did I handle this one right?

[Burnover]

I've done the obligatory serarch and found nothing like what I'm looking for, so I was wondering if I could get a few pointers on this situation:

Okay, the deal is that I met this chick at work. Yes, I know "don't dip in the company ink" but being a contract employee for a large medical organization it's not like I directly have to work with her. I float just about everywhere.

Skipping to the pertainent stuff, she could lose a little weight but the personality more than made up for it. Lately, once when we went out and a couple days later when I dropped by her depertment to say 'hi', she was very upset about her job, complaining, and generally not acting like she once did. Finally the second time this happened I just left and haven't looked back.

I'm not sure if I would be able to salvage the situation anyway as I know I was headed towards friend-zone unless I got her alone, applied kino, etc. More than anything I'm curious what to do with chicks that are angry about a situation that I'm not involved in. I know it's not my deal to fix her problems, but is there any way to have handled this other than 'next'?

 

[quest]

Originally posted by Burnover
I've done the obligatory serarch and found nothing like what I'm looking for, so I was wondering if I could get a few pointers on this situation:

Okay, the deal is that I met this chick at work. Yes, I know "don't dip in the company ink" but being a contract employee for a large medical organization it's not like I directly have to work with her. I float just about everywhere.

Skipping to the pertainent stuff, she could lose a little weight but the personality more than made up for it. Lately, once when we went out and a couple days later when I dropped by her depertment to say 'hi', she was very upset about her job, complaining, and generally not acting like she once did. Finally the second time this happened I just left and haven't looked back.

I'm not sure if I would be able to salvage the situation anyway as I know I was headed towards friend-zone unless I got her alone, applied kino, etc. More than anything I'm curious what to do with chicks that are angry about a situation that I'm not involved in. I know it's not my deal to fix her problems, but is there any way to have handled this other than 'next'? Furthermore given that I'm not planning on calling anymore, if she was to initiate contact with me what would be the best way to continue where I left off? Or is it just better to move on regardless?

sounds like a bit of one-itus..
firstly, u say she's a bit to big. and later on she's whinging and unhappy.
yet u still want to hang around?

note- in the past i've made posts similar to this.. and they all end with

"you know what to do"

its true. move on. go meet a more attractive girl, who has an even better personality.

 

[Burnover]

You're right, the original posting did make it seem that way, so I edited it to be more clear. Her personality was a major positive, so when the attitude went sour my IL went with it...

My main thing is to see how to handle that specific situation. When a chick does start getting that way, what's the best thing to do / say?

 

[-HPNOTIQ-]

Why next her? Maybe she just had a death in the family. Maybe she just lost her job. Maybe she is genuinely going over some tough times.

To ignore a person and neglect someone just because they are going through tough times says more about YOUR character rather than theirs.

If all you want to do is bang her...then stop reading this post.

If you want to be a person of good character who may ulitmately end up banging her...do this:

At your next encounter with her, just ask her that you've noticed she's been down in the dumps and that you want to take her out for drinks after work to get away from the stress.

BECOME THE ANTI-EVERYTHING that is causing her stress. Be her freedom from her stress filled world. Be her confident male. Be that awesome guy that everyone wants to be around. Don't complain with her...don't say that your work sucks, that your family life sucks, that you hate life...ACCENTUATE THE POSITIVES OF YOUR LIFE.

Understand this, you are treading through thin waters between that LJBF zone and being that confident FB. To differentiate from that man who is just an emotional tampon she can cling to, you have to not be needy, desperate and always available to her. Give and take.

Go out for drinks..have a good time..listen to her problems..give good advice..keep the convo sexually charged with tons of kino, c/f..all the good stuff. Everything you would do on a normal date.

Then take it away and let her return back to her problems.

I guarantee, that when her problems start getting to her again, she'll call you back for some GOOD TIMES. But remember, these good times are all on your terms now. When, who, what, where, how much...these are all up to you now.

But most importantly...don't become clingy, insecure, or desperate...keep being that great challenge..its human nature to desire the things we cannot have.

Being that confident man that is on top of his game is the thing women desire...you being the challenge is that thing she must have.

 

[Burnover]

I know what the situation is, she's tired of being treated like crap at work. I can't blame her for being upset.

My issue with continuing down this road is, I always used to try to help with issues with this. And I would end up being the emotional tampon and fully in LJBF zone, as you implied there is a significant risk for.

 

[-HPNOTIQ-]

Guys here take that "emotional tampon" badge and hate wearing it. Let me spin doctor this one for you bro.

How about if you are that SUPER SEXUALLY CHARGE EMOTIONAL TAMPON that she can talk to about her feelings, yet, knows that is a man desired by many women. This is a somewhat funny parallel...but think of yourself as JOEY on the tv show Friends.

Women desired him, he was confident, ****y/funny, was an emotional tampon that women talked to about their problems...but he always ended in bed with them...why? Because, all those women knew where he stood. He wasn't a sappy, clingy guy himself.

Like I stated earlier. Offer to take this girl out for some drinks. Be an emotional tampon for her..but...YOU HAVE YOUR MOTIVES. The way to stay out of that LJBF zone is to not be clingy and always available to her.

Human nature bro...we all desire the things we can't have. You have to give her JUST ENOUGH of the good stuff...then take it away.

I know you might be worried about that LJBF zone. So you can just sit home wondering and thinking 'what if'...or you can role the dice and take a chance.

Personally, I never had a ONS when I sat on my ass doing nothing. Hesitation leads to masturbation bro.