Desdinova
Master Don Juan
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- Nov 15, 2004
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There is a fine line between dependancy and support. So let's get these two defined first:
Dependancy
When someone gets lazy in the relationship and relies on the other person to make up for their laziness
or
To rely on someone to make up for their own inabilities.
Support
To encourage someone, or assisting them to reach a positive attitude, destination, or goal.
When you're in any kind of relationship with a woman, be it short term or long term, you should be with them because you desire to be with them; not because you NEED to be with them.
Just look at the relationships around you. You'll see a lot of dependancy in them. Some examples of things people become dependant on:
Sex, "love", cooking, cleaning, money, organization
Dependancy doesn't necessarily happen to one person, it can happen to the both of them.
One will depend on the other for "love"
One will depend on the other for household chores
A lot of people will tell you that dependancy will strengthen the relationship because it will help the two of you work together. They're wrong. Dependancy will help it break down. It will cause too much strain on the other person, and the two will drift apart. The only thing keeping them together is their dependancy on each other. Couples who are miserable together have one thing in common: dependancy.
If the person being dependant doesn't feel they're have having their "needs" fulfilled, they will begin demanding more, or, being even more dependant. This will increase the load on the other person, and they will become overwhelmed by trying to support this need for two people.
Here's an example. One person becomes dependant on the other for cleanliness. The person being relied on is not only cleaning their own mess, they're cleaning the mess of someone else. The burden becomes heavier.
One will also have a difficult time loving themselves if they're constantly giving love to someone else.
If both parties focus on keeping their independance, the burdens will be lighter, and stress will be low.
It is very important that you keep your eyes open and be aware of your woman becoming dependant on you. If you allow her to become dependant, your load is going to continue to get heavier. She'll become even more dependant on you, making you a miserable piece of 5hit.
Keep your independance. Make her keep hers. The two of you will function much better together.
Being independant of each other doesn't mean that you don't work together. Work with her to arrange your schedules to make time for each other. However, if one person begins making ALL the sacrifices for their time, the other is becoming dependant on that flexibility.
Any relationship is a great balancing scale. Beware of it becoming too heavy on one side. If it does, you may have a problem with dependancy.
Dependancy
When someone gets lazy in the relationship and relies on the other person to make up for their laziness
or
To rely on someone to make up for their own inabilities.
Support
To encourage someone, or assisting them to reach a positive attitude, destination, or goal.
When you're in any kind of relationship with a woman, be it short term or long term, you should be with them because you desire to be with them; not because you NEED to be with them.
Just look at the relationships around you. You'll see a lot of dependancy in them. Some examples of things people become dependant on:
Sex, "love", cooking, cleaning, money, organization
Dependancy doesn't necessarily happen to one person, it can happen to the both of them.
One will depend on the other for "love"
One will depend on the other for household chores
A lot of people will tell you that dependancy will strengthen the relationship because it will help the two of you work together. They're wrong. Dependancy will help it break down. It will cause too much strain on the other person, and the two will drift apart. The only thing keeping them together is their dependancy on each other. Couples who are miserable together have one thing in common: dependancy.
If the person being dependant doesn't feel they're have having their "needs" fulfilled, they will begin demanding more, or, being even more dependant. This will increase the load on the other person, and they will become overwhelmed by trying to support this need for two people.
Here's an example. One person becomes dependant on the other for cleanliness. The person being relied on is not only cleaning their own mess, they're cleaning the mess of someone else. The burden becomes heavier.
One will also have a difficult time loving themselves if they're constantly giving love to someone else.
If both parties focus on keeping their independance, the burdens will be lighter, and stress will be low.
It is very important that you keep your eyes open and be aware of your woman becoming dependant on you. If you allow her to become dependant, your load is going to continue to get heavier. She'll become even more dependant on you, making you a miserable piece of 5hit.
Keep your independance. Make her keep hers. The two of you will function much better together.
Being independant of each other doesn't mean that you don't work together. Work with her to arrange your schedules to make time for each other. However, if one person begins making ALL the sacrifices for their time, the other is becoming dependant on that flexibility.
Any relationship is a great balancing scale. Beware of it becoming too heavy on one side. If it does, you may have a problem with dependancy.