Comparing yourself to others

[kabatura]

Why do we do it?

Why should or should we not do it?

 

[lil hooligan]

this is what i need out of my system, it is human nature but thinking DGAF is alot better and thats what im heading for

 

[ready123]

what do you think?

 

[oakraiderz2]

People make social comparision who are either higher on the totem pole, upward social comparision, or lower on the totem pole, downward social comparisions. Comparing yourself to poeple who are higher causes one to feel inferior and depressed because theyre not on the same level. People often criticize those who are higher up as well. Making downward comparisions usually elevates ones mood. Basically, compare youself to yourself and strive hard not make upward comparision.

 

[DevanE]

It's called competition. I feel that we as humans are WIRED for competition but after a certain age it REALLY does become childish if you ask me especially when you make a habit of it in everything you do. However, their is healthy competition and acknowledging the fact that you've been beaten by your competitor in a respectful manner. I know people in real life that compete and "size"/compare people over everything and I mean EVERYTHING. Being the best dressed, strongest, better looking, ladies man, etc etc...you name I've seen it and the worst part about it is that these are the same people that CAN'T handle REAL competition because they invest so much of their ego's in being the "best"...it's really sickening if you ask me. I've butted heads with some of these same people and the funny thing is that they tend to "shun" you out whether it's from their group or just in general because they can't stand the fact that someone MIGHT be a a little bit above their level. Even in school people constantly compare themselves to each other especially GIRLS.

NEVER do that EVER...never compare yourself to ANYONE because everyone has different circumstances, environments, backgrounds etc etc so it makes the entire thinking/mindset completely pointless. Seriously why should I give a fuk if a guy is driving a better car than me...? He might have won the lottery, could have won it in a sweepstakes, for all you know it could be leased. I have a particular "friend" that THRIVES on comparing himself to everyone...he doesn't say it but I can see the resentment in his eyes and sense when he feels that someone is "better" than him in certain aspects but the sad part is that he really doesn't DO anything to better himself but rather stagnate his own growth as a man by dwelling on BS that doesn't even pertain to him.

Compare yourself to YOURSELF and only YOURSELF...look back to how much you have changed and grown from your past self to the person you are now. Don't worry about other people's business and comparing yourself to them...worry about your own sh** bruh!!!.

 

[Ingeniarius]

I compare myself to people I admire and wonder what traits/virtues/skills/passions they have that I don't. Then I think about if I want to acquire some of these things because I deem them good or moral or however you wish to name it. In essence, I use comparison with other people like a role model.

Sometimes I even do it in writing, making long lists or mindmaps about people I like, then looking for these properties. I don't truly think badly about myself if I find something I can't do or don't do yet, I just try to find a place for it in my life. I actually find that ever since I started this, I tend to enjoy life more because I don't beat myself up over my own shortcomings.

Most often it's easiest to start with people you know personally (the jerk that got the girl you had a crush on in high school is a really good example to pull traits out of), but to really get started in depth about this you ought to read biographies of famous men who got what they wanted (Franklin, Kissinger, Washington, Lincoln, Helmut Schmidt, Winston Churchill etc etc etc).

 

[lildevil]

Ha ha ha in my really deep down Afc years I use to try to imagine I was someone else and act like them...

 

[Deep Dish]

I have an answer from a different perspective than most. In life abroad, there are many people seeking to maximize their life, to get the best deals; these are bargain shoppers, but the mall of life extends well beyond the actual shopping malls, spilling into all affairs. Conversely, there are people who are simply satisfied with what they have; they don't do extensive comparative research, they simply say "Okay, this is fine." The problem can arise when these satisfiers meet maximizers, for the maximizers will say, essentially, in different expressions and sentiments, "You're an idiot!" The maximizers are correct in pointing out someone could have gotten a better deal, done more research, negotiated better, or can trade-up their romantic partner for someone more attractive or adept, but the maximizers are wrong about intelligence and satisfaction. The maximizers are most likely to find the best deals, maximize the options in their life, but lest they also be least likely to be and remain satisfied—the law of diminishing returns; but nonetheless, the thought process of the maximizers affect and can infect the minds of satisfiers.

It is natural and inevitable to compare ourselves to others, wondering or finding all the different options our life may take or possess; we are, after all, similar to other mammals, highly social creatures. There are also some built-in strategic advantages, including avoiding other people's mistakes and short-comings. Since we live in world ripe with options and each option carries additional analytical overhead, we become overburdened by the processes of decision-making and thus the strategy developed to rely on other people's judgements, thus the phenomena arose of social proof.

Think: every time you find someone proclaiming to (be trying to be) " living life to its fullest," what do you suppose prompted them.

There are positives and negatives of comparing yourselves to others, there is a fine balance to be struck between weights, but for anyone to say "Never compare yourself to anyone" is incorrect.

Pook once put it this way, paraphrased: dumb people compare themselves to dumb people, smart people compare themselves to geniuses. Dumb people, with nothing to compare against, stagnate. Smart people know they have not been leading their life as wisely or brilliantly, thus they try to improve their life. Ergo, why the dumb get dumber and the smart get smarter.

 

[Bible_Belt]

If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain or bitter,
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

http://www.fleurdelis.com/desiderata.htm