"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Confrontation

mahon83050

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I don't like confrontation with people, actually who does? I am more of a "if I avoid a situation, maybe it will go away type thing" However, I know I am wrong.

I have a harder time sticking up for myself with people I know (e.g. friends) than I do with complete strangers. If some stranger was disrespecting me, I would usually stick up for myself.

There is a kid I have known my whole life, who has always been an instigator and sort of disrespectful. For some reason, instead of telling the kid off I just roll with the punches and take it. When the other voice tells me to tell him off, another voice tells me to relax and says you are being too sensitive.

I did see an interesting sign on a church that read "He who angers you, controls you."
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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wolf116

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Take a MMA class, it will give you bigger balls. Takes you about a year though. It made my more confident in all areas of my life.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

wolf116

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yeah. I focus on Thai boxing though.

no sh!t, about 2 seconds ago I just heard arguing on the street and this guy was holding this girl down. So I went outside and told him to **** off and he did. I would have never had that confidence 1year ago.

aikido is a start. Just start anything to get yourself fit and flexible. But you need to find a martial art where full contact sparing is allowed. Muay Thai will harden you up nicely.
 

wolf116

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If you like the eastern style martial arts try kyokushin karate.
 

DJDamage

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Actually its a good topic but the one confrontation I want to know more about is how to handle coworkers because unlike people you run into the streets and can simply tell them to fvck off, when you are dealing with coworkers who are a pain in the ass its a whole different story. You got to really think about an appropriate response to different situations either wise your workplace can become an unpleasent environment to work in.

Anybody knows of any good book's that deals specifically with this??
 

God_of_getting_layed

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if its a co worker, just blow up on them and get in their face yelling at the top of your longs. You want to seem like youve snapped and will go crazy and are waiting, just waiting for them to hit you first so you can finish em off.

Usually they go "oops", shut up and then they back down after that and never bother you again. they dont want none. This has worked for me before, all without having to actually fight. What happens is that theyre harrassing you becuase they beleive you "wont do nothing". Its this whole perception that they have that drives the harrassment intself. But once you snap like I suggest, their impression changes and they think "well maybe I underestimated him, he will do something and he seems crazy enough to where hell shed his own blood just to shed mine. I guess I better back off for my own good".
 

Oxide

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I will give you this advice right now: Buy 33 strategies of war

always reply with something when a person is trying to deliberatelly fvck with you. Don't blow your cool, but if someone keeps poking at your shiit, come back with one thing that hurts them, and they will shut up.

Easiest targets:

How they don't have game/girls/haven't gotten laid in forever/are whipped.
Poor athletic skills

Also, throw in, "stop embarassing yourself" if they try to come back after you called them out the first time.

Make sure you are confident in what you are doing here, otherwise you'll get owned
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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MuayThai

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Oxide said:
Also, throw in, "stop embarassing yourself" if they try to come back after you called them out the first time.

Make sure you are confident in what you are doing here, otherwise you'll get owned
Good insult skills are teh win.


"He who angers you, controls you."

Bleh, fags. "He who has broken nose, fears you"
 

mahon83050

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Oxide said:
I will give you this advice right now: Buy 33 strategies of war

always reply with something when a person is trying to deliberatelly fvck with you. Don't blow your cool, but if someone keeps poking at your shiit, come back with one thing that hurts them, and they will shut up.

Easiest targets:

How they don't have game/girls/haven't gotten laid in forever/are whipped.
Poor athletic skills

Also, throw in, "stop embarassing yourself" if they try to come back after you called them out the first time.

Make sure you are confident in what you are doing here, otherwise you'll get owned
Yeah, that is where this person gets on my nerves, he is always busting my balls about not getting L**d and all of this stuff.

God of getting layed,

You are right, I usually for some reason don;t seriously get pissed and confron him on it. He probably still does it because he knows I won't do anything.
 
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