"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Cute girl I liked got mate-guarded last night at a party. Did I do the right thing?

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Thanks to COVID, haven't gone to many events like this in recent memory so it was fun to deal with this even if it was a lost opportunity.

I share the car with my housemate and we attend the same church - both of these were connected to nearby parishoners. He drops me at Party #1, great time, I mingle with new people and invited a couple of friends. Lately I've noticed the "talk-to-other-men" tactic works well, since the ladies like it when you're not attending an event just to hit on them. Good 50/50 mix, met a lot of men and women (actually had an awkward situation where a woman I'm pretty sure was seeing someone was hitting on me - so I had to deal with that politely).

Ended up getting carted to Party #2 by a woman who's cute and pretty similar to me, we had a good conversation on the way over. Was unsure if I should keep talking to her, as she was pretty cool but I was getting more of a friend vibe and she's a pretty big regular at these gatherings. I immediately ended the conversation when I arrived and talked to a bunch of new people, assuming she'd at some point come back to me. She spoke for a while to one of the guys who was hosting the party, then came and sat with a bunch of her peers later (all men).

Sadly, this second gathering she was the only young adult single woman at, but I kept my distance for a while. I myself ended up talking to the same host she'd stopped speaking with (we began talking about foodie stuff) and she invited herself into our conversation when we got on a subject she was interested in. About thirty minutes go by and I realize I like the conversation, but I kind of want to meet other people at this point, so I make a lame excuse and end up not coming back. I ended up talking with a completely different group, which was fine with me, as I like meeting new people at a big thing like this. She never left the host guy and spoke to him for the entire rest of the gathering, all the way through the end right up until everyone had left.

I had a fun night and definitely don't regret much, but I get the feeling here I really didn't know what to do, and decided to just not stress myself out on a night where I wanted to kick back. What exactly *do* I do in a situation like this? The guy quite literally never left her side or steered her to a larger group of people, and the only way I'd have gotten to talk to her more is if I had that same three-way conversation the rest of the night. I thought she was plenty cute, but didn't like her nearly enough to waste an evening on her or compete with another guy for her.

I'm kind of torn on whether her barging into my conversation with the host was her making an excuse to talk to me, or her making an excuse to talk to *him*. I can definitely say I'm better looking (haha) but he was unusually good conversation. He seemed like the type to be afraid to make a move, though - for his sake, I hope he did.
 
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“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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