"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Lordeterra

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 22, 2020
Messages
331
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258
Age
30
Anyone good in game want to talk about the current girls we are banging and discuss? Moved to a new town and usually aftrer i **** a new girl i go to my friends to discuss the awesomeness but dont have anyone i know here lol
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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EyeOnThePrize

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 9, 2019
Messages
1,163
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1,914
Age
36
Discussing the awesomeness or identifying with it works against you. You want to normalize getting laid, thus it should be no big deal and nothing to glorify.

Don't revolve around pus$y, it's worthless.
 

Black Widow Void

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 24, 2010
Messages
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If someone here is a virgin and gets their first piece, I'm all for giving them a virtual hi-5. The same goes for the guy that's widowed or fresh out of a divorce. Otherwise, it (at least to me) comes across as meaningless to discuss our conquests.

I'm sure that there's some other members that would be happy to discuss their conquests though and interesting enough... they usually have high message numbers; which makes you kind of wonder when they had time away from the forum to actually get laid.
 
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