Conversation Problems

[actionjaxson]

conversation is my biggest problem i dont know what to say. i've been having success with online dating and getting girls on msn but i always run out of things to say. i dont understand why i struggle with this. many times i would purposely avoid a girl because i dont know what to say to her.

heres a few questions i use as starters and i try to build off what they say then thats it.
how are you doing, how was your weekend, what are you doing this weekend, what do you like doing for fun, whats your background, can you cook, can you sing, do you work or go to school.

then when i run out of things to say i pretend i have to go and i'll talk to them later. i read the bible and other threads but im still struggling. i only have alot to say when im drunk.
thanks for your help

 

[02hero]

Don't ask questions that's what strangers do. Make statements.
When you're chatting with your mates you don't interogate them, do you?
Example "That girl is fine", the convo carries on from there.

Do this with women for example "This music is cool" convo carries on

If it goes silent don't worry just stay cool, don't try to think of something to say, she'll probably just blurt out some random **** anyway-convo carries on......

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Ask interesting questions that matter, ones that would illicit two way communication and also provide some information. If you just make a statement she doesn't need to say a thing other "Uh-huh." If you're just going to make a statement you may as well just be just chatting up a rock.

 

[slaog]

You're probably thinking too much because you say you've no problem talking when drunk.

Check out the 'art of gibberish' and 'gift of gab' links in my signature.

EDIT: Communication is not just words. they say words make up 15% of communication with voice tone making up 30% and the rest down to body language. Have a good frame when talking to people and the words will flow. I thnk your problem is that you don't have a good frame and don't see yourself as the prize and thats why you need drink to be able to talk.

 

[Valdez]

try talking about something you are passionate about. Your enthusiasm will show and will get things going.