Did I screw this up?

[WhitePimp]

Alright I asked a chick I talk to in my class out. She said she had a boyfriend. A few weeks later on V Day she asks what Im doing and I tell her nothing really. She then says she's doing nothing because she broke up with her boyfriend.

I'm just wondering if I should've asked her out for Monday night(I didnt have my car or any money then so going out was not really an option) and to be honest, I thought jumping at the chance to go out VDay would just look way too desperate.

I asked her out again today for Friday but she was going to see one of her friends she hasnt seen in awhile(she mentioned the friend first)

I'm thinking this chick really dug me, but the whole VDay thing dropped her interest. If I ask her out one more time, it'll be to come to a blues jam I play at next Wednesday. Should I ask her out again or am I too far into non interest zone? If I get rejected a 3rd time by this chick, I'll look like such a jackass but I do genuinely think she has interest for me.

 

[Dapper Swindler]

My opinion:

She didn't go out with you the first time because she was probably telling the truth about having a boyfriend.

She called you because she was alone and desperate on Valentine's Day. She remembered you had asked her out once before and wanted to use you to cure her blues.

She was probably telling the truth about going out with her friends, but she wasn't willing to cancel them either. What day of the week did you ask?

My conclusion: she doesn't seem to like you that much. If you had asked her out on Valentine's Day it's obvious that she would have said yes. It looks like that is why she called you. Yes, you would have seemed desperate as well to jump at the chance. But it would have been a guaranteed thing. I would have done it, but some people here might not have.

I think you should try asking her out again. People usually have plans on weekends unless you ask them early.

 

[WhitePimp]

She didnt call me about the Valentine's thing, she asked me casually in class what I was doing, and THEN told me about her boyfriend. I thought she was just curious about my plans that night.

I asked her today about this Friday so that is onyl two days away and she said it was a friend she hadn't seen in a real long time so I'm guessing she was pretty honest with that one.

I'm just going to casually ask her to come to this blues jam thing Wednesday and if she can't, **** her...

 

[Don_Joffe]

Why put yourself through the pain barrier?
She said "no" because she was taken.
She said "yes" when she was free.
She said "no" because she was busy.

Basically, she is USING you for fun.
Sure, you could probably get a date out of her and a kiss, she is going to play you though.
Dont ask her again, wait for her to hint to you she wants to see you.
OTHERWISE, NEXT HER. She is a waste of time.

 

[DeathDealer]

Let me tell you this right now. If a girl is truly interested in hanging out with you or even seeing you as friends. She'll ASK or suggest on hanging out.

I had one of my exes call me a lot turning thanksgiving and christmas a year ago - I thought she wanted to hang out with me but she would always say "oh, I have this vacation going on in about 2 weeks. gotta be busy for awhile" or etc. After awhile I kinda knew her only intention was just getting attention.

Basically the girl is looking for attention, and you gave it to her.

 

[WhitePimp]

Yeah...I figured as much. I really don't think I made myself look too bad but I think I'm not going to advance anymore unless she asks me(which I do believe is possible). I knew something didnt feel right with it

 

[JazzPimpNYC]

Don't even advance if she does approach you. She's a desperate user and cares nothing for you. Show some dignity and lose her for good, unless you want to be taken for a wild emotional roller-coaster that ultimately leads to rejection and hurt feelings. Its inevitable. Move on.

 

[ahh69]

She maybe throwing in hints that she wants to hang out with you and genuinely can't but if you do get it going with her to some extent even on a friends level..

Don't make the mistake of getting even semi serious or anything with her.. You'll end up flat on your face especially after her last breakup being just recently..

Ask her once more and making it during the week when you think she'd be less likely to be busy.. even if its just on the spot for a coffee or something maybe?

 

[WhitePimp]

I honestly don't think this girl is a user, but I am not going to advance anymore anyway. I've got other opportunities and I don't feel like chasing someone who's only half interested.

 

[tmpgstx]

And .. i bet her friend she is seeing is a guy.

 

[JazzPimpNYC]

You also have to act responsibly by not taking advantage of her in this vulnerable position she's in. She may be struggling with the breakup. Truth is, she will rebound. Don't get involved; you'll be doing both of you a favor.

 

[Engetsu]

You know what, I actually agree with what you are intending on doing.

Everyone here is overanalyzing...
What do you guys know about how hard she is taking her breakup?
What do you guys know about the situation they were in while their conversations were taking place?
What do you guys know about how casual they are together?
What do you guys know about how all women are and how they all ask guys they like out instantly? Many girls will NEVER make the first move, by principle or by shyness... Either way, we have no idea of what is going on in this case.

WhitePimp, you should just give her a call and invite her out... not on a Friday... not on a Saturday... but on a weekday night... and go grab a coffee and display romantic interest in her, since you already have a conversational basis with her.

If she politely declines your invitation, then politely forget about her. That's it.

 

[stalluproar]

"You wouldn't go out with me last time, now it is your turn to take me out. Pick me up at 7"

It seemed like she had a sliver of interest, but lost it because you didn't have the wit at the moment.