Could not get it up... Need some encouragement

[SoonToBeDJ]

Hey guys, I've searched through the threads for stuff on my problem, but I need some honest encouragement for myself. I could not get erect or stay erect. Keep in mind I am a virgin.

I met a girl at a club and we were dancing and making out I noticed I wasn't ready like I should be or have been by that time since I was grinding and stuff with other chics before her. I take her back to the place and still the same so I try to delay it and do the whole foreplay and make out and everything and she's begging for it.

I notice I'm still not ready even after going down on her and her returning the favor and stuff. So I give her an excuse that I think shes so hot and stuff and that I'm a little nervous thus I'm not ready.

After getting somewhere after a bj I think I'm good enough to put on the condom and go in and then I should be okay after feeling everything first. I didn't make it. I went soft. A few minutes later after more foreplay and stuff we tried again and the same thing happened.

I'm a virgin and that happened to me. The whole weekend I did drink a lot more than usual and that night I did drink, but I was alright. I was also on very little sleep from the past few days going to sleep late. When I was dancing earlier that night I was erect then it went away. Is there something wrong with me? What should I do? Until now I still don't have the "ready to go" feeling I normally have.

Can I get some advice or words of encouragement? I am really worried and disturbed by this. I mean my first time and I'm 21 and this happens? What do I do?

 

[oakraiderz2]

1) Thats what alcohol does.
2) You were probably nervous prior to getting her home. Youre thoughts about not being able to get it up added an additional amount of unnecessary pressure which resulted in nothing.

#1 has happened to me while ive been inside of chicks. Its much better when youre sober...unless youre nervous.

#1 + #2 = No dice

Dont drink, relax, and handle it.

 

[SoonToBeDJ]

I have read that masturbating too much could make that happen and while I don't think I do it a lot it I'm going to decrease it. That's the thing though, before I could get erect whenever by watching porn and stuff and right now I just don't have the urge and I don't think I could do it if I wanted to.

As far as being nervous, I was so surprised how calm I was throughout the whole night. I've gotten nervous before from just simple stuff because I am thinking about my inexperience and age and size, but this time I was really calm. Maybe there was too much liquor in my system from the previous day and stuff, but what I said above about having the urge thing is weird.

She was real cool about the whole thing, but when parting ways I could tell she wasn't happy. We both thought I could get it going before we had to go. I don't think so though.

I just feel like total crap. It's like finally I get a chance and this happens. When will I get another chance? Will the bad happen again? Ugh

I do appreciate your guys input for sure.

 

[AKA FLEX]

Can you get an erection without any problems when masturbating? If so, your problem is all in your head.

This problem can be a tough one to conquer, since your impotence if left unchecked can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. You start thinking, "I couldn't get it up last time, what if I can't get it up this time..." and your anxiety keeps you from getting aroused.

The best thing you can do is not even think about your penis when you're messing around with your girl. Think about her cooch, how good it tastes, how incredible her breasts feel, how she brings out the animal in you and makes you want to pull her hair and smack her azz, shoot long lines of cumm deep inside her, etc. The nastier the thoughts, the better. Just don't think about your johnson and what it's doing.

Alcohol in VERY STRICT MODERATION can actually help a problem like yours, because it will loosen you up and take the edge off. But drink too much, and you're done. Also, you don't want to be dependent on it to the point where it remains a necessity for you to perform.

Good luck and let us know how it goes next time! I'm thinking if you follow my advice and keep your mind where it should be -- on HER -- you will be good to go.

 

[SoonToBeDJ]

I was about to try to masturbate to check and see what happened, but quit right at the beginning. I know waking up with wood is fine and it always happens to me, but hasn't happened since the incident 2 days ago.

Yeah, next time I'm gonna try not to think about it at all which will be damn hard, but I don't have any other options. I just hope it I get another chance sooner rather than later. This hanging over my head sucks.