"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Ex Won't leave me alone

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tolstoydj

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Haven't talked in a year. Called me last week and left a long bs message about how happy she is and has heard I'm doing well (I am). Of course I did not respond. Texted me tonight asking to support her artistic expression of choice. Of course I am not going to respond.

Is ignoring going to work in this case, or do I have to be mean?

She broke up with me, and at this point I have zero interest in talking to her.

Is silence still my best option for making her go away.

I do not want to be spoon-fed information about her life that I don't care about.

Thanks for all the advice

Pax
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Vidrio

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Try to get her number blocked. Besides that stay NC. Giving her any sort of response will just convince her to continue contacting you.
 
C

Cremasta

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I think it depends on the circumstances that you broke up in.

If there was a big blowup, then I'd lean towards not responding. The other option here is to actually pick up the phone and tell her 'Look, last time we spoke, you made it clear that you didn't want me around anymore, so excuse me, but I'm just not interested in what you're doing.'

If it was fairly amicable, then I would respond, but just keep those responses to 'yes', 'no' and 'ok'. At some point (hopefully soon) she might try to escalate and want to catch up, that's when you say 'No, I don't think so.'
If you don't want to stay in contact with her, you need to make sure she clearly gets that message.
 
Peaks&Valleys

Peaks&Valleys

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Do you really want her to leave you alone? Really? If that's the case then I have a simple solution:

Don't shower or put on deorderant for three days. Then call her up and tell her you want to meet for coffee so you can talk about "girl stuff". Then show up with a 3 day old beard and a blonde wig and tell her you're thinking about crossing over and you want her to be your friend.
 
E

Exoduso

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LOL @ the last guy...
Anyways, fvck her. Keep ignoring her, you've got no reason to contact her now just like you had no reason to contact her when she broke up with you last year.
The past is in the past, don't regress and keep moving forward.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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V

vatoloco

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tolstoydj said:
She broke up with me, and at this point I have zero interest in talking to her.
Click to expand...
Yet you do not delete/block her number and/or immediately delete without listening/reading voicemails and texts... ;)


I do not want to be spoon-fed information about her life that I don't care about.
Click to expand...
Then don't.

Do as I said above.
 
SgtSplacker

SgtSplacker

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Yeah dude, i'd just hit it and never return her calls unless you are horny...
 
T

twentee

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sounds to me like you still want the option of doing her.
 
Y

yougottaknow90

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tolstoydj said:
Haven't talked in a year. Called me last week and left a long bs message about how happy she is and has heard I'm doing well (I am). Of course I did not respond. Texted me tonight asking to support her artistic expression of choice. Of course I am not going to respond.

Is ignoring going to work in this case, or do I have to be mean?

She broke up with me, and at this point I have zero interest in talking to her.

Is silence still my best option for making her go away.

I do not want to be spoon-fed information about her life that I don't care about.

Thanks for all the advice

Pax
Click to expand...
here's what may have happened:

she got tired of your relationship with her, broke up with you, went on to pursue other things she thought would help her grow/develop as a person and make her happier, fvcked up, became unhappier than before, realized she needs some sort of stability in life, wants you back, and decided the best way to do this was to call you, leave a message going over how happy she was, and hope that you'd take the steering wheel from there and try to get her back.

dont do it daw. NC that hoe. the fact that she sent a follow up text is testimony.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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VladPatton

VladPatton

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Don't get re-sucked into her vortex of shıt! NC is the way to go, hands down, no doubt.
 
V

Valentino14

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How hard is it to block her number? If you ignore her she should get the hint. She is just looking for attention because she just probably got dumped.
 
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tolstoydj

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you guys are the sh!t. thanks very much. I realize it is just for an ego stroke that she is pursuing me, yet its still frustrating that she hears stuff about me through the grapevine, or so she said. I wish she knew nothing at all about my life, and I could block her, but I guess deep down I'd definitely hit that at the right point in time. P*ssy was amazing, relationship was just crazy. not only because of her, I'm a bit off my rocker too. Still ignoring, and didn't hear anything today. Thank God
 
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