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Conflict seeking girl

zoom5

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Hey, I have a problem again:

So I met a girl at a party, we didn't talk much,after added her on fb, asked her out, she said yes, we couldn't find the time to meet up. After that I gave my phone to my friend who I hoped would convince her to go out, but he ended up really annoying and, she kind of got upset.

So now I hear from her 1x a week on messenger. mostly we just troll or insult each other, and kind of find it hard to stop. then we almost argue... and get into really deep debate. We now have a conflictive trolling / arguing thing going on.

So. I'm not like that, but she kind of forces me to be like that. For example I don't understand something and she says i'm stupid. Im not gonna say sorry, im just gonna insult her back and that's gonna start a 5 hr war and 5000 messages.



Should I block her and go on? I mean. I'm not angry when I write with her, kind of enjoy her style ...but it's getting us nowhere.
Also she say's she doesn't care about me, she says that a lot - why do you even continue the conversation and not simply do the "seen" and block me or something??

And Now I'm really upset because she's so damn gorgeous.
 

oldmanofthesea

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So I met a girl at a party, we didn't talk much,after added her on fb, asked her out, she said yes.
Why didn't you talk much at the party? You should focus on talking to women F2F not be shy in-person and then text them later which is weak and doesn't demonstrate confidence.

I gave my phone to my friend who I hoped would convince her to go out, but he ended up really annoying and, she kind of got upset.
Never do this. Are your friends going to lay on the bed with you and tell you how to put it in her? You need to be responsible for yourself.

we couldn't find the time to meet up.
That means she isn't interested. Period.

So now I hear from her 1x a week on messenger. mostly we just troll or insult each other, and kind of find it hard to stop. then we almost argue... and get into really deep debate. We now have a conflictive trolling / arguing thing going on.
She is bored and looking for attention and someone to talk to.

but it's getting us nowhere.
Because talking to you when she's bored is all she wants from you. If she wanted more, she would have found a time to meet you in person.

Also she say's she doesn't care about me, she says that a lot - why do you even continue the conversation and not simply do the "seen" and block me or something??
Because she's bored and sometimes like someone to talk to. Your arguing with her is actually a good thing and is likely the only reason she keeps reaching out to you. Most guys will just agree with whatever a girl says to them. But that's the only thing you've done right here. Unless you are enjoying the conversation and are fine with it not going anywhere, I'd simply ignore her. Be prepared for that to possibly increase her interest, resulting in her reaching out to you more or starting to act like she wants to see you, but odds are she won't actually go through with it and will flake if you do make plans with her. Bottom line, if you want to see her, then end the conversation and if she reaches out again, just respond, "Would love to keep this debate going - let's get drinks Tuesday at 7pm." Anything other than a yes means you ignore, and after waiting a week or so, if she reaches out again, I'd literally copy/paste that same reply.
 

amaterasu

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Why didn't you talk much at the party? You should focus on talking to women F2F not be shy in-person and then text them later which is weak and doesn't demonstrate confidence.


Never do this. Are your friends going to lay on the bed with you and tell you how to put it in her? You need to be responsible for yourself.


That means she isn't interested. Period.


She is bored and looking for attention and someone to talk to.


Because talking to you when she's bored is all she wants from you. If she wanted more, she would have found a time to meet you in person.


Because she's bored and sometimes like someone to talk to. Your arguing with her is actually a good thing and is likely the only reason she keeps reaching out to you. Most guys will just agree with whatever a girl says to them. But that's the only thing you've done right here. Unless you are enjoying the conversation and are fine with it not going anywhere, I'd simply ignore her. Be prepared for that to possibly increase her interest, resulting in her reaching out to you more or starting to act like she wants to see you, but odds are she won't actually go through with it and will flake if you do make plans with her. Bottom line, if you want to see her, then end the conversation and if she reaches out again, just respond, "Would love to keep this debate going - let's get drinks Tuesday at 7pm." Anything other than a yes means you ignore, and after waiting a week or so, if she reaches out again, I'd literally copy/paste that same reply.
Well said!

Plus 1 on this.
 

zoom5

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Why didn't you talk much at the party? You should focus on talking to women F2F not be shy in-person and then text them later which is weak and doesn't demonstrate confidence.
We were both really drunk, she was quiet and shy too... and the music was loud so we kind of didn't have a chance. The next day she was really friendly and flirty kind of...


Never do this. Are your friends going to lay on the bed with you and tell you how to put it in her? You need to be responsible for yourself
Yea, im hitting my head in the wall for this, because her attitude changed after this.


That means she isn't interested. Period.
I declined her 3x. she did 2x


I'd simply ignore her. Be prepared for that to possibly increase her interest, resulting in her reaching out to you more or starting to act like she wants to see you
That's my plan for now like leave her be for 2 weeks I guess ?

Bottom line, if you want to see her, then end the conversation
I ended the conversation yesterday, kind of stopped in the middle so yeah that's the first step...


Okay, so I kind of have a visual of what I did wrong here. The 1M$ question is, why did I made some mistakes I do before?
+ plus im going outta my mind here and I really want to talk to her... So I probably need some distraction or everything will go nowhere.


P.s. Does that even sound normal? Usually if a girl wasn't interested she would just ignore or block... yeah she's bored..but cmon...
 

oldmanofthesea

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Okay, so I kind of have a visual of what I did wrong here. The 1M$ question is, why did I made some mistakes I do before?
+ plus im going outta my mind here and I really want to talk to her... So I probably need some distraction or everything will go nowhere.
My guess would be lack of abundance. If you were doing the work you need to in order to meet and talk to a lot more women, you wouldn't be hanging so much off this one because you'd have 10 others you were talking to and who were actually interested in seeing you.

P.s. Does that even sound normal? Usually if a girl wasn't interested she would just ignore or block... yeah she's bored..but cmon...
It is perfectly normal for women to do this. Why do you so strongly think otherwise? Women crave attention/validation in a way a man will never understand (until he has been burned by it enough times to learn this lesson), ESPECIALLY women under 30. You can thank social media in part for this, but it's always been their nature.
 

zoom5

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because you'd have 10 others you were talking to and who were actually interested in seeing you.
I hade 5 like a month ago.. then I fell into this pit, and every single one get's taken or looses interest. She was the only one left so yeah.. also a lot of people judge me when they know i have more than one. I know. Ignore...but it's weird.. makes me feel like an *******.


It is perfectly normal for women to do this. Why do you so strongly think otherwise?
Because I met a lot of them and most of the time the would argue for some time and leave, ignore or tell me to f**k off... This one... is special... Probably because she's the first person after 5 years... that I said "wooooooow" i mean high school all over again...
She's 22 yeah... so basically childish sometimes.
 

Kotaix

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This is a tough one that you'll have to figure out on your own. IMO, you found someone who is going to at least teach you something, even if it's indirectly. I think she likes you and she's sh!t testing the sh!t out of you. You need to escalate and meet her in person, remember that it's easy to be a keyboard warrior. End the texting bullsh!t and see if you can get along in person.

I think she wants you to utterly dominate her. If she's not crazy, bpd or bigoted you might have actually struck gold. She'll be a huge challenge, but this is the kind of woman that will make you a better person if you can put her in her place, which I think is what she's expecting you to do.

As for the calling you stupid insults, you need to put a stop to it. Look her right in the eye and tell her to show repect, and walk away if she doesn't.
 

zoom5

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I think she likes you and she's sh!t testing the sh!t out of you.
Yeah that I think too. well good to know someone thinks the same.

that it's easy to be a keyboard warrior
My friend (a girl ) was at a party with her 2yrs ago... she was kind of quiet and what my friend said she obeyed... that was her opinion...
So yeah definitely a keyboard warrior


but this is the kind of woman that will make you a better person if y
IF she wouldn't be so hot I would blocked her already, she actually has something new in her and that's what I like, kind of a challenge.


As for the calling you stupid insults, you need to put a stop to it. Look her right in the eye and tell her to show respect, and walk away if she doesn't.
Everything was over FB, she probably wouldn't dare tell me that in person... And yeah I''l probably have to wait a bit to get her out... last time it was a strict NO.
 

Kotaix

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Don't wait for anything. Tell her you'll only talk to her in person and stick to it, part of keeping your frame. And if her parents are divorced, huge red flag. She's probably learned her attitude from her mother.
 
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