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Do you drive or meet for a coffee date?

What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.

You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Starman

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huh? I always drive..I end the coffee date like in 5-10 minutes so as to avoid the monotany..then I either go for a walk with the chick or take her to a local bar to have a few drinks (god bless alcohol)

my coffee date switcharoo into a bar scene tends to leave the chick with a more memorable experience (i.e. feeling the buzz of alcohol and associating the good feeling with hanging out with you) and a bar allows a more upbeat , relaxed atmosphere to apply kino

after a few drinks..I end it..and offer to drive her home
 

The Business Man

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On a first date I usually meet for coffee and I go for a walk afterwards, or maybe a flea market or something interesting.

You need to learn not to have set rules for yourself, and just go by what seems to be the best choice at the time. In my case, I don't feel like driving 15 miles to bring a girl to a coffee shop, when it's just up the street from me. Especially if I don't know if she is worth my time.

I agree with Starman though, on leaving the place in 5-10 minutes or so. Sometimes you really have to be on your game though... Some girls won't shut up!
 

DJ_Dork

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If she lives close to the meet, then tell her to meet. If she doesn't then drive her. She doesn't care and you shouldn't either.
 
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I use coffee dates to get her life story outta her and that takes as long as she has words and experiences.

After the coffee date it's either to my place or I go home alone depending on the chemistry.

The coffee date should be used to find out all you can about "her". When I seduce I go for the woman's mind. When you control the mind you control the pu*ssy. And a womans mind is her greatest sexual organ.

Yes yet another one of my f*cking emails as example of getting into the mind




This is yet another reason why I am so drawn to you. Your appreciation for these things are so important to me. It is amazing that you actually are drawn to the same things I am. I don't think I have been able to share these interests with anyone else. I have had great spiritual discussions with people but never really saw eye to eye with them and mostly debated issues more than shared an appreciation for like things. It is odd that you and I have the same destiny numbers. The mirroring of our astrological charts my sister in law was talking about seems to prove itself as time goes on. I think evidence of that is in the fact that we get along so well in every possible way.

*************

Over coffee you have too much opportunity to get deep into her head and learn about "her" her beliefs...religion..philosophies...you can't do this in a cheap and superficial invironment like a night club since the music is so loud.

Over coffee you have a chance to use "destiny" as why you two met...women love that shyt.

Over coffee you have a chance to learn what you need to win this woman over and seduce her mind so that you can have the pleasure of her body.

I believe that when you cut it too short you make yourself look cheap and superficial as if you have no game or convo. If you attempt the take-away too soon you come off only wanting to "rut" instead of get to know the person. I'm not saying that you won't get laid....but I'd rather have her sober and knowing exactly what I'm going and doing to her when we "make love" than have her falling down drunk or sloppy.

I need her full attention to take her to that place. Women with alot of alky in them have trouble reaching a climax and I can't have that in my world....

This is just how I feel about coffee dates.
 

LowPlainsDrifter

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If you have a car, then drive.
If no car, then walk to the coffee date.
 

Starman

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How is sitting in a coffee room listening to a woman babble on about her life considered "getting into her mind"?

#1 You are wasting your time collecting a life story from a woman who you may or may not ever see again on a first date.

#2 You run the risk of being her emotional tampon right off the bat.

#3 The only types of women that are into deep philosophical talks and discussions are the older women 35+

younger women are there to meet you and have some fun (and get a glimpse of how fun, wild and crazy you are as a guy and how she would want to continue this and learn more about you)

I never said go to a nightclub with loud music..but rather a trendy local bar..or some placed more relaxed than a coffee shop interview..

at bars , you also have the chance to interact with others (social proof..and showing her that you are a social animal..rather than sitting at a coffee shop watching people bury their faces in the laptops or books)

The coffee date to bar switcharoo is intended to meet at a safe designated place (really who the hell likes to drink coffee and chit chat???)

so once you establish some rapport..and feel comfortable with each other..you change the scenery to something more action packed and relaxed

I would like some of you who go out on coffee dates to try this out..its worked for me in the past
 

ZeeOwl

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Originally posted by Starman
#3 The only types of women that are into deep philosophical talks and discussions are the older women 35+
Actually, most of the women I date are 35+ :D
so once you establish some rapport..and feel comfortable with each other..you change the scenery to something more action packed and relaxed

I would like some of you who go out on coffee dates to try this out..its worked for me in the past
Sounds like an interesting concept though... I'll give it a try with my next victim... er... prospect ;)
 
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Starman Here is the answers your seeking:

YOU SAID:

]How is sitting in a coffee room listening to a woman babble on about her life considered "getting into her mind"?


MY ANSWER:
1. How do you get into your clients heads to help them…take them to a bar or do you sit and convo with them and guide the conversation.

YOU SAID:

#1 You are wasting your time collecting a life story from a woman who you may or may not ever see again on a first date.

MY ANSWER:

1. This is why you want her life story so that you can determine if she is worthy or not. Why waste money taking her out to a bar and buying her drinks trying to get her drunk when she doesn’t have the brains of an ice-cube?

YOU SAID:

#2 You run the risk of being her emotional tampon right off the bat.

MY ANSWER:

You may run the risk but I manage my convo’s. I have never ran into this type of risk because of the person that I am inside. Your either a symp or not. That is also why you manage the convo. That means direct and control it…just as you would with one of your clients.


YOU SAID:
#3 The only types of women that are into deep philosophical talks and discussions are the older women 35+

MY ANSWER:

The girl in that email is 28. Below is another one from someone who is 24:


I understand...and it makes sense...now. But I have one question...and please don't think I'm being pushy...if you are so attracted to me why do you only see me once a week? I sense that you are keeping me at a distance because you are afraid of something...what I haven't figured out yet. I'm not asking for an exclusive relationship with you unless that's what you want, but what I am asking for is for you to try to open up to me. That turns me on more than anything. Also, close friendships are very important to me.

I am willing to learn anything and everything you are willing to teach me, both in and out of the bedroom. I know I have a lot to learn about making love, simply because you are the first person that has ever wanted to make love to me instead of just have sex.

You have a very ceative mind. Good luck with your idea, I hope it works out for you. I would be very interested to find out how it goes.

Have a great day, and come home safe.

This email is the result of getting into her head over coffee. I was telling her about kissing and it's effects and telling her about making love vs rutting like sheep. She is also the one I mentioned last week who wrote to me on email that I am the first person who ever asked about her past and she was hoping that it didn't scare me away.

YOU SAID:

younger women are there to meet you and have some fun (and get a glimpse of how fun, wild and crazy you are as a guy and how she would want to continue this and learn more about you)

MY ANSWER:

See above! It’s not even about age. Women of all ages want the same thing. And that’s no lie or joke either.

YOU SAID:

I never said go to a nightclub with loud music..but rather a trendy local bar..or some placed more relaxed than a coffee shop interview..


MY ANSWER:

I wasn’t attacking you. I wasn’t saying your doing anything wrong. That is why I said “this is how I” ect…ect.. I was only referring to how I do things and my beliefs.

YOU SAID:

at bars , you also have the chance to interact with others (social proof..and showing her that you are a social animal..rather than sitting at a coffee shop watching people bury their faces in the laptops or books)

MY ANSWER:

When I convo. The only person I see is the person in front of me. I give her my unselfish unwavering attention so that I can figure out what motivates her, so that I can motovate her into what I want.

YOU SAID:

The coffee date to bar switcharoo is intended to meet at a safe designated place (really who the hell likes to drink coffee and chit chat???)

MY ANSWER:

I don’t drink coffee as much as maybe a mocha, iced tea (it’s cali weather), soda or even plain bottled water..it’s just a quaint place to meet and learn about that person.

YOU SAID:

so once you establish some rapport..and feel comfortable with each other..you change the scenery to something more action packed and relaxed

MY ANSWER:

As I stated usually I change it to my place or I go home alone. If she is down for me then she will come over. If she isn’t feeling me then she goes home alone and maybe If I am really interested then she might get another date…usually when this happens they will invite me over to their place since they feel more comfortable.

My goal is to turn her so much on to me that she will only want to close the deal. I am very successful at this as my proof has shown. Women know within a few minutes of meeting you whether or not your getting the p*ussy or not. I am only interviewing them to see if they are worthy of what I have to offer.

This is what I mean by reverse the game. I already know when she accepts a coffee date with me that she is buying. But I’m not completely sold yet…she has to sell herself to me and that is the attitude that I take. That is why I don’t get used as an emotional tampon or symped out into buying her drinks. I was serious when I said I expect them to buy my drink.

YOU SAID:

I would like some of you who go out on coffee dates to try this out..its worked for me in the past

MY ANSWER:

Yes your style will work just fine Starman. I see no problems with it. It’s just not my way. If I am going to bring a woman to my bed, I want to know everything I can about her before I give her this gift. I also need the intel to motovate and teach her. I need to know what kind of person she is..who she has been with…why she isn’t with them…what type of woman she is…how did she treat her last man….how does she respond to sensuality….everything that I can think of. You feel me. My way may not be the right way but it works for me you know what I’m saying.
 

What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.

You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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In answer to the original question. It doesn't matter if you meet or drive her. I prefer to have her pick me up so that it show's her interest level.

When I do the coffee thing I will make it for much much longer than a quick 5-10 minutes because that doesn't even give you enough time to get comfortable.

Coffee houses are nice social places. Bar's are loud social places. I preffer the nice social places without distractions of people talking loud...glasses...dart games...pool games...ect ect.

It all depends on the person. Even though I am a major player, I still prefer to be real instead of superficial with people. That is why I want her undivided attention and will return the same.

How you start something is how you will end it. If you start with chaos of running around and loud noises and action it will end the same way...loud noises lot's of action ect ..ect..

I think personally that the convo should be allowed to flow. And not be on some tight time schedule. See Eddie Griffins video out on certain people and how they are always counting and on tight time tables and stuff like that.

There is a zen saying "The way you do anything is the way you do everything"

Now apply a tight time schedule to sex! Now imagine these words in spoken in one of those uptight caucasian accountant nasely voices: "Ok susie..it's now 1:30am I an going to shag with you for approximately 5.8 minutes since you are a HB 5.8 and I will consumate this by giving you a kiss for about 3.5 seconds since that is the length of my dyck and now let's begin 1234...oww that's was good...yes that was very good..."

My point is don't watch the clock let it flow! I understand that most of the fella's on this forum are intelligent men and the need to count things such as hb 9.8 or hb 7.5 is still the mode, but counting the seconds to end a coffee meeting so you can shuffle her to the next technique on the roster is funny.
 

The_Mole

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i used to follow your posts careful player supreme but it always messed me up. I let the girl drive me, it feels like shes a schoeffer and from that moment on, her interest level dropped with me. other dates, I ask quite a number of eliciting questions, i scared the girl aways because she gets bored.
 
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This is a little off topic, but I wanted to add this to this thread since a certain person doesn't think much of coffee houses. I just got this in one of my eboxes from one of those dating guru's wayne something or another:

============================================
HOW TO MEET WOMEN IN COFFEE SHOPS
============================================

So Wayne, why coffee shops? Can I really meet
beautiful girls there?

The reason coffee shops are one of my top
places to meet girls is because MANY single women go
there to read, and plus... they are usually by
themselves, and quite open to having a conversation
wiht someone interesting.

chris, you've simply got to try this out
for yourself. I've met several girlfriends, and many
great girls to just have fun with (I'm sure you know
what I mean).

But how do you meet women in coffee shops? Well
one of the big keys is WHERE you sit. Most coffee shops
have an area that has nice soft, cushy chairs to relax
on. If your local one doesn't, then find another one
(I'm serious).

Around my area, there's a place called "Panera
Bread", and they have a little area with 3 big soft
leather chairs, a coffee table to put your stuff on,
and a nice fireplace.

This is the perfect area to sit, because if a
woman sits down in that area, there's a very high
chance that she's just there to hang out, or just read.
And since you're practically sitting together, it's
very easy to comment on just about anything to get the
conversation started.

You can comment on something she's wearing, the
weather outside, the temperature of the room, what book
she's reading, etc. It doesn't matter... what does
matter is that you just get your foot in the door.

It's also a really good idea to carry
interesting things with you to the coffee shops. Some
of my favorite things to bring are:

* A big book that says "Handwriting Analysis" on it.

* A deck of Tarot Cards.

* A bunch of pictures of single women that I can go
through in front of her (and ask her which one she
things I should go out with... this is fun to do. I
talk about this in my book "Seven Magic Words").

* Any kind of interesting, and portable game or puzzle.
(oh the puzzle one is powerhouse, because you can ask
for her help in solving it).

If you don't know how to do Handwriting
Analysis or Tarot, then pick something else that you
can learn. Trust me, once you get the hang of it,
starting up conversations in coffee shops is very easy.

Also, make sure you get to know the employees
that work there. They can be a huge help in introducing
you to people, and letting you know when good bands are
coming in to play (which will make the place full of
women).

Make sure you check out at least 5 coffee shops
before you decide on which one you like the best. This
will take a little bit of time on your part, but it's
well worth it. Plus, if you become a regular, you'll
get to meet the other regulars, and some of them are
bound to either be single, or have single friends that
they will bring along sometime.

So get out there, and start checking out your
local coffee shops. The best time to go is around
lunchtime, or between 6-8pm. Coffee shops usually get
crowded around that time, and so your chances of
meeting some nice girls is much higher.
 

WestCoaster

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As usual, Player Supreme delivers the goods!

Great post Player, but I'm usually not moving as fast as you -- probably because I'm not a fast mover and not in your league. Oh well. But I've opted for the coffee date of late and had much better success.

Lots of plusses:

1. You don't drop a ton of money. At Starbucks, about $7 will get you a pair of fancy coffees.

2. Women love coffee and coffee houses.

3. Caffine gets them conversing -- but like Player said, control the convo! A lot like to blab on and on.

4. No big attachments or commitments with the coffee date.

5. It's non-threatening. So many women are worked up about what's threatening (too serious) and what isn't. Dinner can wait after I get the assessment over a mocha.

Lots of plusses for the coffee date, atmosphere, low price, positive atmosphere, etc. IMO, it's an excellent first date.
 

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

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