happens, that's fine too - you guys will just go back to work the next day, and, in this scenario, nothing will have changed.