Expand my circle of closer FRIENDS

[intrextrovert]

Hey, new here. I live in a small town with little to do within walking/short driving distance, and I am 15. I am short, almost 5'5, but lift weights and wrestle during the winter. Probably going to take up cross country or something in the fall and spring this year, and join the band (guitar).

I'm the guy who everyone knows and is friends with them (IE can talk to anyone) but is only closer friends (IE hangs out outside of school with) a few people. Decently "popular". Esp. with girls, there is one hot girl that I can call up and chill with, and a few decent ones I could. I feel more comfortable calling girls I don't know too well rather than guys if there's nothing going on as I can flirt to fill the time.

This has been bugging me because if I don't get outgoing a bunch I may just sit around all day for days in a row during this summer (I was also away for a lot so I've been out of touch with friends). I would prefer to get this handled than get a good girlfriend right now, so I'm not too worried about being friend zoned or anything.

My GOALS:
Expand my circle of closer friends
Hang out outside of school with more people
Befriend the hot/popular girls (guys too but that is a lot less of a problem)
--------Specific: at least three hot girls that I am friends with enough to hang out whenever
Have more people call/invite ME to do things
Make sure I get invited to the few parties that go on around here

Questions:
How should I go about getting to know people better and making them closer friends? The problem here is a lot of times there isn't anything to do! I feel fine if we're gonna go do something, but I do not feel comfortable being the host and just chilling with people I'm not closer friends with.

How should I go about befriending the hotter, more popular girls?

How do I generally increase my popularity and value in high school, get into the top circles?

 

[suaveplayer]

hey i have the same problem, so ill be reading the responses closely too. i live in exactly the same kinda town. small, with not much to do

 

[SinJester]

A lot of guys have the same problem, I did too. I wish I had a concrete answer to give you guys. I live in a small town too. You have to realize that everything can be fun if you make it fun, even just chilling down the street. Every time anyone asks you to do something rather than sitting at home, take the offer.

To make friends into close friends, all you have to do is spend more time with them. At school, after school, on weekends... whatever. Some people may disagree with this but at times where you can't go out and there is nothing to do try talking to people on msn. Get to know them but don't try too hard with asking craploads of questions.

About befriending hotter and more popular girls, well that's easy. Just go and talk to them and be friends and don't treat them much different from your guy buddies. It isn't hard to be friends with someone. If they pick up you don't want anything from them, and you don't fall in love with every hot girl you see, it is very easy. Being just friends with hot girls is awesome for your game. So don't go about making friends with girls too much different than with guys.

To truly become charismatic and popular, you must first let go of your need for people to think of you as popular. You need to stop caring what people think of you, and you can't do that by thinking "What do they think of me? Do they think I'm cool?". It is a cruel irony but it is definately true.

The best thing I did for my popularity was hit the party scene. Even if you aren't invited rock up with some girls or a few cool friends and give it a try. Talk to everyone there, get to know everyone you don't know. Be fun.

 

[suaveplayer]

good answer sinJester. very helpful!

 

[suaveplayer]

nothing else?

 

[intrextrovert]

Thanks for the advice sinjester. I'm generally going to try to be a lot more social, expand my comfort zone.