I was going to let that post be that, and hope that it got though to you, but your situtation is too similar to what I went though a couple of years back (ironically at 19) and JUST NOW getting ahold of the situtation, mainly because the entire time even though I knew better, I tried to get her back, or better yet.. get her, and even when I wasn't trying to get her, my entire self worth was in her fate.
I cannot stress how much you don't want to be in that position.. and that's real.
And I'm pretty good looking. I never had a problem dating women, I wanted HER,
the only way you can totally control the situtation right now is to control yourself.
The only way you can control yourself is to get ahold of the situtation.
Let me share something with you that I haven't shared with too many people, none here as a matter of fact.
Most people here know I started and earlier this year, sold my own company. I don't want for money... As a matter of fact I'm pretty set to be quite honest with you. I have a nice house.. mainly because real estate down here is mexican dirt cheap, but that's beside the point.. I have a nice car. I'm considered good looking...
In other words, I'm a catch in my own right.
However, although all this is true, this one, although georgous, but nevertheless one girl, this one girl not calling me, or not wanting to date me always kept me with a low self esteem.
I ACTUALLY HAD TO GO SEE A FREAKIN SHRINK!!!! It took 2 months of me seeing a shrink for her to get it though my head that hey...you control if you are happy or not, not her.
That's how much control this one girl had over me.. And she knew it, and used it.
That's what "taking it slow" or going the "friends route" can do for you. It can **** you up in the head like I was.
And what's even worse, is that the whole time, I was coming here. Not only was I coming here, I KNEW what i was doing wrong when i was doing it, I just couldn't stop it. She was like a freakin parasite.. calling and calling and taking up my time like a freakin leech. One day while at work, I couldn't get payroll done in time, meaning people didn't get paid on time, because she was having "BF problems" and "had to talk to me" all freakin day.. and my dumbass sat there and talked her "though her problems".. only to have her get in the same **** the next week. I had never been so embarrased as when I had to make an excuse to my employees to why they wren't paid on time.. I stayed there all night on a friday and personally delivered each check to my employees the next morning, because they earned it.
And what's so sad now.. I'm the farthest thing from an AFC as could be now... I don't even act like that towards her.. haven't for a while... Now.. she has REAL issues, which is part of the reason my head was so ****ed up.. nothing I could do was ever good enough in her eyes, she couldn't leave her coke head BF... How would you feel if you made something out of yourself, ,at a young age, have all of the things that young people want, and this girl looks at you and says "humm.. that's nice and all, but I still like my coke head BF, who I admit isn't that attractive, ,better than you"
It took me years to realize that hey, she's the one with the problem. Not me
She had started toc ome around. The ironic thing is, by the time she started to come around, being with her was the equivlant to being with injected with ebola.. I might as well kill myself now to get it over with.. her BF tired.. twice.. I used to laugh at him... she's that bad, and I'll leave it at that.
Just to give you a sample of a normal ass day dealing with this girl.. One day, close to when we stopped talking for good.. I get a call on a Thursday night, which is party night for me. I was playing my cousin in a football game, and I get a call. She is "scared" because her dad is passed out drunk on the couch, and.. they have.... problems with each other, and I'll just leave it at that.
Mind you, she knows I go out on thursdays, so she calls and keeps dropping hints like "I really don't want to be here by myself" and "I wish I had somewhere to go"..
Mind you, I know what she is doing, but I'll be damned.. I was going out that night, she has other friends, she can call them.
But she kept going, so I eventually said "look babe, come over here, I was going out, but of course I don't want to see you get hurt or be scared for your life if you don't need to be" (her mom was out of town)
So she calls me and says she is on her way over my house... I don't get a call back.
A couple of hours past.. by now, I"m pissed because not only did she not come, I didn't go out. I make a sacrifice, mind you that I didn't want to make, because I know her, and I know what was goign to happen, but friend or not, I'm not going to let her be at home with her dad, I couldn't live with myself, even if she was crying wolf.
So I get a call about 4 in the morning, telling me she is over this guys house she is talking to, and about how he was all over her and all of this stuff..
Now.. the other guy I don't mind, like I said, by this point, actually dating her was out of the question... But.. the least this girl could have done was to call me and say "hey, I found somewhere else to go, you can go out".. you think I would have given a damn? And when I call her on it, she starts going in this whining routine about how "she is so confused" and she "doesn't know why she does the stuff she does"... That was one of the last times we had a real conversation, because she had went above and beyond on that one.. i slowly started distancing myself from her, a nd this is after she started coming around.
But let me stop about her.
This isnt' about her
This is about you.
I don't want you to go though what I had to go though, because reading the materials here is only half of it.
You think people who smoke don't think smoking is bad for them? Yet they do it anyway. same as drug users, people who j ackoff too much.. etc..
Alot has to do with will power, and with her I had none. The best thing I coudl have did was move on. I feel so much more rejuvinated, I only have to deal with my crap, not hers.
Same with you... Just move on.. it will hurt at first, but trust me, just let it go
